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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28333908">a storm we're meant to ride</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaypurgatory/pseuds/gaypurgatory'>gaypurgatory</a>, <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/wynhaaught/pseuds/wynhaaught'>wynhaaught</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wynonna Earp (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Angst, Band Fic, Best Friends to Lovers, Check notes in each chapter for more info!, Denial of Feelings, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Girl Band, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, So much Wynonna trauma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 02:33:42</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>65,373</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28333908</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaypurgatory/pseuds/gaypurgatory, https://archiveofourown.org/users/wynhaaught/pseuds/wynhaaught</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Wynonna and Nicole meet and bond over their shared love of music. Together, they form a band with Wynonna's sister, Waverly, and Nicole's best friend, Shae. Despite Michelle Earp (stage name: Michelle Gibson) being a renowned musician, neither of the Earp sisters have much contact with her and refuse to ride her coattails. This is the story of their trek to fame... Along the way, some feelings may be denied, realized, denied some more, completely shattered, and more... </p><p>Eventual Wynonna &amp; Nicole romance, eventual Rosita &amp; Waverly romance. </p><p>**We are using all HAIM songs as their original songs. We will also borrow from other artists and will denote that in the notes of the chapter... Enjoy!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rosita Bustillos/Waverly Earp, Shae Pressman/Cleo Clanton, Wynonna Earp/Nicole Haught</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>164</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>128</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. fresh start</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Opening song is <em>Falling</em> by HAIM.</p><p>Here's a link to the playlist: <a href="https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA">https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA</a>. Have fun figuring out which songs have emotional significance and which ones are merely covered/mentioned.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>January 4, 2020</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The Twin Flame Rock Club is packed tonight. The band has been playing anywhere they could for close to three years now. This venue is special, though. So many bands have played here right before they’re “discovered” and really launch into the business. This could be it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Percussion sounds like a heartbeat as the opening beats of their first song is played. Red and blue lights are low and flash with each beat in the darkness. The moment Waverly sings the first words, the lights rise and illuminate the four of them in the most beautiful way. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Falling </span>
  </em>
  <span>is one of the first songs they’d ever written together and opens most of their shows. It is their way of introducing themselves to new people. As the song comes to an end, Nicole grins wide and looks out across the crowd. “How are you guys feeling tonight, Twin Flame?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The crowd hoops, hollers, and jumps. The energy is addictive and it is one of the best things about standing on a stage like this. Wynonna drums a light rhythm to help with the noise. Nicole chuckles right into the microphone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, what weak shit was that?” Wynonna says directly into hers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole turns to look over her shoulder and grin at her best friend. She faces the crowd again. “Alright, our drummer says that was weak shit… So… Twin Flame, let’s try it again… How are you feeling tonight?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The response is noticeably louder and Wynonna plays a more intense rhythm on her drums to match the energy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Satisfied back there?” Nicole questions.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hardly… But we’ll see if we can get ‘em going…” Wynonna jokes, going back to the light background rhythm she plays to fill the silence in their shows. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, some of you may know us already…” Nicole starts. “We’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>Chasing Skylarks. </span>
  </em>
  <span>I’m Nicole Haught, I play the guitar and sing a little bit… Over on the bass, we have my dear friend, Shae Pressman…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shae rocks out a bass solo for the next few seconds and the audience cheers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“On the keys and with the voice of an angel, we have Waverly Earp…” Nicole introduces. Waverly plays her solo and smiles so brightly that her eyes nearly disappear when the crowd cheers for her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I saved the worst for last…” Nicole teases. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck you, Haughty, I’ll introduce my damn self,” Wynonna interrupts. “I’m Wynonna fucking Earp… Yes, that </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>my middle name!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole turns to watch as Wynonna lets loose on her drum set. The audience roars into the loudest round of applause yet. This usually happens. There’s just something about a “chick on sticks” that usually gets the crowds going. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, alright, we get it,” Nicole says. “Let’s give the people what they really want -- a show!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Throughout their set, they play mostly original songs and sprinkle in a few covers--Wynonna wows with her cover of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fresh Start </span>
  </em>
  <span>by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts. Partway through almost all of their songs, the crowd starts to pick up on some of the words and sings along. There are a few of their fans who already know the words and that’s the </span>
  <em>
    <span>best </span>
  </em>
  <span>fucking feeling in the world. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly’s angelic voice melts listeners’ hearts. Waverly locks eyes with a striking woman in the crowd and her heart suddenly tries to beat right out of her chest. It feels ridiculous… How many beautiful people had she locked eyes with over the last three years? It never feels like this. She shakes her head and goes back to playing the melody and singing the lyrics. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>All of them sing different songs, showcasing the talent that is spread throughout the four of them perfectly. The show goes perfectly and the high that comes after it is unlike any that they’ve felt so far. Every time the crowd demands an encore, they know it’s a win. This time, they do. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>Waverly and Shae stumble into the green room of the club, laughing and talking. Wynonna’s on Nicole’s back as she walks in, having jumped up there the moment they were offstage. The four of them are buzzing and bouncing, talking over each other about how amazing the show felt, when there’s a soft knock at the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly moves to open the door and her heart stops. It’s the woman from the crowd. How did she get back here? Who is she? The younger Earp’s mouth parts slightly and she just </span>
  <em>
    <span>stares. </span>
  </em>
  <span>The woman smiles brightly at her and that doesn’t help one bit. The woman’s lips are so full that it’s almost sinful how badly Waverly wants to kiss her without knowing one single thing about her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Those cheeks. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Those cheeks make her melt. She’s breathtaking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hi, I’m Rosita Bustillos,” the woman informs and holds out her hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It takes Waverly a few seconds to respond. Waverly’s gone useless in a matter of seconds. Wynonna looks down at her best friend who returns the expression--amusement. She’s still holding her in place on her back. Shae looks between all of them and places a palm against her face. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Idiots</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she thinks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finally, Waverly reaches out and takes Rosita’s hand. “I’m--”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Waverly… Voice of an angel…  I paid attention.” The woman’s voice is slightly raspy and </span>
  <em>
    <span>too sexy. </span>
  </em>
  <span>“Red’s Nicole… Purple streaks in the hair is Wynonna… Beautiful bassist is Shae.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And who are you?” Shae asks, being the only one with the brain cells to have an intelligent conversation when faced with this new woman. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I manage talent… I have a few clients that are seeing success right now, and I was wondering if you all had a manager.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, damn… Looks like we do now,” Wynonna smirks. Nicole catches her off guard by dropping her onto the ground. The redhead gives her a pointed look. “Geeze, what? She’s hot…” Wynonna says quietly to where she thinks only Nicole can hear her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, and?” Nicole whispers back. “We can’t hire her because she’s hot.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why the fuck not? I started being friends with you because you’re hot--look how that turned out!” Wynonna teases. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shae clears her throat and the two best friends turn their attention back to the </span>
  <em>
    <span>hot </span>
  </em>
  <span>potential manager. “Who are some of your other clients?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rosita walks farther into the room past a still-dumbfounded Waverly. Waverly’s eyes never leave her. “I’ve mostly worked with artists based on commission… Some you may know, some you may not. Troye Sivan, Mary Lambert, those are a couple of more known artists. Julien Baker, Maylee Todd… I like working with artists who are in the family…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The family?” Wynonna questions with a chuckle. “You mean gay, right?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rosita nods. “As a bisexual woman, it’s important to me to help cultivate LGBTQIA+ artists. I figured at least one of you would fall under that umbrella…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna’s face lights up. Hearing the extremely hot woman who had just waltzed into their green room is </span>
  <em>
    <span>bisexual… </span>
  </em>
  <span>She smirks again and takes a step past Nicole to get closer to Rosita. “All of us do,” Wynonna replies.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, so do you just want us to check off a box or…?” Shae chimes in again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The manager shakes her head. “No, I’m not like that… I don’t go after talent unless I </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel </span>
  </em>
  <span>something about them. It’s been a while since I sat through a concert in this club that really made me think something big could happen. You guys have that. I’m looking for a band to give one-hundred percent of my effort to. If you’re interested.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why us?” Nicole finally pipes up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly is still watching everything unfold without saying a word. There’s a feeling in the pit of her stomach about Rosita. It’s something she can’t place and something that terrifies her. The pull makes her ache in the chest. So, she doesn’t comment. She’s not sure what to say anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole and Shae had always been the brains behind the operation. Wynonna knows more than she lets on. With a famous musician for a mother, she’d learned the ugliness of the business a long time ago. Still, she listens quietly and lets Shae and Nicole ask the questions. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Like I said, it’s a feeling. Love your sound, love your stage presence. The dynamic makes for a good show and I think you guys felt that tonight. So did I.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, but we’re pretty much broke right now…” Wynonna comments. “What cut are you going to take?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rosita narrows her eyes. “Usually for bands starting out, they suggest twenty percent...” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna’s eyebrows shoot up and she’s about to protest, but Rosita continues, “But this isn’t about money. I’m willing to do fifteen.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The four bandmates start to exchange looks. “Let us huddle for a second?” Nicole asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“By all means…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The four of them walk as far away as they can from the woman and start to whisper to one another. Rosita walks away as well, aimlessly looking around the room while they talk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fifteen is standard, and pretty good…” Wynonna tells her bandmates. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah… She seems pretty passionate, too… Not like some bitch who’ll make us sellout,” Shae adds. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you say, Waves?” Nicole turns to look at her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly seems to wake up out of a daze. “Hmm? Oh… Yeah agree… Totally.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you even listening, baby girl?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course, I am, ‘Nonna… Good rate… Not a bitch… Yep yep.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re so useless… You just keep thinking about how hot she is,” Wynonna pokes fun at her younger sister. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What!? I so do </span>
  <em>
    <span>not!” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly protests. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The lady doth protest too much…” Wynonna further aggravates. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, whatever, look… We don’t have to make the decision right now. Let’s get her card and think on it?” Shae butts in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sounds good,” the guitarist agrees. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They break apart. Shae and Nicole walk over to their maybe soon-to-be manager and get her attention. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’ll it be?” Rosita asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll take your card and think about it, if that’s okay… We want to maybe try to get in touch with some of your clients and ask a bit about you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s fair. Feel free to ask anyone who’ll talk to you. Give me a call by the end of next week?” Rosita asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Deal.” Shae reaches out and shakes the woman’s hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rosita looks past them both and stares into Waverly’s eyes for far too long. Her lips curl up in a subtle smile as she sees the way the singer seems to be staring straight into her heart and soul. “See you guys soon,” she says confidently before leaving the band alone again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole turns back towards the sisters and holds her hands out by her sides. “Holy shit! This could be huge for us…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna walks up to her best friend and nudges her. “Sounds like we should go out for drinks… Haughty’s buying, huh?” she jokes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The redhead shakes her head and drapes her arm over Wynonna’s shoulder. “Fine. One round on me.” </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>
    <span>Three days later </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Wynonna lays across Nicole’s couch with her legs draped over Nicole’s lap. She’s scrolling on her phone, aimlessly cycling through all her social media apps, switching between her personal accounts and the band’s accounts. There are a few responses waiting in the band account’s direct messages. She opens them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A couple of Rosita’s clients got back to us…” She says absentmindedly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole scrolls to the accounts on her phone and reads the same messages as Wynonna. “All good things… Not a single damn bad thing said about her…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Plus, she wasn’t lying. All of them know who she is… She’s worked with some really talented artists… Who have seen success… Making this a real career.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“FaceTime Waves and Shae.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna opens their group chat and presses the group FaceTime button. A few rings later, both of the women are on the call. Wynonna shifts so that she can lean against Nicole’s body with them both in frame. Nicole’s arm goes instinctively around her shoulder as they sit there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna speaks first. “Hey losers, have you seen the replies from the people we reached out to about Rosita?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They both answer with a no and go to look. A few moments later, they reappear on screen and Waverly speaks first, “So, basically she’s perfect?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, we’re talking about a business decision here, Waves… Keep it in your pants,” Wynonna jokes. Nicole chuckles beside her and rolls her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s not what I was--” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can you please relax? I’m joking. Geeze, your panties stay in a wad lately.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She does seem pretty legit,” Shae continues. “If she’s willing to work with us even though we’re just starting up… I say we give it a shot. She probably won’t want a contract anyway, so we can always just tell her it’s not working out if it goes south…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, we’re all in agreement?” Nicole asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Looks like we have a super hot, sexy new manager…. Waves, you wanna make the call?” Wynonna asks, grinning mischievously. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly only rolls her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll make the call,” Shae says. “We’ll set up a meeting. We’ll all get on the same page before we go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sounds good. Okay, we’re gonna go now byeeeeeee,” Wynonna says, ending the call before she even waits for the others to reply. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Neither of them make a move to pull apart from one another. Wynonna goes back to lazily scrolling through her phone. Nicole does the same. More times than not, the two of them end up like this. The comfort in their silence is one that Wynonna’s only ever known with Nicole. As much as the taller woman could drive her up the wall, she also planted her firmly on the ground. She surrounded her and made her feel safe for precious moments. She would never be able to repay her best friend, but she knows Nicole would never ask her to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole’s hand has fallen to Wynonna’s upper arm and her thumb moves without thought in soothing motions over the fabric of Wynonna’s shirt. Moments like these are Nicole’s favorite, because she can pretend. She can pretend that Wynonna wants to be in her arms in a different way. She can pretend that Wynonna is more than just her best friend. Pretending has become one of the talents Nicole has completely mastered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna curses, breaking the silence.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Nicole asks casually. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I accidentally just liked an old post on Rosita’s instagram… She’s gonna know I was stalking her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Shit, </span>
  </em>
  <span>it was from like two years ago…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole looks over Wynonna’s shoulder and blows out an annoyed huff. “She’s not </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>hot…” Nicole grumbles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna shifts so she can look up at Nicole’s face. Her expression shows utter dismay. “Are you </span>
  <em>
    <span>kidding? </span>
  </em>
  <span>She</span>
  <em>
    <span> so</span>
  </em>
  <span> is that hot! You have eyes, don’t you? Damn, you must think I look like a mountain troll if you don’t think she’s hot.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shut the fuck up, you’re way hotter than she is,” Nicole assures, shaking her head with annoyance. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You think I’m hotter than </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>woman?” Wynonna raises the phone and shows a particularly attractive photo of Rosita from some party or mixer she’d attended not long ago. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I think you’re hotter than every woman, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole thinks. Outwardly, she merely nods. “Definitely… While we’re on the topic though, please don’t try to sleep with our maybe, hopefully, new manager, Wyn.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna laughs darkly and leans her head back against Nicole’s shoulder. “Waves has googly eyes for her… So even if I </span>
  <em>
    <span>did </span>
  </em>
  <span>want to sleep with her… I wouldn’t.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Waves shouldn’t sleep with her, either,” Nicole says, trying to ignore the way bile always rises in her throat whenever Wynonna talks about sleeping with other people--and worse, when she actually does it. A lot. It makes her feel so shitty. Wynonna’s her best friend so she has no right to these feelings, yet they linger within her every single day. They always had. She thinks they always will. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna is amused when she replies, “She probably won’t.” A beat passes. “Waves isn’t big on hookups. She’s all about the feels when it comes to sex. Took her forever to realize that I wasn’t in love with every person I rolled around in the sack with.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Who are you in love with? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole wonders. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, Haughtstuff… Break’s over. Let’s get back to writing this song,” Wynonna says. The moment she pulls away from Nicole, the guitarist feels a piece of her break apart. It happens every time. Pretending is over. She’s writing a song with her best friend and bandmate. That’s it. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>
    <span>Two days later </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Damn, Waves…” Wynonna remarks when she comes out of her room to see Waverly adjusting her necklaces in the mirror that hangs on the wall in their living room. The elder sister pads over to examine the outfit Waverly is perfecting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly wears light blue, high-waisted jeans. A baggy green button-down is tucked into those jeans and hangs off one of her shoulders to expose a black lace bralette. Three gold necklaces are around her neck--one hangs low in the middle of her cleavage, the other two are closer to where her neck begins. Thin, gold bracelets match the other accessories perfectly. Her hair falls in loose, natural waves down her back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna reaches for the fabric of the shirt over her forearm. She lifts her arm by the fabric and sees beautiful pink roses embroidered on the outside of the sleeve. “What the fuck is this? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Roses </span>
  </em>
  <span>for </span>
  <em>
    <span>Rosita?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can you shut up!?” Waverly snaps, yanking her arm away from Wynonna. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh c’mon! When the hell did you go out and buy that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I have </span>
  <em>
    <span>had </span>
  </em>
  <span>this shirt for a very long time, thank you very much! And no… I hadn’t even thought about… that. I just wanted to wear this shirt! I think I look cute!” The pitch of her voice gives her away. Even if Waverly could lie, there is no hiding the fact that this outfit has been carefully picked right down to the smallest ring on her pinky. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uh huh...” Wynonna drawls skeptically. “You do look really good, though. All eyes are gonna be on you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna throws on her fringed leather jacket over her favorite Star Wars shirt. Black ripped jeans tuck into her boots. She’s not trying to impress anyone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly lets her lips twitch up into a little smile. “You think so?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rolling her eyes, Wynonna throws her head back. “For sure, baby girl. Shae’s still with that Cleo chick… I’m not interested… And Haught? She fuckin’ said Rosita wasn’t even that hot the other day..”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“WHAT?!” The offense in Waverly’s voice makes her older sister cackle. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know. She thinks </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m </span>
  </em>
  <span>hotter than that woman? Fuckin’ weirdo…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly’s face shifts. Amusement shines in her eyes as she chews at the skin on the inside of her lip. “Wow… Shocking.” Sarcasm seeps in every syllable. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What’s that mean?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing! You ready? Nicole’s gonna be here soon!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Right on cue, there’s a knock at the door. Wynonna sighs. She was just about to give her sister hell. She always does when Waverly tries to say some stupid shit suggesting that Nicole has… </span>
  <em>
    <span>feelings </span>
  </em>
  <span>for her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Somewhere deep inside of Wynonna, she acknowledges the slight truth every time Waverly teases. Every defense combats every acknowledgment every time. Nicole is steadfast and kind. She could be friends with anyone. The fact that they’re best friends is proof of that. No one else had ever checked Wynonna the way Nicole does--all while doing it in a way that never has Wynonna doubting her fondness. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>None of that matters </span>
  <em>
    <span>here</span>
  </em>
  <span>, though. Nicole deserves so much better than what Wynonna can give her--a shattered heart, broken soul, and so much baggage that they could fill mansions. She can’t ruin what she </span>
  <em>
    <span>does </span>
  </em>
  <span>have with Nicole. This is the one thing in her life that she unquestioningly cannot let herself blow up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna pulls the door open and finds Nicole standing there with her signature dopey grin. “Are the Earp girls ready to sell our souls?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Waves is ready give over her body, too,” Wynonna teases. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly stomps over and smacks her sister’s bicep. Nicole’s eyebrows raise at the sight of the shortest woman. “Oh, so am I droppin’ you off at a date or something, Waves? You know we have a </span>
  <em>
    <span>business </span>
  </em>
  <span>meeting, right?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uagh! Sorry I put a little bit of effort into my appearance. You two should try it some time!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ooh! Feisty Waves… Rosita’s gonna eat you out… I mean </span>
  <em>
    <span>up,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Wynonna jokes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly shoves past the both of them, leaving them to snigger with one another at Waves’ frustration. “You think she’ll be able to actually say something to her this time?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let’s go find out!” </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>The three of them arrive at the restaurant and walk over to the table where Shae is seated alone. Nicole and Wynonna sit beside each other, Waverly sits down beside Shae, and there’s an empty chair at the end of the table right next to the youngest Earp. She </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>hates her bandmates right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Exactly six minutes later, Waverly feels a shift in the atmosphere and her green eyes are pulled up to find Rosita walking their way. She swallows thickly at the sight of her. Suddenly, she’s not feeling so confident about her outfit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The most breathtaking woman in the world walks with command, power radiating from her in palpable streams. A deep red satin blouse is unbuttoned all the way down past her breasts and is tucked into black trouser pants that sit on the curve of her waist. A thin black belt holds them in place. A crescent moon chain hangs over her chest, just above where her breasts are visible. So much delicious skin is visible because the woman has opted to go without a bra. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, fuck me…” Wynonna murmurs when her blue eyes fall on the absolute vision. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>No one has the chance to comment before the woman approaches. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good to see you all again,” she comments smoothly. Her brown eyes linger on Waverly longer than anyone else. “I like your shirt.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly pulls her bottom lip in between her teeth before flashing Rosita a brilliant smile. “Thanks. I like yours, too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s my good luck shirt,” Rosita jokes as she takes her seat. Her forearms rest on the table in front of them as she links her hands. She leans towards Waverly and scrunches her nose. “Hoping it does me good today.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shae, Nicole, and Wynonna watch the interaction and exchange glances that the other two miss. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So… What have you got for me?” Rosita asks, turning to the rest of the band. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>It doesn’t take long for them to reach an agreement. Rosita will work for them based on commission, taking fifteen percent of their net earnings. If the band doesn’t get paid, neither does she. Rosita’s faith and vision for them feels genuine and incredible. Rosita is on their side… Or she has them completely fooled. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright… Now that we’re in business… Tell me more about the band. How’d you guys get started?” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. layla</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Nicole and Wynonna meet at Wynonna's favorite record shop. One rare record. Two people who want it.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here's a link to the playlist: <a href="https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA">https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA</a>. Have fun figuring out which songs have emotional significance and which ones are merely covered/mentioned.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>June 26, 2017 </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The way the summer sun beats down is a little unforgiving today. Even though she enjoys riding her motorcycle in this weather, Wynonna’s leather jacket feels a little too warm and she wishes for fall. She locks her helmet to the bike and shakes her hair out, adjusting the backpack on her shoulder and shoving her keys deep into the pocket of her black, ripped jeans. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Thankfully, her destination is just a short walk through the alley from where she parks.  Wynonna keeps her sunglasses on even after she steps foot inside the record store. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Devil Music is a little old record store tucked away in Toronto’s Annex. Every bit of space they have is taken up by records, CDs, old books and other cool shit. The store is well lit by tons of neon lights and lava lamps. Wynonna’s favorite neon sign is the big one on the very back wall of red devil horns and the words “The Devil has all the best tunes”. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The owners are older now, so the store is mostly run by their kids. The oldest one, Danny, is behind the counter today. She used to play games with him when they were kids and her mom would bring her here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For as long as she could remember, he’s always looked at her differently than his other siblings. The kind of way that suggests he might want to be more than friends. Wynonna could never imagine it and thankfully, he’s never been pushy or even mentioned it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Today is no different. Wynonna smiles at him and nods, moving to set her backpack by the counter like she always does. Danny gives her a stupid grin and nods back shyly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span> “Hey, Wyn. Been a while.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know, sorry. I’ve just been super busy.” Wynonna responds, looking through a New Releases display near the front. She raises her eyebrows and picks up Paramore’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>After Laughter, </span>
  </em>
  <span>tucking it underneath her arm. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No worries, I get it. But hey, there’s cool stuff this week! Lucky you’re here now, I guess. I think you’ll find something you really like.” He offers, talking to the back of her head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks, Danny.” Wynonna gives him a thumbs up and a brilliant smile. Danny just watches her walk past the counter and down the small set of steps into the open room packed with record bins. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Every week new records are brought in and Wynonna always tries to stop by at least once and look if she can. It’s been a couple of weeks since the last time she was in, maybe even three. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Truthfully, her record collection has gotten a little out of hand, but the only person complaining about that is her baby sister. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even though she’ll probably browse for way too long, Wynonna is only </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> looking for one record. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs</span>
  </em>
  <span> by Derek &amp; The Dominos has been at the top of her list for a while. It’s an old album, fairly popular but she’s never been able to find it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Waverly doesn’t get the appeal of hunting it down and has offered more than once to just order the thing for Wynonna but the older girl refuses. This is the best part. The thrill of finding something that you’ve been hunting for so long, holding it in your hands. She wouldn’t trade that for anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna finally pushes her sunglasses up onto the top of her head as she steps up to the first record bin. She notices few other people in the store, but doesn’t look directly at any of them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t really feel like being asked if she’s Michelle Gibson’s daughter or talking about her mother at all today. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna flips through a few bins without anything catching her eye. She tries not to get her hopes up much before digging into the first miscellaneous bin labeled ‘D’. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bins like this are where the bands and artists who don’t have enough records in the store to warrant a dedicated slot can be found. Wynonna knows that if </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla</span>
  </em>
  <span> is here, she’ll find her in this bin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her ringed fingers sift through the albums, blue eyes trained intently on each tattered edge. She’s trying to guess the album before she gets to it, but so many have a bright yellow edge and the anticipation makes her heart beat quick. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna spots the next album in the stack and she has to admit that it looks promising. She reaches for it at the same exact time as another hand does. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Long fingers with short, neat nails rest against Wynonna’s for just a little bit too long before the other person pulls back just a little. Wynonna doesn’t miss how big and strong these hands look, or the way the veins in them show. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pulls her eyes up, finally looking at the </span>
  <em>
    <span>person </span>
  </em>
  <span>standing on the other side of the bin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s a woman. A </span>
  <em>
    <span>tall</span>
  </em>
  <span> woman, Wynonna has to look up at her, even in her biker boots. She wishes she still had her sunglasses on because she’s sure the way her eyes widen must give her away. This woman is just ––</span>
  <em>
    <span> so fucking hot.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Her hair is short and red and comes down to her jaw. It’s tucked behind her ears, the same way Wynonna’s is. She’s dressed in light colored jeans and a fitting, vintage-looking Dolly Parton t-shirt is tucked into them. The way the sleeves are rolled up exposes her muscular, tattooed arms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She sees big brown eyes, a lip ring, a freckle high on her perfect cheekbone and a set of cute as hell dimples that show when she gives the dumb grin she’s giving now.</span>
  <em>
    <span> Fuck.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Wynonna knows she must be staring. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The brunette drops her gaze, laughing darkly and trailing her fingers over the record. For sure, the album they’d both landed on was the one she’d been dying to find. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I uh… I’ve been lookin’ for that record for a long time.” The redhead speaks up and her voice brings Wynonna’s eyes right back up. Her eyebrows lift, pulling together as she smirks up at the stranger. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What a coinky-dink… </span>
  <em>
    <span>Red</span>
  </em>
  <span>. So have I.” Wynonna teases. She’s well aware that every word out of her mouth sounds like flirting. It’s part of the fun. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The truth of that shows on the other woman’s face as her smile grows, deepening those dimples and making her cheeks redden just a little. The redhead runs her tongue over her bottom lip and looks up at Wynonna again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There’s just one. I think I reached for it first,” Wynonna continues. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think you’re wrong. I definitely reached first.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna narrows her eyes, her smirk pulling up even more and her own dimple deepening. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What the fuck is this, huh? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Star Wars</span>
  </em>
  <span> reference?” Wynonna questions, almost hopefully, poking her tongue into her cheek. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The other woman’s eyebrows raise. “Huh, didn’t peg you for a </span>
  <em>
    <span>Star Wars</span>
  </em>
  <span> fan. Say… I’ll </span>
  <em>
    <span>let </span>
  </em>
  <span>you buy the album –” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Woah, you’ll “</span>
  <em>
    <span>let me</span>
  </em>
  <span>”? Nuh-uh…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hold your horses, let me finish… I'll let you buy it, </span>
  <em>
    <span>if</span>
  </em>
  <span> you buy me coffee at the cool place down the street. I walked by it on my way over here and I’m gonna go there afterwards anyway.” She shrugs, smirking down at Wynonna. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The nameless woman’s lack of hesitation when it came to firing back at her excites the brunette. Wynonna definitely feels –- </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span> between the two of them. There’s an undeniable pull. She needs to see where it goes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You sure you touched it first?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Positive.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And that’s my ultimatum? Coffee? At a place I already like?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Take it or leave it. I know, I drive a hard bargain.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Fine</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I’ll buy you a goddamn coffee.” Wynonna chuckles, pulling the record from the bin when the other woman lets her hand slide away.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The taller woman laughs and it’s probably the most infectious sound Wynonna’s ever heard. She clutches </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla</span>
  </em>
  <span> to her chest before holding it out for a moment and looking at it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For an older record, the sleeve looks pretty good. She slips it out and checks it for scratches and finds it pristine. It’s like a goddamn miracle. Danny was right. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The redhead trails behind her as they head up to the counter. Wynonna looks over her shoulder before they quite get there and quirks a brow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You didn’t wanna look at anything else?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nah, I was lookin’ for a couple of hours before you came in.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve never seen you in here before.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re right. I’ve never been in here before. This is my first time.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A Devil Music virgin, huh… and you just so happen to want </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla</span>
  </em>
  <span> and nothing else? Same time – same day as me?” Wynonna’s eyes are narrowed as she jokingly interrogates her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The redhead shrugs. “What can I say, my collection is really fuckin’ big. There’s not a lot I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am</span>
  </em>
  <span> missing.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hmmph. Well. Sounds like fate to me.” Wynonna winks, teasing as she grabs her backpack and goes up to the counter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Danny watches her so stupidly as she pays for the two records. He wraps them in paper and bags them, something she’s grateful for since she’s on her bike. He tries to make small-talk, but Wynonna isn’t interested. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She says that she hopes she’ll be able to come by next week once the transaction is finished and turns back to the taller woman. Standing next to her like this, her height is more obvious and so is her subtle bulk. Wynonna can tell she’s really strong, muscles everywhere. It makes her bite her lip. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ready for your coffee, Red?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve got a name you know?” She laughs, holding the door open for Wynonna to walk out of. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huh… news to me. What is it then?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nicole. Nicole Haught.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna laughs. She has to, she can’t help it. The reaction draws an obvious look from Nicole, her eyebrows raising and lips pulling into a soft grin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey! What’s all that about?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I just – seriously you… you’re a </span>
  <em>
    <span>hot</span>
  </em>
  <span> redhead named </span>
  <em>
    <span>Haught</span>
  </em>
  <span> and you don’t see how that’s funny?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole feels like her face turns the color of her hair. </span>
  <em>
    <span>This</span>
  </em>
  <span> woman was calling her hot? The most beautiful woman she’s ever seen? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You think I’m hot?” She asks shyly, pushing a hand through her short hair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna looks up just in time to see it and the display cancels out any doubts she definitely didn’t have about her answer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck yeah, dude. Super hot.” Wynonna nods, looking away and shaking her head as they keep walking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It doesn’t take long for them to reach the coffee shop and Nicole holds the door open for her again. Wynonna isn’t used to this type of thing. People opening doors for her. She usually hates it, actually. But coming from Nicole, it’s –– endearing. And </span>
  <em>
    <span>sexy. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, thank you. Big compliment coming from you. Speakin’ of you… what do I call </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna’s heart begins to race a little bit. The fact that Nicole is asking could either mean she knows who she is and is pretending she doesn’t, or that she has no fucking clue. One glance up at the brown eyed woman and it becomes obvious that it’s the latter. Besides, Nicole doesn’t seem like a pretender. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wynonna.” She says simply, giving Nicole a soft, pretty smile. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole smiles right back at her. Since meeting this woman, she feels like she hasn’t stopped smiling. Her fucking cheeks will probably hurt later and she doesn’t even mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wynonna. Pretty name for a pretty woman. I like it.” She shrugs, turning slowly towards the menu board even though she knows what she wants. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna sighs in relief when she doesn’t even ask about her last name. She’ll figure it out eventually, Wynonna knows. Whether it’s because she tells her herself or some other way. But she’s fine living in this bubble for now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What am I ordering you?” Wynonna asks, passing off the bag of records when they’re the next in line. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s strange the way they so easily fall into this exchange. Wynonna’s never felt like this before upon meeting someone. Her guard is always up, a brick wall built so high that people can usually only ever peek over. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole makes her feel like the wall is just a chain link fence that the redhead has walked right up to and put her fingers through. It feels dangerous and terrifying and exhilarating. She’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>happy</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Iced caramel macchiato.” Nicole says sweetly, taking the records gently in her hands. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The taller woman watches Wynonna order their coffee, Nicole’s macchiato and her own iced black coffee. She feels like the choice tells her a lot about the other woman and it makes her bite her lip to hide her grin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna is so beautiful. Her long brunette hair with its one platinum blonde strand falls in curls over her dainty but strong shoulders. The shirt Wynonna is wearing underneath her leather jacket is cut low in the front and a red lacy bralette peaks over the edge. Nicole’s eyes flicker between that and the couple of tattoos she can see on this woman’s chest. Some words by her collarbone, the tips of wings that must wrap around her shoulders, and a sword that Nicole can tell goes down between her breasts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her blue eyes are striking and her nose is perfect, especially from where Nicole is standing. It’s pierced twice, once in the left nostril and the septum. It’s</span>
  <em>
    <span> super</span>
  </em>
  <span> fucking sexy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything physical about this woman is painfully gorgeous, but most of all, Nicole can’t stop thinking about the way Wynonna interacts with people. She seems to make everyone feel special. She’d made Nicole feel that way just by joking around with her for a second. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna is electric, Nicole could easily see herself becoming addicted. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before she knows it, Wynonna is walking past her and leading the way to an empty table outside. She pushes the door open with her hip, but Nicole doesn’t go through. She reaches above Wynonna’s head and holds the door, motioning with her other hand for Wynonna to go on. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna rolls her eyes playfully, but goes. They sit across from one another at a small table with an umbrella out in front of the coffee shop. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The shorter woman watches the way Nicole sits, her posture looks so perfect and her shoulders look so broad. She turns her cup around on the table with one of her big hands before she picks it up to take the first sip. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna shrugs out of her leather jacket and lets it drape across the back of the chair, resting her elbows on the table. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole’s eyes go to her arms immediately and she has to struggle to keep her breathing even. Her suspicions were right, the muscles on display are perfect. Wynonna’s tank top shows off her many tattoos and the taller woman can see that she was right about the wings. She finds herself wondering how the rest of the tattoo across Wynonna’s back might look. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, where are you from if you haven’t been to Devil Music before? Not from around here?” Wynonna’s voice cuts through her thoughts and Nicole has to shake her head and blink a few times to focus. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I uh - yeah. No. I’m not from here. I’m from a place near Calgary, actually. I’ve visited a lot, been all over the place really but I just moved here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna’s eyebrows lift and the corner of her mouth twitches. “Calgary? Ever heard of the Purgatory?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole smiles and nods as she finishes the sip of her coffee. “Yeah! Yes, I grew up not very far from there. Is that where you’re from?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna nods, finally sipping her own coffee. This feeling just keeps getting deeper and deeper the more she learns about the redhead. Learning that they’d grown up not very far from one another, Wynonna wonders again how long it’ll be until Nicole realizes who she is. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The whole town knew about her family’s accident when she was twelve. The accident that killed her dad and her older sister, Willa. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’d all been in the car, on the way to one of her mom’s shows. Waverly was just six and very tiny, sitting right beside Wynonna. That’s the only reason she was able to pull her out of the car after the wreck. She couldn’t save Willa or their daddy or the man who was driving them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know much about it to be honest, passed through a few times and seen the sign more times than I can count, but besides that...” She just shrugs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna feels relieved. Maybe she doesn’t know her or her family. Maybe she’s never heard of Wynonna’s famous mother. Maybe the slate could be clean with her. Maybe this could be something good. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not special. Kind of a little hellhole. Not the kind of town for a musician to stay in, that’s for damn sure.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So you’re a musician, then?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Damn right, Haughtstuff. I’m offended that you even asked. Thought I reeked of it.” The nickname rolls off of Wynonna’s tongue easily, she barely has to think. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole sits back in her chair and crosses her arms over her chest lifting an eyebrow. “Well, I don’t like to assume.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everyone else always does. Why not?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’d rather just learn by experience. So, you wanna tell me about it? First, what kind of music do you play? and second, what’s your favorite </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla</span>
  </em>
  <span> track and why? Let’s see if you even </span>
  <em>
    <span>deserved</span>
  </em>
  <span> for me to let you win.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna laughs so hard she snorts, leaning back in the chair and crossing her arms, mirroring Nicole. She’d never met someone who just gave her sass back to her this way. Nobody who could be just as much of an asshole as she was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, Haughtsauce. I sing and play the drums in a band that does mostly classic rock covers right now. It started off as a fill in type deal, but the guys are my friends and we have fun. It’s not bad.” Wynonna shrugs, sipping her coffee. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole’s eyes get wide and she must look like she’s seen a ghost because Wynonna laughs and shakes her head, waiting for the response. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You good?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You play the drums?” Nicole stammers out, finally. That isn’t something she expected, but now that she knows it, it actually makes perfect sense. Wynonna’s muscles, her attitude… of course she’s a drummer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why? That seem unbelievable to you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No… well, not in a bad way. I haven’t seen many girl drummers before. None that sing, too. Just never met one.” Nicole admits, drinking her coffee to stop herself from stammering dumbly some more. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve been doing it since I was a kid. It’s my favorite thing to do. Makes me feel… right.” Wynonna explains, but quickly clears her throat, reminding herself that she shouldn’t be opening up this much. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s how I feel about playing guitar.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s Wynonna’s turn to gawk. Her response isn’t as dramatic as Nicole’s had been, but she does this sideways smirk that turns into a grin and makes Nicole’s stomach twist. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You play music, too?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole nods, feeling the confidence she’d worn so proudly earlier begin to waver the cooler and sexier this woman gets. “I’ve never been in a band before though. I play with friends and stuff, played some bars and open mics but never had a real show.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you sing?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole’s face reddens a little and she nods again, rubbing at the back of her neck. “Guilty.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dude, this is so cool. I knew there was something about you… you just –-” Wynonna stops herself, smiling at Nicole as she tries to find the words. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t know what she’s trying to say and she doesn’t want to be weird. She won’t admit to this feeling that she feels, not yet. Maybe not ever.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just what?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I dunno… just a feeling.” Wynonna says, swirling her coffee with her straw before taking a long drink. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you write songs, too or just covers?” Nicole asks, intrigued. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I write. My little sister and I write stuff together sometimes, too. She sings, plays piano. Way fucking better than me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll believe it when I see it.” Nicole smirks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna smiles at her and shakes her head, looking down at her coffee. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You gonna tell me about the album now?” Nicole asks eventually, resting her elbows on the table. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So Eager.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Damn right. Someone likes one of my favorite albums almost as much as me, I wanna know about it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna laughs again and then finds herself trying to remember the last time she’d laughed this much. “Look, don’t even try to tell me I’m lame for this, but I think my favorite is </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla</span>
  </em>
  <span>. We play it a lot, the band I mean.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole can’t wipe the grin off her face. She couldn’t try to make fun if she wanted to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think it’s lame. I mean, damn, they named the album that for a reason. Plus I think seeing you play that song would be badass.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna’s a little surprised that Nicole doesn’t try to argue, or call her pick too generic. She’s understanding and genuine with her response and Wynonna hates how it makes her feel warm all the way to her toes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe you will one day.” Wynonna teases. “Well? what’s your favorite?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh. Uh –” Nicole gets distracted by the prospect of seeing Wynonna play anything at all, let alone that song. Her speaking voice is already perfect. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Golden.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Nicole can’t imagine how hearing her sing would make her feel. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Have You Ever Loved A Woman? </span>
  </em>
  <span>is mine, I think.</span>
  <em>
    <span>” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole knows that if Wynonna, who was drenched in gay vibes herself, hadn’t realized Nicole likes women by now, that this would be the moment. Nicole braces herself for that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sounds pretty gay, Red.” Wynonna sighs, looking up at Nicole through her lashes. “I know, cause I played that song on repeat and sulked in my room when I was a teenager and thought I was in love this one time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna’s admission makes Nicole almost choke on her coffee. The redhead coughs a few times, finally getting herself back together. The two of them fall into an easy fit of laughter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They talk for hours. About music, movies, artists, the city… everything. It’s normal and it flows like water. Wynonna has never meshed this well with someone. Ever. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>By the time they’re walking back to her bike, Wynonna makes an inward promise to herself that she’ll never, ever fuck this up. No matter how hot this girl is, how funny or sexy… Wynonna tells herself she’ll never fuck up this connection by sleeping with her or trying to date her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Besides</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she realizes, </span>
  <em>
    <span>even if I wanted to… she’s too perfect for me. I don’t deserve her. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“That was a good time, Haught. Maybe I can give you a ride on my motorcycle sometime or something.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Think you could teach me to drive it?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hell no. My bike is my baby. I don’t trust anyone with it.” She admits, looking up into those big brown eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole wears a subtle smile and her eyes shine in a way that makes Wynonna’s heart melt without her trying. Fuck, it’s nauseating. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine, god… yeah, maybe one day. We’ll see. Gotta figure out if I trust you or not then we’ll talk about that, Haughtstuff. Don’t push it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole laughs, “Alright, Alright… don’t worry. I’ll stick around long enough for you to figure out if you trust me or not.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wynonna hates how hopeful that sentence makes her feel. “We have a show this weekend at The Rockpile. If you wanna come, I’ll have your name on the list.” Wynonna says as she unlocks her helmet from her bike and begins securing her records in one of the saddlebags. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole’s heart rate picks up at the thought of seeing Wynonna play music so soon. She’ll get to know what her voice sounds like. What she looks like playing the drums. It almost makes her shiver. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll be there.” Nicole promises, knowing she’d cancel any plans she already had to be able to keep that promise. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nice. You’ve got my number, so… you can text me whenever. Don’t be shy.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole laughs softly, nodding and pushing her hands into her pockets. “I’ll remember that. It was nice meeting you, Wynonna.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole says her name in a way that makes her bones hurt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nice meeting you, Haught. See you this weekend.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll see you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Nicole peeks over her shoulder as she walks to her car, watching the way Wynonna mounts her bike and takes off. The smile she’d been wearing since she met the woman doesn’t leave her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When she gets settled in her car, the first song she turns on is</span>
  <em>
    <span> Layla</span>
  </em>
  <span> by Derek and the Dominos. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. dreams</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The band lets Rosita in on their beginnings. Wynonna and Nicole recount the first time they ever played together. Rosita shows the band what she can do as their new manager.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here's a link to the playlist: <a href="https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA">https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA</a>. Have fun figuring out which songs have emotional significance and which ones are merely covered/mentioned.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>“Alright… Now that we’re in business… Tell me more about the band. How’d you guys get started?”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well I think that I-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I got us together.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole and Wynonna speak at the same time. They turn towards one another and share the same smug look. It’s one of their favorite games to play. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuckin hell, here we go,” Shae murmurs under her breath, slinking down into her chair and reaching for her drink. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Haught… You know that </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m </span>
  </em>
  <span>the reason you even </span>
  <em>
    <span>thought </span>
  </em>
  <span>about starting a band,” Wynonna says with an almost-wicked smirk on her face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Puh-fuckin’-lease, Earp! How many times do we have to go over this?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I guess as many as it takes to get through that hard head of yours, Red. You will never fuckin’ convince me that you wanted to start a band with me before </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>called </span>
  <em>
    <span>you </span>
  </em>
  <span>up on stage that night.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole leans back and lets her hand fall down onto the table in front of them. Her other arm drapes across the back of Wynonna’s chair, leaning in close to her best friend. “How many damn times do I have to tell you I had already asked Shae about getting a band together long before I even had the misfortune of meeting you?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The argument appears heated to anyone who isn’t Nicole, Wynonna, Waverly, or Shae. Shae continues to sip her drink while the two of them feed off of one another. Waverly cuts her eyes at Rosita, trying to get a read on the way this is affecting their new partnership. The manager has the smallest hint of a smile playing at the corner of her lips. It makes Waverly feel things deep in her chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna shakes her head slowly, moving in closer to establish her dominance in the situation. “Waverly and I have been talking about starting a band since she was in fuckin’ diapers if that’s your argument!” The brunette whips her head towards their new manager and continues, “Listen… Haughty saw me play with this old cover band I was in with some friends and was </span>
  <em>
    <span>dying</span>
  </em>
  <span> to get in a band with me, but you know I love playing hard to get…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly murmurs this time. “More like </span>
  <em>
    <span>impossible </span>
  </em>
  <span>to get.“ </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole freezes with Wynonna’s last declaration and shakes her head. The weight of Wynonna playing </span>
  <em>
    <span>hard to get</span>
  </em>
  <span> hasn’t gotten any easier over the years. The drummer would never even give them a chance as more than friends. Not that Nicole could blame Wynonna. Wynonna’s too cool for her, too good. Nicole may play guitar, but she’s still some tall dork while Wynonna is… Wynonna.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna jumps at the chance to take advantage of the silence and recounts the first night Nicole ever watched Wynonna play the drums. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>July 1, 2017</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Summer is in full swing in Toronto. Every show they play is packed, almost never because </span>
  <em>
    <span>they’re playing, </span>
  </em>
  <span>but it’s packed either way. Wynonna stands in the crowd with Waverly, talking over the music that plays over the loudspeakers. The stage is empty for now until the night gets a little more mature.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s eyes keep going to the entrance every few moments and Waverly finally notices. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you expecting someone, ‘Nonna?” Waverly asks with a small glint in her eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” It takes a moment before Waverly’s words finally process in Wynonna’s brain. “Oh… I just… invited someone I met a few days ago. She said she’d be here.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s eyebrow shoots up at </span>
  <em>
    <span>she. </span>
  </em>
  <span>“Well, there’s still a little while before you guys go on. What time did you tell her to get here?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Gross, I didn’t tell her to get here at any time. I’m not her keeper,” Wynonna defends herself from an attack that isn’t happening. “Just told her we went on at eight…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The younger Earp pulls her eyebrows together and studies her sister. It’s unlike her to have an emotional response of any kind about someone. It’s also unlike Wynonna to invite anyone besides Waverly to her shows. Even with Wynonna’s parade of </span>
  <em>
    <span>buddies, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly can’t remember a single one of them showing up to support Wynonna at her request. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh wait, that’s her,” Wynonna comments. Her posture straightens and immediately she seems brighter, more alive. It’s impossible for Waverly to miss when her green eyes are fixed so carefully on her sister. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wordlessly, Waverly tears her gaze away to find the woman in question. She’s taller than most of the people here, if even by a couple of inches. Short, red hair is pulled off of her face with a pair of wayfarer sunglasses atop her head. This woman is </span>
  <em>
    <span>hot </span>
  </em>
  <span>and there’s no denying that. Waverly rolls her lips between her teeth to keep from grinning. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna doesn’t notice. She regards Nicole steadily and raises a hand when she sees the tall woman begin to scan the room. It only takes a moment before those puppy-dog eyes find her and a smile stretches across Nicole’s mouth, deepening those sickeningly cute dimples in her cheeks. Nicole waves back and starts her determined trek towards them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey!” Nicole breathes out loudly once she’s standing a few inches away from the pair of Earps. “Was hopin’ you’d be here a little early.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The sincerity in the redhead’s voice catches Wynonna off-guard in the same moment that it feels so utterly and entirely </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole. </span>
  </em>
  <span>How Wynonna knows that… She can’t peg. Sure, they’d spent hours talking on Monday. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Sure, </span>
  </em>
  <span>they’d texted every day since about the most random shit. But, who was Wynonna to say what </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>or </span>
  <em>
    <span>isn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I like to come get a feel for places before I rock the shit out of ‘em,” Wynonna jokes. “Helps me pick up the vibes of the joint--know what energy I need to put in.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly nudges Wynonna with her elbow. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ah, shit! Haughtstuff, this is my sister, Waverly. Waverly, Haughtstuff,” Wynonna introduces. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You can just call me Nicole,” the redhead assures the shortest woman. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hot… Stuff?” Waverly flashes an inquisitive look between her sister and her new </span>
  <em>
    <span>friend</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s my last name. Haught. Let’s go ahead and get it out of the way. H-a-u-g-h-t. Yes, I’m a </span>
  <em>
    <span>hot redhead named Haught</span>
  </em>
  <span> as your sister loved pointing out on Monday. I don’t think I’ve heard as many puns about it my whole life as I have since I met this one.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna </span>
  <em>
    <span>pffts </span>
  </em>
  <span>and shrugs. “Sorry that you haven’t met anyone who’s a master wordsmith like me, Tater Haught. I haven’t even started scratching the surface of what I’m gonna end up calling you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Puns are definitely Wynonna’s thing,” Waverly interjects, chuckling at the way the two of them interact. She’s never seen Wynonna with an honest-to-God friend. Danny’s the closest thing she can think of and Wynonna always keeps that man at arm’s length due to his infatuation with her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I’m picking up on that. Guess that makes her a good songwriter, too, huh?” Nicole says, looking at Wynonna with this expression that the brunette can’t quite place. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Smooth way of trying to get me to show you my songbook, Haughty.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“A girl’s gotta try…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly stays silent, darting her eyes back and forth between the two. They’re almost mirrors of each other. Wynonna smirks to one side and Nicole smirks to the other. Wynonna’s hands are shoved into the back pockets of her jeans. Nicole’s hands are shoved into the front pockets of hers. Standing across from one another… Waverly can’t help but think they look like they belong together. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oop! Look at the time. I should link up with the boys and get ready to take the stage…” Wynonna offers with a dismissive shrug. “See you on the other side.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna walks off and Waverly can’t help but notice the way Nicole tilts her head to the side to watch her saunter away. Wynonna’s light, ripped denim jeans have a rip just below her ass on the right side and Nicole can’t help but stare at the soft curvature. The fishnets under the jeans only make matters… </span>
  <em>
    <span>better. </span>
  </em>
  <span>When Nicole bites at her own bottom lip and her eyes drop, Waverly raises her eyebrow again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So… Nicole… How’d Wynonna rope you into coming to a show five days after meeting her?” Waverly fishes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Huh? Oh, she didn’t really rope me in. I was in the second she mentioned it. We spent hours talking at The Blue Door the other day and I was more than ready to see if she could live up to her own hype.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Hours talking at a coffee shop? With Wynonna? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Oh, Waverly’s going to have a </span>
  <em>
    <span>time </span>
  </em>
  <span>bugging Wynonna about that one later. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She’s pretty amazing… Music’s in our blood, so…” Waverly says casually. Surely in all of the hours of talking, their mother must have come up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole eyes Waverly curiously. “Is it? You a musician, too?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh poop, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly thinks to herself. How is it that Nicole doesn’t know who they are by now? Wynonna never shares that information freely, but Waverly had assumed… Instead of being the one to expose their famous lineage, Waverly just nods. “Mhm! I play piano and sing. I love singing the most, but I’ve been taking lessons my whole life on the keys. Wynonna likes to say I make the angels jealous when I sing. She’s just being sweet, though.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sweet, huh? Wouldn’t peg her for </span>
  <em>
    <span>sweet</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Nicole remarks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, she’s salty a </span>
  <em>
    <span>lot </span>
  </em>
  <span>more than she is sweet, that’s for sure! But she’s my big sister. She basically raised me, you know. She’s got that kind of motherly-slash-sisterly bias.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She raised you?” Nicole inquires. Part of her wants to ask more questions, but another, larger part of her realizes that prying into their personal lives would be both insensitive and intrusive. The last thing she wants to do is piss Wynonna off by pumping her little sister for information. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mhm! You know how parents can be!” Waverly answers carefully. This is Wynonna’s friend, not hers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole doesn’t get the chance to ask any more questions because the band takes the stage. Wynonna’s shed the jacket she was wearing and has on a white shirt that cuts off at her midriff. A deep green bra can be seen through the garment with how the stage lights shine on her. Is it possible for this woman to </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>look like she walked out of a fucking magazine?  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s deep cherry burst drum set suits her perfectly and Nicole can feel her body thrumming all over as Wynonna takes her seat on her stool. The woman looks at home behind the drums. From where she’s standing, Nicole can see that Wynonna’s sticks are worn and she has many on standby. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In one single instance, Nicole is ruined. Her jaw falls open at the way Wynonna’s arms flex and move with each beat of the drums. She does that stupidly hot thing where she spins the stick around her hands when she has a split second to do so. Her fingers spin the sticks and Nicole’s useless lesbian ass almost drools at the sight. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>About halfway through the set, sweat starts to drip off of Wynonna. That’s when Wynonna pulls the white shirt over her head and tosses it behind her, leaving her in just the green bra to continue her set. All of her deliciously exposed skin shines with beads of sweat. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna turns her head and finds Waverly and Nicole in the crowd, but her blue eyes settle on Nicole. Nicole becomes painfully aware of her dry mouth then, realizing that her mouth has been hanging open in amazement this entire time. Quickly, she closes her mouth and tries to produce extra saliva to soothe her predicament. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Chuckling, Wynonna smirks and shakes her head, turning back to the mic. “It’s fuckin’ hot in here… Why don’t I make it even hotter?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh no. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The opening beats and notes of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Do You Wanna Touch Me (Oh Yeah) </span>
  </em>
  <span>by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts sound through the room. Wynonna starts to sing and Nicole feels it low in her gut. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>We've been here too long</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Tryin' to get along</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Pretendin' that you're oh so shy</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I'm a natural ma'am</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Doin' all I can</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>My temperature is runnin' high</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole knows she’s delusional when she thinks Wynonna’s singing directly to her. Those eyes don’t seem to be moving away from her, though. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Do they? </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Cry at night</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>No one in sight</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>An' we got so much to share</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Talking's fine</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>If you got the time</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>But I ain't got the time to spare</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch (Yeah)</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch (Yeah)</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch me there, where</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch (Yeah)</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch (Yeah)</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch me there, where</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>There, yeah</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The crowd shouts every </span>
  <em>
    <span>yeah</span>
  </em>
  <span> with such conviction it makes Nicole burn inside. This crowd is lusting after Wynonna the same way Nicole is. The thought of Wynonna with anyone like </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> makes bile rise in her throat. The jealousy is absolutely ludicrous at this point. Wynonna’s giving these people exactly what they want. They’re eating it up. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It’s a show,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Nicole reminds herself. </span>
  <em>
    <span>You barely know this woman. Reign it in. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Every girl an' boy</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Needs a little joy</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>All you do is sit an' stare</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Beggin' on my knees</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Baby, won't you please</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Run your fingers through my hair</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna pouts pitifully as she sings </span>
  <em>
    <span>beggin’ on my knees, baby, won’t you please, </span>
  </em>
  <span>then scrunches her nose adorably sexily as she finishes the verse with </span>
  <em>
    <span>run your fingers through my hair. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>My, my, my</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Whiskey and rye</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Don't it make you feel so fine</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Right or wrong</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Don't it turn you on</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Can't you see we're wastin' time, yeah</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch (Yeah)</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch (Yeah)</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch me there, where</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch (Yeah)</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch (Yeah)</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Do you wanna touch me there, where</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>There, yeah</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The applause from the crowd is the loudest it’s been tonight and Nicole can’t blame them one bit. She’s late to join in--too busy staring dumbfounded at the absolute vision that is Wynonna. Waverly’s loud scream beside her makes her shake her head and finally start to clap and scream herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, you all look hot and bothered… Just like I like ya,” Wynonna teases with a wink. “But, I got something special I wanna do if that’s okay with you guys.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The crowd obliges with applause. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That sounds like a yes to me, boys. You cool?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, Wyn. Let’s get her up here,” the guitarist answers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Huh? </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I made a new friend this week…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>No…</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And she’s a guitarist…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole starts to shake her head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I asked what song she likes playing the most and she mentioned a fave of mine. How do you guys feel about a little Stevie Nicks, Tom Petty goodness?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Again, the crowd applauds. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Haughtpants, get your ass up here and sing with me!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly grins so widely, her eyes turn into crescent shapes. Not only has Wynonna never asked someone to come to her show, but she’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>definitely </span>
  </em>
  <span>never invited someone on stage with her. “Go, Nicole! Get up there!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s barely recovered and now she has to force herself to make her way to the edge of the stage. She hoists herself onto the stage, shaking her head at Wynonna. “I’m gonna kill you,” Nicole jests when she’s within earshot of Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna covers the mic with her hand and smirks. “You’re gonna show me what you got, Haughtstuff. Grab the guitar and be my Tom Petty.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole turns to see the guitarist holding a second guitar out for her. There’s no backing out now. Nicole slings the instrument over her shoulders and takes the pick from the man’s hand. When she steps up to the mic, it’s obvious why Wynonna had to strip her clothes off. It’s hot as hell up here. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, Wynonna, count us in…” she speaks lowly and smoothly into her microphone.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Magic. When Nicole starts playing the guitar alongside Wynonna’s drumming, it’s pure magic. Nicole feels her bones settle and everything feels </span>
  <em>
    <span>right. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She turns to search Wynonna’s face as they play the beginning of the song. There’s something in Wynonna’s eyes that Nicole hadn’t seen through the set until now. They’re here together. Nicole knows it. Wynonna knows it. They can both feel it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole watches as Wynonna sings the first lyrics of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around </span>
  </em>
  <span>by Stevie Nicks and Tom Petty. It almost pains the guitarist to turn away and approach the microphone to continue the song, but when she does… Their voices are perfectly suited. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The musical interlude hits and Wynonna keeps her beat perfectly as she watches Nicole’s fingers work perfectly over the strings of the guitar. If she can play someone else’s instrument this perfectly, Wynonna knows that she would be even better with her own axe. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As the song comes to an end, Wynonna and Nicole hold each other’s gaze. The thunderous sound of the applause is lost on them. It almost feels like they’ve escaped into a soundproof tunnel and all they can see or hear is each other. A few precious moments pass and Wynonna finally ducks her head down, breaking the spell. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck, </span>
  </em>
  <span>wasn’t that something?” Wynonna asks into her microphone. “Give it up for my Haughty!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>More thunderous noises from the room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright, we have a few more songs to play. Get outta here, Haught,” Wynonna teases. “Damn, she was something, wasn’t she?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole isn’t sure whether she’s blushing or whether she’s flushed and sweaty from their performance. Maybe, it’s a mixture of both. She hops down off the stage and finds Waverly again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Holy shit! That was-- You’re-- Oh my god!” Waverly can’t form complete thoughts as she tries to congratulate the new friend. “You and Wynonna should play together more!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah… That… That was…” Nicole is breathless, running her fingers through sweat-soaked hair. “That was pretty fucking awesome.” </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna finds Waverly and Nicole in the crowd, donning her leather jacket over her bra. Her white shirt must be stuffed somewhere. God, she looks sinful. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Haught… That was--” Wynonna starts, taking a deep breath. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, it definitely was,” Nicole agrees. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once again, Waverly’s left to </span>
  <em>
    <span>observe. </span>
  </em>
  <span>The younger Earp decides pretty quickly… </span>
  <em>
    <span>They’re definitely going to fuck after this. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, Wynonna, did you maybe wanna… Come by? I’m kinda buzzing after that and I think it’d be cool to… hang… if you want?” Nicole propositions gently. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s eyes rake over the woman, chewing lightly at her bottom lip. “Yeah, that sounds… good. Let me get Waves home. I’ll grab </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla</span>
  </em>
  <span> and you drop me your address?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole smiles too sweetly and nods. “Yeah, okay. I’ll see you in a bit?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“See you soon,” Wynonna replies more sweetly than Waverly’s accustomed to hearing her talk to anyone. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna shows up at Nicole’s place just short of an hour later, a little fresher and in a large </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fleetwood Mac </span>
  </em>
  <span>t-shirt and black shorts. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla </span>
  </em>
  <span>is tucked under one of her arms and she has a bottle of Jack in the other. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You a drinker?” Wynonna asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I can hold my own, I think,” Nicole replies slyly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hmm… We’ll see if you’re as good a drinker as you are a musician.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The next several hours are spent </span>
  <em>
    <span>existing. </span>
  </em>
  <span>They listen to </span>
  <em>
    <span>Layla </span>
  </em>
  <span>over and over. Wynonna doodles the album cover on a small piece of paper as they talk about music even more. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nic… Haught?” Wynonna asks when they fall into a comfortable silence. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, Wyn?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We should play together more… Like… A lot more.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah… We definitely should.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Maybe… With a bassist… and someone on keys… Maybe with Waves?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know a bassist,” Nicole comments. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna grins. “Of course, you fuckin’ do.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, of course, I do…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Everything is falling into place. Wynonna won’t say it just yet, but maybe, just </span>
  <em>
    <span>maybe, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she’s found her band--the one she’s dreamed about most of her life. And maybe… Maybe, she’s finally going to have a friend she can lean on. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>“Okay… so Wynonna and Nicole founded the band </span>
  <em>
    <span>together</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Got it.” Rosita smirks, her hands still resting together on the table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Did you even listen to anything we just said?” Wynonna asks, propping up her head with her hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole knocks Wynonna’s elbow out from under her which makes the brunette put that elbow right in Haught’s ribs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ow. Jerk.” Nicole winces, rubbing the place where the other woman had jabbed. “You’re just mad that I’m the one who started us and ––” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Haught. Shut the fuck up, dude. Let it go. It’s been more than two years. If I have to hear this argument one more fucking time,” Shae cuts in, glaring at the redhead from across the table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, Haughty. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Let it go,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Wynonna teases, bumping Nicole lightly with her elbow and smiling up at her sweetly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s embarrassing how red the cute expression gets Nicole’s cheeks to turn. The guitarist has to shake her head and roll her eyes, looking off to the side to try and hide the soft smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Whatever. Fuck you guys.” Nicole’s voice is soft and playful. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna is still looking at her best friend like she put the stars in the sky. Rosita wonders if she’s the only one who notices it, even if that seems impossible. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The way these two act… she can’t believe they’re not already a thing. Unless they are? Or used to be? She doesn’t have a clue yet. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Anyway, back to the meeting…” Shae reigns them in, leaning forward to look at Rosita. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly, however, has barely taken her eyes off of the manager since she sat down. Thankfully, she seems completely enamored with the band. Wynonna and Nicole’s flir–– </span>
  <em>
    <span>bickering</span>
  </em>
  <span> – hasn’t put her off any, at least not that Waverly can tell. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’s still looking at them with that softish smile. Waverly looks down to the way her hands are clasped. So many rings… and her fingers… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Next thing Waverly knows, Shae is nudging her arm. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What? Oh!” Waverly shakes her head, coming back to the moment. She’d been listening, even through her ogling. Her face burns as she tries to pretend she wasn’t thinking about Rosita. “Sorry, got lost… What’d you say?” Waverly finally speaks to Rosita again, looking up at her and smiling softly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The way Rosita’s smile grows makes Waverly ache. “I asked if you guys have an EP?” Rosita repeats sweetly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, right. Yeah, of course. I called in a favor with our mom and we--” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Waves, shut up,” Wynonna interrupts, shaking her head and rolling her eyes. The annoyance wafts off of her heavily. She sits up a little straighter, turning in her seat towards the manager. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes. We have an EP. We’ll get you some hard copies.” Wynonna sighs, trying to let go of the irritation that the mention of their mother had caused. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s arm across the back of Wynonna’s chair slips down around her shoulders, almost going unnoticed. The brunette relaxes at the touch, though, leaning into the guitarist more. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna doesn’t know if it will ever stop pissing her off that Waverly called their mother for that favor last year. The last thing she ever wanted was to have anything handed to her by that woman, especially when it came to their music. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s a double-edged sword. Wynonna knows they needed that EP and that they didn’t have the money to make it themselves, but she still wishes that it didn’t have to have anything to do with their mom. She’d hold that over them forever, Wynonna knows it in her bones. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita watches quietly, just nodding in agreement when Wynonna offers her the copies. She knows who Wynonna’s and Waverly’s mother is. It hadn’t taken long to figure out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Even though Michelle uses the last name ‘Gibson’, her career is </span>
  <em>
    <span>big</span>
  </em>
  <span>. She’s the first thing that comes up when either of the Earp girls are Googled. Rosita plans to change that. If Wynonna’s reaction to Waverly briefly mentioning their mom is any indication of their relationship with her, she doesn’t want them in her shadow any more than they want to be there. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita smiles brightly, looking at each of the women sitting in front of her. She doesn’t think she’s ever felt as hopeful about anything as she feels right now. </span>
  <em>
    <span>This is going to be so good,</span>
  </em>
  <span> she thinks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, guys… I– I have a </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> good feeling about this.” Rosita notices Wynonna’s face first. Her eyebrows raise and she sees her lips twitch slightly. It fuels her. “I’m serious. I can’t wait to see where this goes. What do you think about me coming up with a practice schedule and once I get my hands on the EP, I’ll start trying to get a good show together?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae’s smile widens then. She’d been the most intense and the one Rosita had been most worried about winning over, but right now she looks like she really believes her. Rosita hopes more than anything that she does. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sounds good.” Wynonna confirms softly, trying not to smile too big. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sounds </span>
  <em>
    <span>great</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Nicole says after, making the older woman fail at not smiling. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Rosita sends them an email the next day with a practice schedule all worked out. It’s the most organized thing Wynonna’s ever seen that didn’t come from the mind of her younger sister. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita has found them a consistent place to practice and it’s actually really nice. Way better than Wynonna and Waverly’s basement or practically having to beg the venues for extra time before their shows. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The best part? Not having to lug their shit in and out until they go for a show. Wynonna has always said that her least favorite part about being a drummer is that there’s too much shit to carry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna and Waverly show up early, much to Wynonna’s dismay.  She’s slugging down coffee and still wiping the sleep from her eyes when they walk into the rental studio. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s a beautiful space. Nothing huge, but it’s open and the natural light is incredible. The walls are painted a beautiful purple color that makes Waverly gasp. There’s not much furniture, just a sofa, a couple chairs and a coffee table. The rest of the space is occupied by their equipment. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, gosh. This place is so pretty!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s better than the basement, that’s for sure.” Wynonna responds. She’s not looking at the walls or the windows anymore, she’d seen them last night when she and Haught had brought in everyone’s gear. Now, her eyes are on the redhead in front of them, tuning her guitar. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mornin’, I smell my coffee,”  Nicole speaks up, looking up from her pedalboard and grinning. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna feels awake suddenly, like she doesn’t even need the caffeine in her hand. She raises the other cup she’s carrying and smirks at the taller woman. “Got it right here.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mmm… so sweet of you.” Nicole’s morning voice is still a bit raspy as she takes the coffee from Wynonna.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s an unspoken rule between them, they took turns bringing one another coffee. Of course, if it’s band practice, whoever stopped also brings coffee for everyone else… but that’s beside the point. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A couple of minutes later, Shae comes in and Waverly gives her the coffee they’d brought for her. It doesn’t take the band long to adjust to being in their new space. Truthfully, it feels a little bit surreal. Knowing that this place is </span>
  <em>
    <span>kind of</span>
  </em>
  <span> theirs, at least for now. That they have a manager. That none of it had come to them because of Michelle Gibson… it’s exhilarating. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s seated behind her drums, pounding out the rhythm of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Dreams</span>
  </em>
  <span> by Fleetwood Mac as she watches Nicole and Waverly talking in front of her and Shae plays along on her bass. Her eyes catch the door opening, but she doesn’t stop playing. Rosita steps into the room and everyone’s head turns towards her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Even though she looks the most casual of any time they’ve seen her – dressed in light high-waisted jeans, an old oversized Elvis t-shirt under her denim jacket, and black ankle boots – she still looks so put together. Her long hair is pulled up in a high ponytail and she’s got a couple of different sized gold chains around her neck. She’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>beautiful</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Heeyyy Rosita!” Waverly immediately speaks up, her voice high as she waves. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey, Waves. Hey girls.” Rosita smiles, addressing the others but keeping her eyes mostly on Waverly. The younger woman seems so cheerful and happy to see her, even this early. It makes her feel so warm. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Waves</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Nicole mouths to Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I know</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” The older woman mouths back, shaking her head and smiling with her tongue between her teeth. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You come to make sure we’re not wasting your time?” Wynonna says into her microphone, even though she doesn’t need to. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita blinks, laughing softly. “It’s a big day, your first practice. I just wanted to watch you guys again.” Rosita admits, coming around to the sofa and sitting down in the middle of it. She puts her bag down between her feet and pulls out her laptop, sitting back against the cushions. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When Rosita looks ahead, the group is standing behind their instruments just looking at her. Wynonna looks smug, Nicole and Shae look expectant, like they’re waiting for her to say something. Waverly just looks… </span>
  <em>
    <span> beautiful</span>
  </em>
  <span> and bright. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Guys… Just – do your thing. Pretend like I’m not even here, if you want.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah right, like Waves could ever.” Wynonna chuckles under her breath. Nicole hears it and shakes her head, stifling a laugh by taking a long drink of her coffee.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Since it’s your first time watching us practice, and you did such a good job getting us this place and everything, do you wanna pick the first song?” Waverly asks, chewing on her bottom lip as she waits for Rosita to answer. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna feels like her eyes are going to roll out of her head. She looks over at Shae who is already looking at her feet and shaking her head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I – uh… how about what Shae and Wyn were playing when I came in? Was it </span>
  <em>
    <span>Dreams</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Rosita finally suggests after a moment of thinking. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Damn right! Waves sounds so good on that song.” Wynonna teases, knowing that her sister’s face is getting red even if she can’t see it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The drummer looks over to Nicole who is already looking at her. She mouths a soft “</span>
  <em>
    <span>stop</span>
  </em>
  <span>” even though she’s grinning so big her dimples are on full display. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita pretends like she doesn’t notice the teasing and just hopes that it doesn’t bother Waverly. She sees the way the singer’s cheeks burn but it’s endearing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, let’s give the lady what she wants!” Wynonna says before counting them in and beginning the song. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s impossible not to notice the way Wynonna and Nicole vibe off of one another when it’s just the two of them playing the opening. There’s so much electricity between them. Rosita felt it that night at Twin Flame and she feels it again now. It’s even obvious when listening to their recorded music. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When Waverly’s voice fills the room, Rosita forgets all about the open laptop in her lap. She can’t pull her eyes away from the woman. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Voice of an angel</span>
  </em>
  <span>. God, they’d been so right that first night. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly goes from shy and red to completely sure and confident when she sings. All of their voices blend so smoothly. It’s like some switch flips. They all turn off their silly teasing and become this perfectly oiled machine. The manager is completely lost in what the band is making out of this already magical song. She’s sure that she’s never seen anything quite like this. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The chorus repeats twice more and the song finishes. When it’s over, the feeling lingers still. Rosita is on the edge of her seat. She claps slowly, giving them a brilliant smile that makes her cheeks do that </span>
  <em>
    <span>thing.</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s smile is just as big, it almost makes her eyes disappear. It seems like the joy goes all the way around. They all look so fucking pumped. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>An hour or so of practicing goes by and Rosita tries to get some work done on her computer while she listens and watches. Around 10:30, the band finishes running through a song that Wynonna and Waverly had recently written. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Holy shit…” Rosita’s voice is low, but the tone grabs all of their attention. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What? Did you hate it?” Wynonna pipes up, pulling her eyebrows together and spinning her sticks absentmindedly. </span>
</p>
<p><span>“Oh, I – </span><em><span>hell</span></em> <em><span>no</span></em><span>. It’s perfect! I just – I got an email about a gig.” Rosita is still looking intently at her laptop as she stands up, carrying it closer to them. “It looks like you guys are playing a big show this weekend.” Rosita beams, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth as she looks up from the screen. </span></p>
<p>
  <span>“How big is big?” Shae asks, setting down her instrument and stepping closer to Rosita. The rest of the band follows suit, and Rosita welcomes the four of them crowding around her to see. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This is the first time Rosita notices that Waverly, the shortest member of the band, is just the slightest bit taller than her. She smirks, keeping her eyes on her screen as the beautiful woman’s shoulder presses against her own. She kind of smells like cotton candy and Rosita makes herself take a deep breath. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Saturday night at Danforth Music Hall…” Nicole reads outloud. She’s the tallest, so she can just look over Rosita’s shoulder easily. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Opening for Julien Baker?!” Shae reads that part. Somehow, the email just keeps getting better. They’d opened for a few less known artists around the city before, but they’d never gotten paid much.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna has her arms wrapped around Nicole’s waist and her head leaning against the woman’s shoulder. She’s reading quietly to herself. Her eyes widen as she skims over the last few words of the email. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wait… a rep from Six Shooter is gonna be there?!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly turns her head to look at her sister, the excitement evident on her face. They’d grown up learning so much shit about the music world. The name of the record label is easily recognizable to her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna looks at her, taking one hand off of Haught to place it on Waverly’s shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Cool your jets, kid. Don’t get too excited yet.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?! Why not, Wyn? We should. We so should. No matter what happens with the label or whatever, it’s a really good gig.” Nicole looks down at her, grinning from ear to ear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s all Wynonna needs to really feel the excitement everyone else is vibrating with. She doesn’t want to be cynical or too cautious. Most of all, she doesn’t want to ruin this for Waverly. They </span>
  <em>
    <span>should </span>
  </em>
  <span>be excited. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Damn, you really did that, Rosita.” Shae laughs, nudging the shorter woman’s arm. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The band chats for a few more minutes and Rosita explains what logistics she can so early on. They go back and do a couple more songs before breaking for the day. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna lingers nearby and watches Nicole pack up her stuff. The redhead is so careful every time she puts away her guitar. Wynonna almost envies her gentleness and precision. She watches those long fingers tuck the red guitar pick between the strings and bites her lip. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“See something you like?” Nicole taunts, shutting her case and rising to her feet. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You wish.” Wynonna laughs, turning her back to the taller woman as they start making their way out the door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You have no idea how much I wish</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Nicole thinks, letting out a breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Did you really like that song? The new one… it’s mostly Waves, I just –” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It was perfect, ‘Nonna. They always are.” Nicole’s voice is gentle, and though what she’s saying sounds like flattery, it’s completely genuine. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna crosses her arms over her chest and smiles at the ground as they step outside into the sun. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly lingers by her keyboard even after the rest of her bandmates have stepped outside. The only other person left in the room is Rosita, off to the side talking to someone on her phone. Waverly does her best to seem busy, like she’s doing </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything</span>
  </em>
  <span> other than just waiting to talk to the older woman. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’s scribbling something down in her notebook when Rosita approaches her. Waverly does a double take, hurrying to finish and shut the book when she realizes Rosita is coming closer. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey, sorry, I wasn’t snooping.” Rosita offers, noticing the way Waverly almost scrambles. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No! Of course not! I didn’t think that you were, not at all!” The younger woman knows she’s over explaining but she can’t seem to stop. She stoops down and starts stuffing things back into her backpack. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita laughs softly, the tone of her voice makes it sound way sexier than she probably intends. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh god. </span>
  </em>
  <span>How is she ever supposed to be near this woman without blushing? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wynonna was right at the beginning, you know?” Rosita says, letting her fingers brush over the keys for a moment. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly looks up, eyes wide, and shoots to her feet. “What?! No… She wasn’t. I just – She’s just - my sister </span>
  <em>
    <span>likes</span>
  </em>
  <span> to embarrass me. It’s one of her favorite things, I think.” Waverly’s face is so red as she tries to explain away Wynonna’s insinuations. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita tilts her head to the side a bit, looking up just a little bit with her eyebrows raised. “I just meant about your voice. On that song. That you sounded really, </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> good.” Rosita says smoothly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly blanches, opening her mouth like she’s going to say something and then closing it again. “I – </span>
  <em>
    <span>oh</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Right. Riiiiight!” Waverly smiles, slinging her backpack over her shoulder. “Fleetwood Mac is more Wynonna’s thing, but that song is one of my favorites.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“My favorite is probably </span>
  <em>
    <span>Everywhere. </span>
  </em>
  <span>I don’t even have to tell you that you’d kill that one.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We’ve done that one before! Maybe we will again!” Waverly messes with one of her rings as she watches Rosita’s fingers brush against the keys. She bites her cheek, trying to calm the strange, bubbly feeling that rises up in her when she’s near their manager. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think a crowd would love that.” Rosita’s responses are always so cool, so sure. It makes Waverly feel even sillier, like she’s being weird. More than anything, she wants this cool, sexy woman to like her. Just in general. Something inside of her just aches to know Rosita. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“A crowd would love it?” Waverly asks.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>What about just you?</span>
  </em>
  <span> She thinks to herself. For a second, they’re just looking at each other. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yo! Baby sis! Let’s get a goddamn move on, I’m starving!” Wynonna pokes her head back in the door and yells, startling them both. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly blinks, straightening up again and clutching at her backpack strap. The door shuts again and Waverly tucks some stray hairs behind her ears, rubbing her hands together as she tries to gather up the courage to just say something normal. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you wanna come? With us to get something to eat? It could be like - like a ‘thank you’ for all this. Getting this together for us. Wanting to work with us.” Waverly sighs, relieved at the words she’s able to get out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita watches the younger woman speak and she can’t help but smile. But something sinks within her chest. She wants to say yes to Waverly so badly. Hell, if she’s being honest, she never wants to stop talking to her or being near her. It feels magnetic. But she knows it’s a terrible idea. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The manager takes a deep breath and lets her hand slide away from the keys, looking back to Waverly’s pretty green eyes. “I… wish I could. But I’ve got a meeting soon. That’s very sweet of you to ask, though. Maybe some other time,” Rosita offers, poking out her lips and scrunching up her nose a little as she tries to soften the blow. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s shoulders visibly sag, but she keeps her smile wide. It meets her eyes, so Rosita believes it. “That’s – that’s okay! Maybe some other time.” Waverly nods, agreeing. She tucks her pen behind her ear and heads off towards the door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Bye, Rosita!” Waverly turns around and waves over her shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Bye Waves.” Rosita smiles, watching the girl reach for the door. “Wait, Waverly?” Rosita calls out just before she steps outside. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly hopes the way she turns around doesn’t seem too abrupt. “Yeah?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You don’t have to thank me. You guys earned this,” Rosita assures. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The words make Waverly drop her head shyly, just before she nods and looks back at the older woman. She lets the door close behind her and smiles all the way to her Jeep. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. shadowboxing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Chasing Skylarks play the gig opening for Julien Baker. Rosita tries to get a better feel for the band's dynamic. Wynonna's ex shows up.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here's a link to the playlist: <a href="https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA">https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA</a>. Have fun figuring out which songs have emotional significance and which ones are merely covered/mentioned.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> January 25, 2020 </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The night of their first big gig arrives faster than any of them realize. Every night, Nicole spent extra time practicing every single one of their songs. Wynonna stayed behind and drummed along with her. Julien Baker is one of Nicole’s favorites.</p><p>It always amused Wynonna. If Nicole would stop for one second and look at herself the way Wynonna does, she would see that she’s just like Julien Baker--but in some ways, better. That thought might be a little influenced by the bias Wynonna holds in her heart. She thinks Nicole’s the best person there is. </p><p>Still, Wynonna practiced alongside Nicole every second to let her best friend know she would always be there with her. </p><p>Now, the band is sitting backstage getting ready in the same space as Julien. Wynonna sits in front of Waverly. Her younger sister insists on doing her makeup before every show, making sure to do it to Wynonna’s liking. Wynonna looks towards the floor as Waverly finishes up her eyeliner. </p><p>“You making me <em> Six Shooter </em>hot, Waves?” Wynonna jokes. </p><p>The younger Earp pauses for a second to study her sister. “Um… I think so! Do you-- Should I do something else? Oh god, did I forget something? I mean, you look--”</p><p>“Waves…” Wynonna interrupts reaching out and placing her hands on Waverly’s shoulders. “It was a joke. Besides… I’m always hot,” Wynonna says with a smug look and a shrug. She lets her hands fall back into her lap.</p><p>Nicole is a couple of feet away, checking herself in the mirror, and pushes out a laugh through her nose. </p><p>“Somethin’ funny over there, Haughtstuff?” </p><p>“Just laughin’ about how humble you are, Earp.” </p><p>“Look, I’m a shit person, but at least I’m hot, okay, let me have that.” </p><p>Nicole walks up behind her and places her hands on both of Wynonna’s shoulders and grips them tightly. “What have I told you about talkin’ shit about my best friend?” </p><p>“Remind me.” Wynonna throws her head back and looks up at Nicole with a soft smile. </p><p>“No one gives Wynonna Earp hell ‘cept me. Got it?” </p><p>Wynonna shakes her head. “Got it, Haught.”</p><p>Waverly watches the display with warmth spreading through her chest… As well as vast annoyance. They’ll never be together, she thinks. Wynonna’s too stubborn to open her heart to anyone--except her, her little sister. </p><p>Rosita observes them with a careful eye. </p><p>There’s a knock at the door a moment later. </p><p>“I’ve got it,” Rosita calls out, rising from her seat and going to open the door. “Guys, someone wants to wish you luck.” </p><p>All eyes from the band move to see who walks into their space. </p><p>“Holy shit,” Nicole whispers. Wynonna grins and lets her gaze remain on her best friend. </p><p>“Hey, guys,” Julien Baker greets with a short wave of her hand. “I’m Julien. Just wanted to stop by and say I’m stoked to have you guys opening the show. Think you’ll set the right tone…” </p><p>Nicole stands frozen in place. She had hoped to run into Julien, but she didn’t know that it was going to happen <em> before </em>they even went on. She can’t say anything. </p><p>Shae moves to her first, extending a hand to greet her. Julien takes it in both of hers and grins. “You’re Shae, the bassist. You’re fuckin’ sick on some of those riffs on your EP.” She pauses and turns to Nicole. “You, redhead…” </p><p>Nicole’s eyebrows shoot up and she nods. “Oh, uh, hi!” </p><p>“You’re the guitarist, yeah? And sing on some of the tracks?” </p><p>“Yeah, that’s me,” Nicole says, bringing her hand up to the back of her head. The cute smile on her lips makes her dimples show and Wynonna feels her heart pumping a little bit faster at the sight. </p><p>“You familiar with my songs?” Julien asks. </p><p>“Oh, definitely. I’m a big fan.” Nicole nods. An elbow in her abdomen jolts her to more awareness and she starts to walk over to the headliner. It’s at that moment she realizes that Julien is <em> tiny. </em>Nicole towers over the short woman and it relaxes her a bit. </p><p>“What’s your fave?” Julien asks. </p><p>“Fuck, uh, so many of them, but lately I think it’s <em> Shadowboxing,</em>” Nicole decides. </p><p>“Huh. I had that one on the setlist for tonight. What do you think about coming up to sing it tonight?” </p><p>The grin on Wynonna’s face widens. Waverly turns to her sister and mouths, <em> “Oh my god.” </em>Wynonna nods and turns back to watch the interaction continue to unfold. </p><p>“Wait?! Really?” Nicole can’t help her excitement. </p><p>Julien chuckles lightly. “Yeah, really. I like hearing other artists sing my songs. Plus, puts you in front of all the people who skip the openers for stupid ass reasons.” </p><p>It’s a sad truth in the industry and Nicole knows it. This way, the crowd would definitely be exposed to at least one of the voices of <em> Chasing Skylarks.  </em></p><p>“So… You in?” </p><p>Wynonna coughs, “Yes, you idiot.” </p><p>Nicole looks over her shoulder at the drummer. Her best friend nods expectedly. “Yeah, I’m in,” Nicole answers finally. “I’m in.” </p><p>“Alright, cool… See you on stage, then. You guys are gonna kill it. Nice to meet you guys. Waverly, Wynonna, right?” </p><p>The sisters nod. </p><p>“Too much damn talent in one group. Love it. Anyways, you guys are up soon, I’ll let you get ready.” </p><p>Rosita thanks Julien for stopping by and turns back to her band with a too-pleased look on her face. This is a dream come true. Julien Baker sees their potential just like she does. This gig could open even bigger doors for all of them. Rosita is <em> succeeding </em>just like she had felt she would the first time she heard them. </p><p>Shae grabs Nicole up in her arm and lifts the giant off the ground briefly. “You’re a fucking rockstar, Nic! I’m so proud of you.” </p><p>Nic shakes her head. Her eyes are glossed over and she looks like she’s in a daze. Wynonna can’t help the feeling creeping up in her chest. Everything is going <em> too well </em>and there’s an impending doom settling right next to it. She doesn’t get nice things. Not for long… Not without something imploding soon after. </p><p>“‘Nonna, what’s up?” Waverly asks. </p><p>“Nothin’, baby girl. Everything’s perfect, eh?” </p><p>“Yeah! Seems it!” </p><p>Rosita clears her throat. “Wynonna? Nicole? Can I talk to you guys in private?”</p><p>Wynonna blanches. There it is. This has to be some fucking bullshit. She just knows it. Nicole nods without thought. </p><p>The three of them step outside and find a secluded corner. </p><p>“What’s up, Rose?” Nicole asks, crossing her arms over her chest. </p><p>“Alright, I know this is personal and it’s none of my business. I’m not looking for an angle, I just want to know what I’m working with…”</p><p>“Spit it out, Bustillos,” Wynonna jokes, trying to smirk.</p><p>Rosita rolls her eyes and clears her throat. “Are the two of you… a thing?” </p><p>Wynonna laughs, but Nicole bites down hard, causing her jaw to jut out. She doesn’t say anything.</p><p>“A thing?” Wynonna asks. “No, we’re just friends. What the fuck?” </p><p>“Look, I’m not trying to judge. I just want to know the dynamic I’m dealing with. Relationships can complicate things, but-”</p><p>“We’re not together. Not like that. Haught’s my fuckin’ ride or die, for sure, but-- We’re not--”</p><p>“Yeah, we’re not dating,” Nicole finally manages. Her expression is unreadable. </p><p>Rosita looks up between the two of them over and over. “You guys can trust me. I just want to know how to protect you when--”</p><p>“Can you drop it? We’re not together,” Wynonna bites, trying to remember this woman is sort of her boss in a way at this point. More like someone who works for her, but someone she works with nonetheless. </p><p>“I’m sorry.” Rosita raises her hands in surrender. “I was just asking…” After another moment passes, she asks, “Are you two aware of the following the two of you have online?”</p><p>“Huh?” Wynonna asks. </p><p>“People ship us, Wynonna,” Nicole says. “They call us ‘Wynhaught.'” </p><p>Wynonna turns to her best friend now, mouth hanging open. “Wine… hot? What the fuck that’s so lame? Redwyn is <em> right there</em>. These people need help.”</p><p>“You really didn’t know?” Rosita asks, eyebrow raised. </p><p>“No…” Wynonna replies like the answer is obvious. </p><p>“Don’t you ever google yourself?” Nicole jests. </p><p>“Y’know, I do everything in my fuckin’ power not to do that, Haughty. It’s been a nightmare since--” Wynonna stops, but both Rosita and Nicole know what she’s going to say. Neither one of them pushes the issue. </p><p>Nicole shifts and speaks up next, “Okay, but like if we-- or anyone in the band… dated each other, would you have a problem with that?”</p><p>Wynonna snaps her head up to Nicole and pulls her eyebrows together. She brings a pointed finger up and pokes Nicole hard in the chest. “Who you tryin’ to date, Haughtpants? Fuck, do you have a thing for Waverly?”</p><p>Nicole flinches. “Ow! Fuck, it was just a hypothetical question…”</p><p>Hearing Waverly’s name mentioned in this hypothetical makes Rosita’s arms burn. The thought of Waverly dating anyone makes her stomach churn. It shouldn’t. <em> It can’t, </em>Rosita reminds herself. Her stomach churns just the same. </p><p>The tallest woman looks down at their manager, expectantly, waiting for the answer. </p><p>“Are you kidding?” Rosita finally chimes in, laughing lightly. “Bandcest happens in basically every band. If… something were to happen, it’s not a problem for me--as long as it doesn’t become an issue that affects the band.”</p><p>Nicole nods, cutting her eyes down at Wynonna who is still eyeing her suspiciously. </p><p><em> She can’t be… </em>Wynonna swallows the knot forming in her throat. </p><p>“Alright, showtime’s coming. Go link back up with Waves and Shae. Do your thing,” Rosita breaks the tension. (She hopes.)</p><hr/><p>Rosita enters the room a while later after making a few calls and replying to emails, trying to cement a few more things for the band. </p><p>“Where’s Waverly?” she asks the three women sitting together. </p><p>“Had to go to the bathroom,” Wynonna says with a shrug. </p><p>“It’s almost time to go…” </p><p>“Yeah, well nature calls, y’know?” Wynonna can’t help the look of amusement that shines in her eyes at the special concern for her sister from the manager. </p><p>“I’m going to go check on her,” Rosita says before leaving the room without waiting for a reply. </p><p>“Oh, I bet you are,” Wynonna murmurs under her breath. A moment later, she feels a soft impact against her bicep. <em> Nicole. </em>“What? Oh c’mon! Could those two get any more obvious?” </p><p>Shae looks to Wynonna, then to Nicole, then back to Wynonna. “Oh, I think they can,” the bassist replies. “Besides, Rosita’s just doing her job. <em> Managing </em>us?” </p><p>“Uh huh, sure… ‘Managing’ Waverly. Is that what the kids call it these days?”</p><p>“You’re fucking impossible. Why do we like you again?” Shae asks. </p><p>“You loooove me, Pressman. You love me,” Wynonna teases. </p><p>“Haught might love you, but I tolerate you.”</p><p>“Ouch!” Wynonna puts both hands over her heart. “Hit me where it hurts.” </p><hr/><p>Rosita approaches the bathroom nearby and enters the multi-stall room. Waverly’s standing over a sink and staring at herself in the mirror. </p><p>“Waves?” </p><p>The younger woman follows the sound of the voice and straightens at the sight of their manager. “Hi.” </p><p>“You okay?” Rosita asks, moving forward until she’s leaning against the counter beside Waverly. </p><p>Their proximity makes it hard for Waverly to breathe one moment and in the next, she lets the comfort Rosita radiates wash over her. “Hm? Oh totally! Totally… okay…” Waverly replies unconvincingly. </p><p>“What are you thinking?” Rosita asks, clearly not buying her lies. </p><p>Waverly curses herself for not being able to ever sell a lie. It’s one of the most annoying traits she has. “I’m just-- nervous?”</p><p>“That’s normal,” Rosita assures her, reaching out and placing her hand over one of Waverly’s resting against the counter. “But, you’re amazing. <em> Voice of an angel</em>, remember?” </p><p>Both of their gazes move to their hands. Waverly fights the urge to flip hers over and link their fingers. The touch is calming. She can’t deny that. “Yeah, I guess,” Waverly says, breathing hard on the last word. “It’s just-- This is like… Everything is coming together and we have you--our amazing manager. This gig could-- Be huge. This is Wynonna’s dream! And I don’t want to fuck it up, you know? Wynonna’s been dreaming about stuff like this her whole life and I--”</p><p>“Hey,” Rosita calls softly. She moves to turn Waverly to fully face her, each of her hands on either of Waverly’s biceps. “You. Are. Going. To. Be. Perfect.” Each word is spoken evenly and slowly.</p><p>It gives Waverly time to soak them in. She sucks in a deep breath through her nose and lets it release through her mouth. Her lips curve up in the sweetest smile Rosita has ever seen. </p><p>“Tell me what always gets you ready before a show,” Rosita says, trying to redirect Waverly’s thoughts. </p><p>“Being with the girls… Wynonna goofing off and being an asshole… Listening to Harry Styles…” Waverly starts to name a few things. Rosita listens attentively and carefully. This woman is unlike any of the managers Waverly’s ever heard about. She actually <em> cares </em> about them as individuals--as people. She doesn’t see them as assets or resources to make money. </p><p>“So… Wanna tell me why you’re in here and not in there with them, with Harry blasting over the radio?” </p><p>Waverly scrunches her nose. “I don’t know. I didn’t want-- I didn’t want Wynonna to think I was going to choke.” </p><p>“Would Wynonna think that?” </p><p>“Probably not.” </p><p>“She wasn’t worried about you. I think she has a lot more faith in you than you know,” Rosita explains. </p><p>“But you were worried about me?” Waverly asks, taking the side of her bottom lip between her teeth and ducking her head to look up at Rosita through her lashes. </p><p>The expression threatens to unravel all of Rosita’s guarded hesitations. Her eyes flick to Waverly’s lips and then back to her green eyes. She shrugs. “Call it manager’s intuition.”</p><p>Waverly looks down at her feet and shakes her head. This is bad. <em> This is so bad. </em>She’s falling for their fucking manager and she knows she shouldn’t. </p><p><em> Why not? </em> A voice asks her. She doesn’t have an answer. She doesn’t really know why she shouldn’t. She doesn’t give a shit that Rosita is their manager. </p><p>“Whatever it is… I’m glad for it,” Waverly says, bringing her eyes back up to Rosita. </p><p>“Good. Now, go back to the girls… And remember that you’re going to be <em> amazing. </em>Because I fucking said so. Okay?” </p><p>Waverly nods cutely. “Okay.” </p><hr/><p>This is their largest audience yet. They knew that before ever setting foot on the stage, but looking out and <em> seeing it </em> is another story. There are so many people. Most of them probably have no damn clue who they are. Their following is small. No one is there for <em> them. </em>It’s never the case with openers. It comforts Nicole to know that their target demo is the same. </p><p>A crowd full of young queer people would love them. She knows it. They open with the same number as when Rosita saw them. <em> If it isn’t broken, don’t fix it.  </em></p><p>They keep covers to a minimum of <em> one </em> (Waverly sings <em> Everywhere </em> by Fleetwood Mac… definitely <em> not </em> for Rosita). With the record label present, Rosita insists they choose only one cover. The label needs to hear what <em> they </em>have to offer--not their interpretation of someone else’s songs. Being in a cover band for so long, Wynonna backs Rosita’s case up. </p><p>She’s glad for it. Playing their own songs for a full set makes them shine in a way none of them could anticipate. They all thought their show at The Twin Flame had been perfect… This one feels even better. </p><p>“We’re about to sing our last song of the night, so I say we go out with a bang,” Nicole says, filling the space before their ultimate song.</p><p>“Ooh… You’d love if we banged, wouldn’t you, Haughty?” Wynonna teases. </p><p>“Alright, keep it in your pants, Earp,” Shae offers with a shake of her head. </p><p>“Hey, Haught’s the one talking about banging, not me… Pretty rich, huh?” Wynonna teases again, kicking the bass drum a few times. </p><p>“Okay, okay,” Waverly speaks next. She smiles before looking out into the vast crowd. “Can’t take us anywhere…” </p><p>“Mainly, Wynonna,” Nicole adds, looking over her shoulder at the drummer behind her. </p><p>“You guys have been an amazing crowd!” Waverly says again. “This last song… is for you all!” </p><hr/><p>Off-stage, Nicole comes up behind Wynonna and wraps her arms around her and squeezes. “You do shit like that and wonder why people <em> ship </em>us?” </p><p>“Look, I know what hooks people. What they don’t know, won’t hurt ‘em. Let ‘em think what they wanna think,” Wynonna shrugs. Her hands come up to rest on Nicole’s forearms around her chest. </p><p>“Wynonna!” A voice calls. </p><p>Both of them find the owner of the voice. Wynonna brightens. Nicole tightens her embrace when she lays eyes on her. </p><p><em> Alex Vice. </em> The woman grinning so brightly at them is Wynonna Earp’s hot ex-girlfriend turned close friend. Nicole still can’t believe Wynonna broke up with this woman. She can’t believe even more that they’re still friends since Alex had apparently been <em> in love </em>with Wynonna when they were together. Wynonna ‘couldn’t’ be in love, so she broke it off before she hurt Alex more than she had to.</p><p>Nicole prays every day that it’s a lie--that Wynonna could be in love… And would be one day. <em> With her.  </em></p><p>“Alex! Fuck, you made it! I thought you said you had to bail?” Wynonna doesn’t make a move to get out of Nicole’s embrace. <em> That’s something, </em>Nicole thinks. </p><p>“Thought it’d be more fun to see that look on your face. Plus, I didn’t want you to fucking choke knowing I was out there watching.” </p><p>“Oh, fuck <em> you. </em> You cocky piece of shit. Like <em> you </em> of all people could make <em> me </em>choke.” </p><p>“Hey, Alex,” Nicole tries to sound more friendly than she feels. </p><p>“Hey, Nicole!” Alex is as bright as she can be. “You fucking killed it tonight.”</p><p>“Oh, thanks,” Nicole says softly. </p><p>“And she’s gonna kill it later. Julien invited her to sing one of her songs during her set.”</p><p>“No <em> fucking </em>way!” Alex jumps a little bit. “This is huge! Next thing you know, she’s gonna be trying to steal you for boygenius.” </p><p>“Yeah, right…” </p><p>Wynonna pushes back into Nicole and squeezes her hands over her arms. “You better not bail for some supergroup… No matter how tempting it will be when she definitely tries to steal you from me-- us,” she corrects a moment later. </p><p>Alex tries to stifle her smirk and fails. </p><p>“Alright, let’s go watch the show,” Wynonna says. Nicole finally releases her but keeps one arm slung over Wynonna’s shoulders. Alex follows them to the part of the floor designated for them to enjoy the show. </p><hr/><p>“For my next song, I want to bring someone back on the stage. From <em> Chasing Skylarks, </em>please welcome Nicole Haught back to the stage!” Julien announces. </p><p>Nicole hates to leave Wynonna alone with Alex and kicks herself for even thinking like that. It’s <em> gross. </em>Wynonna can be alone with anyone she wants. But, this is an opportunity of a lifetime. Wynonna brings Nicole in for a hug and puts her mouth right against Nicole’s ear. “You’ve got this, Nic. Go kick some ass.” </p><p>It eases Nicole’s rampant mind. As she takes the stage, every single one of their group--Alex included--let loose with loud screams and applause. Alex has only ever been kind to her. Then again, as far as Alex knows… She’s just <em> the best friend.  </em></p><p>Little does Nicole know, Alex <em> knows. </em>And she understands. Even more, she wants Wynonna to have what she deserves. </p><p>Nicole takes her place behind the microphone Julien designates for her. The opening notes of <em> Shadowboxing </em>by Julien Baker start and a few moments later, Nicole is making the song her bitch. </p><p><em> Born cutting teeth on the curb </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Summoning ghosts up from the concrete </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Keep me company while I learn </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Shadowboxing with giants </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Grew from our feet </em></p><p><em> I know that you don't understand </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> 'Cause you don't believe what you don't see </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> When you watch me throwing punches at the devil </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> It just looks like I'm fighting with me </em></p><p><em> But there's a comfort in failure </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Singing too loud in church </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Screaming my fears into speakers </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> 'Till I collapse or I burst </em></p><p><em> Whichever comes first </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> I know you were trying to help </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> But you're only making it worse </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Tell me that I shouldn't blame myself </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> But you can't even imagine how badly it hurts </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Just to think sometimes </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> How I think almost all the time </em></p><p><em> So break me down </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Fold it over your arms </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Like an unloaded shotgun </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Dismantled and harmless </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Even you couldn't manage to pull </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> The fuse from the back of my head </em></p><p>Through the last verse, Nicole turns to find Wynonna where she knows the woman stands. There are lights that make it hard to see, but Nicole could see Wynonna in complete darkness. She sings with such raw emotion, Wynonna forgets to breathe. </p><p><em> When you tell me you love me </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Tell me you loved me </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> I wanted so bad to believe it </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> So tell me you love me </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> Tell me you loved me </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> I wanted so bad </em> <em> <br/></em> <em> I wanted so bad to believe you </em></p><p>Before Julien can even speak, the audience gives Nicole every bit of the praise she deserves. </p><p>“Damn, maybe I should give that song over to <em> Chasing Skylarks</em>,” Julien jokes. </p><p>Nicole ducks her head and flashes that stupid grin with the her dimples at their deepest. </p><p>“Nicole Haught, everyone!” Julien speaks again. There’s more applause and Nicole takes this as her time to exit. </p><hr/><p>Alex stands with the band as they go to get in their cars and drive home. </p><p>“Shit, we have so much to catch up on, Wyn,” Alex says.</p><p>“Why don’t you come over tonight and get me caught up then?” Wynonna offers casually. </p><p>Nicole feels sick. </p><p>“Okay, sure, yeah! I’ll meet you at your place?” </p><p>“Mhm. See you there, Lex.” </p><p>Alex walks away and Nicole tries to swallow the bile in her throat. </p><hr/><p>“So…” Alex starts, lying back against the headboard of Wynonna’s bed. “When are you finally gonna mount the hot redhead?” </p><p>Wynonna pulls a pillow out from behind Alex and brings it down in a hard smack against her face. “The fuck, Alex?” </p><p>Alex snatches the pillow from Wynonna’s grasp and hits her back with it. “Come the fuck on, Wynonna! It’s been <em> three </em> years. She’s still got those fucking puppy dog eyes for you and <em> haaaates </em>it when I show up. Even though I couldn’t be more over your ass.” </p><p>“No one gets over my <em> ass, </em>” Wynonna deflects. </p><p>“I’m not letting you brush this off, bitch.” </p><p>“You are, though. Nothing’s gonna happen between me and Nic. It can’t.”</p><p>Alex sits up straighter, leaning forward and bringing her legs to criss-cross under her. “Why the hell not?” </p><p>A long, heavy sigh expels from Wynonna. “I wish people would stop fucking acting like I can’t just have a friend without screwing them.” </p><p>Alex raises an eyebrow.</p><p>“Shut the fuck up. I know-- I know that I don’t have a good track record, but I almost screwed everything up with you, didn’t I? I thought you’d never talk to me again for a while and that-- That would have sucked.” </p><p>Alex listens closely, eyeing her friend with sympathetic eyes. “You could be missing out on something, Wyn.” </p><p>“No. I’m not. I’m not missing out on shit. I’m keeping Haught where I need her. <em> Here. </em> I’m not fucking it up by climbing in bed with her. I don’t <em> do </em>feelings. Haught’s nothin’ but feelings. And I love that about her, but I’m not fucking her up with all my shit.” </p><p>There’s a few beats of silence between them. Alex watches Wynonna carefully. It took Alex a long time to be able to read Wynonna--and sometimes, she still gets it wrong. Most of the time, she still gets it wrong. It’s how she knows they were never meant to be. </p><p><em> Does Nicole ever get it wrong? </em>Alex finds herself thinking. She believes she knows the answer. </p><p>Still… </p><p>“Fine, Wyn. I’ll drop it,” Alex concedes. </p><p>“Thank <em> fuck </em>. I get enough of that from Waves. Nic’s just waiting for the right person to come along. It’s not me. It’ll never be me,” Wynonna says. Despite her best efforts, Alex can feel the deep sadness in every word. She can also feel that Wynonna believes every single one of them with her whole being. It’s heart-shattering. </p><p>“I’m fucking wiped,” Wynonna speaks again. “I’m glad you came over. I miss you, dude.” </p><p>“Yeah, Wyn, I miss you, too, you asshole.” </p><p>“Don’t be a stranger, then.” </p><p>“Sorry, not all of us have sexy managers to get our gigs for us,” Alex teases. </p><p>“Hey, Rosita’s off-limits. Waves is <em> soooo </em>into her. Even if that’s a trainwreck waiting to happen.” </p><p>“Waves is into your manager?” </p><p>“Yep. Welcome to the drama of <em> Chasing Skylarks.” </em></p><p>“Whew, soooo glad I dodged that bullet.” </p><p>“Shut up and go to sleep.” </p><p>“Night, Wyn.” </p><p>“Night, Lex.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. if you were my love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Wynonna wakes from nightmares and seeks comfort. We flashback to Nicole and Wynonna attending a Stevie Nicks concert.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>January 26, 2020 </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>One minute, they’re laughing and the radio is playing. The next, every other sound is snuffed out by crunching, twisting metal and shattering glass. All the windows burst as the car flips and flips. Wynonna can smell the metal getting hot as the car skids across the asphalt, upside down. She can smell the blood. Her own and everyone else's. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her tiny, twelve year old hands are shaking as she fights with her seatbelt, trying to get out of it. Trying to get out of the burning car. Everything is dark and the blood in her eyes doesn’t help. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Waverly</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Where’s Waverly? The fire starts near the front of the car, they don’t have a lot of time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Help, ‘Nonna!” Wynonna can hear her younger sister but she can’t see her. Why can’t she see her? Oh, god… </span>
  <em>
    <span>what if she can’t get to her? </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna jolts awake, her lungs begging for air. She feels like clawing at her throat, anything to get air in. She sits up in her bed and the room is quiet. Too quiet. Her ears are ringing. The first noise she notices is the ceiling fan. It makes a few of the posters on the walls tremble lightly, creating a soft noise. The rest of the sounds start to come back slowly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna can feel and hear her heart pounding in her ears, she rests her head against her knees. Breathing. Just breathing, in and out. She’s doing it. She’s alive. It’s just another fucked up nightmare. One of the best nights of her fucking life and even that doesn’t stop the dreams from plaguing her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Looking to her left, Wynonna sees the sleeping body next to her. Alex is still there and thankfully, she hasn’t disturbed her. The older woman takes a deep breath, rubbing her shaking hands over her face and up through her hair. The pieces near her forehead are damp with sweat. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She notices for the first time how a thin sheen of it seems to cover her body. She feels cold, but she pushes herself up from the bed anyway. Wynonna pulls her long, messy hair up into a bun and sheds her sweat soaked t-shirt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As much as she hates it, she pretty much needs her glasses to see in the dark. She fumbles to the desk and feels around until the cool plastic touches her fingers. Wynonna shoves them into place and blows a stray strand of hair out of her face. She moves back to the dresser and pulls out whatever t-shirt and jeans her hands find first. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna tosses a few more things into her backpack and throws it over her shoulder. She kneels down and grabs Stevie’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>Bella Donna</span>
  </em>
  <span> album from one of the record crates on her floor. Tucking it under her arm, she picks up her boots with the other hand, deciding to put them on outside the bedroom. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She chances a glance back to her bed. Alex is curled up and breathing evenly. Wynonna watches for a couple of seconds, before convincing herself that the younger woman won’t think she’s an asshole for leaving. She lets out a long breath and steps out of her room, pulling the door closed to a crack behind her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna pads softly to Waverly’s door, still just in her socks. She pushes the door open as quietly as she can, praying that it won’t wake her sister up. The wooden door gives an eerie creak and Wynonna winces. Waverly shifts in bed, but doesn’t wake up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna lets out another breath, deeper this time. One she didn’t realize she’d been holding. The weight of her nightmare has lifted a bit, seeing her baby sister okay and in her bed, but some of the heaviness remains. She knows only one thing will help. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She slips into her boots and grabs her keys, leaving quietly out the front door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The drive to Haught’s isn’t long, especially not at 4AM. There’s barely anybody on the road. Wynonna puts </span>
  <em>
    <span>Shadowboxing </span>
  </em>
  <span>on repeat while she drives. She can’t stop thinking about Nicole singing that fucking song up there in front of all those people. The pride that swells within her makes her ache. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>So tell me you love me </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Tell me you loved me </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I wanted so bad</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I wanted so bad to believe you </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The words echo over and over again. Wynonna doesn’t even hear Julien’s voice. It’s just Nicole. She doesn’t even realize she’s crying until she pulls into one of the visitor spots in Haught’s apartment complex parking lot and sees herself in the mirror. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’d forgotten to turn on the heat, so her hands are cold when she takes them off the steering wheel. It almost hurts to flex her fingers. Wynonna wipes at the tears on her numb cheeks with the back of a ringed finger. She closes her eyes and leans her head back against the seat, taking a few deep breaths before she gets out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Three sharp knocks on Haught’s door. It only takes a few minutes for Nicole to answer. The redhead is still rubbing her eyes when she opens the door. Standing there in her purple raccoon print boy-shorts and a yellow Hufflepuff Quidditch t-shirt that Wynonna gave her for one of her birthdays, she looks… </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking adorable</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna feels herself soften, calm already washing over her just by being in Nicole’s presence.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nice panties, Red.” Wynonna reaches out and tugs the elastic waistband, letting it snap back against her body.   </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ow?” Nicole smacks her hand away. “They’re not… </span>
  <em>
    <span>panties</span>
  </em>
  <span>. What are you even doing?” Nicole’s voice is thick with sleep, but it cuts through to Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She feels like she’s looking at a ghost. Nicole hadn’t expected to see Wynonna tonight, certainly not outside her apartment looking like this. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The Maleficent t-shirt she’s wearing is so big it ends right in the middle of her thighs and the porch light shines off of Wynonna’s glasses. She looks so </span>
  <em>
    <span>pretty</span>
  </em>
  <span>, even in the middle of the night, after doing god knows what with… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna shakes her head, laughing a bit. That was… </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>the reaction she expected. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Bad dream. Couldn’t sleep. You said it was cool that I didn’t call before so I just…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, it is… it is… I just… didn’t Alex go home with you?” Nicole crosses her arms, leaning into the doorframe. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna starts to feel jittery, like she might have misread something. Is being here a mistake? She narrows her eyes, looking up at the taller woman and shaking her head a bit. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah? What about it?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re here? And she’s still there?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We just… hung out after the show? She’s asleep. We were both </span>
  <em>
    <span>just </span>
  </em>
  <span>sleeping before I… woke up.” Wynonna doesn’t know why she feels the need to reassure her that nothing had happened between her and her ex, but she does. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, you just left her there?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“God, what the fuck is this? Twenty questions? Yeah? I just left her there… she’ll be fine. What’s the deal, Haught?” Wynonna laughs, but there’s not much humor in the sound. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why didn’t you just wake </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span> up?” Nicole feels the pinpricks of jealousy all through her chest as she asks Wynonna the questions. When she saw them leave the show together she really thought… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Damn… alright, I can just go back home?” Wynonna says, sounding dejected. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’s about to turn around and head back, but Nicole grabs her by the wrist.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Get your ass in here, Earp.”  The sudden movement makes the record Wynonna is carrying under her arm slip slightly, but she catches it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck, Haught. You almost made me drop Stevie.” Some of the sadness lifts from Wynonna’s voice. Just some. She presses the vinyl into Nicole’s chest, forcing her to take it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole smiles softly, looking at the old record in her hands. The edges of the cover of Stevie Nicks’ </span>
  <em>
    <span>Bella Donna </span>
  </em>
  <span>album are worn, but Nicole knows that the record itself still works fine. Wynonna’s taken good care of this thing over the years. It’s the same one she brings every time she shows up at Nicole’s like this. Nicole has held this album in her hands more times than she can count. The tall woman holds the record against her chest and turns to follow Wynonna into the apartment and out of the cold. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>Wynonna takes the familiar route to Nicole’s bedroom and a sense of peace washes over her. The room is like a small sanctuary. Every inch of it is filled with the smell of Wynonna’s favorite person. The posters of Johnny Cash, Tomb Raider and other shit Nicole loves are tacked neatly to the walls. The window is open just a little bit, letting the fresh night air cool the room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna loses her backpack and boots, strips out of her jeans and makes herself at home in Nicole’s bed. Amid the faded yellow, flannel comforter and pillows and the white and blue pinstripe sheets, Wynonna feels like she’s home. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s bed is the most comfortable bed Wynonna’s ever been in. She knows this probably has more to do with it being </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole’s</span>
  </em>
  <span> than anything else but she won’t ever say that. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole smirks and softens completely as she watches Wynonna settle into her bed. The smaller woman takes out her phone and types something. A message for Waverly, maybe one for Alex, Nicole assumes. The thought makes her swallow hard. </span>
  <em>
    <span>They’re just friends</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Nicole reminds herself. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Just like the two of you.</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s throat suddenly feels constricted. She clears it and moves to put the record on. She knows that Wynonna will probably be asleep again before the first side is finished playing. The opening note of the title track fills the room and Nicole takes herself back to the bed, settling in and pulling the sheets up around the two of them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She steals a glance of Wynonna taking her hair down and removing her glasses, putting them on the bedside table with her phone. It makes Nicole smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What, Haughty?” Wynonna catches her, turning and settling against her side. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothin’, just your glasses. You don’t wear ‘em like you should.” Nicole tries to sound like she’s being helpful, and, in a way, she is, but mostly… she thinks Wynonna looks cute. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole rests with the arm closest to Wynonna behind her own head and the other draped over her belly. When Wynonna lays beside her, she rests her arm across Nicole’s belly, too. Wynonna’s head rests on Nicole’s chest and when she breathes, she pulls the smell of her best friend deep into her lungs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Whatever, I wear them when I need to.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Which is never?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Which is… most of the time at night. Just because you don’t see me wearing them, doesn’t mean I don’t.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, yeah…” Nicole chuckles lightly, sighing. “You wanna talk about your dream?” Her voice is softer when she begs this question, knowing the answer she’ll probably get. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s black fingernails contrast against the yellow of Nicole’s shirt as she balls her fist. Nicole’s arm drops to wrap around Wynonna’s shoulders, holding her against her side. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You don’t have to.” Nicole reminds softly, her voice barely more than a whisper. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know I don’t.” Wynonna answers truthfully. Nicole never asks Wynonna to give anything she doesn’t want to give. Nicole never pushes. Nicole is always there. She knows just what to say to make it feel okay. To make it better. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually, Wynonna’s fist unclenches and she smoothes the wrinkles she made in the shirt over Nicole’s abdomen. The touch makes Nicole’s breath catch, but she hopes it isn’t obvious. Having Wynonna like this feels like the greatest gift each time she gets it. Once again, she can pretend. She can hope. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It was the same shit, you know? Same dumb dream. About the accident. The one where – where I can’t find Waverly. Where I don’t save her. ‘Cept this time I–I  woke up before…” Wynonna starts to explain and trails off, sounding like she’s choking a little. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s hand smoothes over her back and her arm without thinking. The motions aim to soothe, trying to help fight off the bad thoughts and emotions she knows Wynonna must be feeling. She nods, not saying anything. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s never been in a car accident or watched her father and sister die, but she did survive a forest fire that killed a bunch of people at a music festival she was attending as a kid. Sometimes she still has nightmares about that, but mostly, she doesn’t remember it. Nicole knows that’s probably why Wynonna comes to her when the bad dreams happen. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna has told Nicole more than she’s ever told anyone else about the accident. About</span>
  <em>
    <span> anything </span>
  </em>
  <span>really. Nicole is her best friend for a reason. In all her life, she’d never called anyone else that. Nobody besides Waverly even comes close. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sure, now she has Alex, who she cares a lot about, but even she doesn’t hold a candle to Nicole. Wynonna wonders if Nicole knows that. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Really </span>
  </em>
  <span>knows it. She can’t make herself say it, especially not now, so she just snuggles closer into Nicole’s warm body. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Their bare thighs brush underneath the sheets and Wynonna’s feet feel like ice when they touch Nicole’s long legs. Nicole lets them. Any touch from Wynonna will always do. Nicole feels more than lucky to have these little moments.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They rest in silence as the album plays. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Kind of Woman</span>
  </em>
  <span> makes Wynonna’s chest ache in a way she never, ever talks about. The words hit too close to the way she feels right now, lying in Nicole’s arms.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I promised myself a long time ago, </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>It would be difficult to let you go </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>If not at least within </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>The touch of my fingers </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>It was close to being </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>In heaven </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Kind of woman that’ll haunt you</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna finds herself fiddling with the edge of Nicole’s t-shirt. A string has frayed and she’s playing with it, not pulling or picking. Her mind is busy, far away from the shirt or the string. It’s stuck in a loop. The words from this song. The feeling Haught puts in her chest. The way she </span>
  <em>
    <span>shouldn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> feel that way because she knows it will ruin everything. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She knows she can’t lose Nicole. She knew it the day she met her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>This… moments like these. It’s the closest to that Heaven that you’ll ever, ever get</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she reminds herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Remember when we saw Stevie?” Nicole asks, breaking the silence. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna can hear the smile on her lips. It makes the corner of Wynonna’s mouth tug upwards and she nods. “How could I ever forget? But… could you tell me about it again?” Wynonna asks softly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She doesn’t know how many times she’s asked to hear the redhead recount the night they’d had last year even in the few short months in between, but Nicole always obliges. The taller woman tightens her arm around Wynonna slightly, settling more comfortably into the bed. Wynonna adjusts accordingly, keeping herself nestled right where she wants to be. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s long fingers start playing in Wynonna’s hair, running through it gently as she tells the story from its beginning. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>September 3, 2019</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna is sitting at the piano in their basement, working on the lyrics to a song that’s been buzzing around in her head for the last few weeks. Some of the words come easily, others take some thought. Right now, she’s a little bit stuck. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’s chewing on the end of her pen when the door opens. Wynonna turns around to look, already knowing who she’s gonna find. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’s not surprised by the tall redhead leaning against her door frame, but the choice of </span>
  <em>
    <span>hat</span>
  </em>
  <span> Nicole wears is a little bit surprising. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Dude… a top hat?” Wynonna questions, raising her brows. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What? You don’t like it?” Nicole lifts one eyebrow, smirking as she steps into the room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not your usual style, that’s for sure. Looks hot though.” Wynonna admits. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Anything would look hot on her… it’s in her name. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole shrugs, coming in and straddling the piano bench next to Wynonna. “I was just testing it out. Anyway, do you have a sec? I need to give you your birthday present.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s eyebrows lift even higher and she shakes her head a bit. “Birthday present? What the hell. Why?! My birthday isn’t ‘til…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know. Little more than a week. I didn’t forget, I swear. I just -- the gift’s a little… time sensitive.” Nicole explains, unable to wipe the smirk off her lips. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna is completely baffled. </span>
  <em>
    <span>What the fuck is she talking about? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Birthdays aren’t that big of a deal for them. Every year, the two of them pick out things that are silly and random, but useful. Wynonna can’t fucking imagine why Nicole is being like this over something that’s probably weird as hell. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then, Nicole digs into her pocket and pulls out her phone, setting up the camera and resting it on the piano’s music stand. Wynonna scrunches up her nose and looks to the redhead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What the fuck, Haught?! Turn it off…” Wynonna tries to reach for the camera but Nicole grabs both of her wrists and puts them against her sides. Wynonna pulls her lips to the side and looks down, trying to keep her face from getting redder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Chill. Out. Let me do somethin’ nice for you, geez. I just wanna always be able to go back and watch this.” Nicole chuckles, glancing towards the video and making sure it’s getting them both. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The dopey, sideways grin she wears mostly for Wynonna is out in full force and Wynonna can’t help but smile, too. The anticipation is coursing through her madly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come </span>
  <em>
    <span>on</span>
  </em>
  <span>, then. Tell me what it is!” Wynonna turns to straddle the bench and face Nicole. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole takes the top hat off of her own head and reaches inside, pulling out a small envelope and placing it in Wynonna’s hands. She sits the hat down on top of Wynonna’s head. The older woman’s shoulders slump and she looks up at Nicole with the cutest expression. The hat suits her. The way she looks makes the redhead’s stomach flutter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“A card?” Wynonna asks, sounding soft. As much as she thought she’d be giving Haught hell for being so silly about this, she knows now that whatever it is, she’ll have this warm feeling burning in her chest instead.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not a lame ass card. Jesus, Wynonna, just open it!” Nicole laughs, biting her lip as she watches Wynonna’s fingers begin to open the envelope slowly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna keeps cutting her eyes at Nicole as she tears into the paper. She’s careful, still without a clue about what’s inside. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole feels like she’s about to vibrate out of her skin. She knows what Wynonna is thinking and this isn’t just one of their usual birthday things. This is so fucking special. Nicole can’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>wait</span>
  </em>
  <span> to see the look on Wynonna’s face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna finally gets into the envelope and reaches in, feeling two glossy, familiar shapes inside. Wynonna’s been to enough concerts to know what a pair of tickets feel like. She narrows her eyes at Nicole and pulls the tickets out, setting the envelope on the piano and looking down at them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The smaller woman’s face changes to something Nicole has never seen before. It lights a fire in her belly. She’s almost bouncing off the seat. Wynonna’s blue eyes get so big and her bottom lip begins to tremble. She lets out a sound that seems like she’s going to talk but she can’t. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she can’t even breathe.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wynonna…” Nicole says softly, almost worried. She rests her hand against Wynonna’s knee, rubbing gently. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The brunette looks up at Nicole finally and she has tears shining in her eyes. “Nicole, please… please don’t joke around like this, okay? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Please</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I-It’s not funny…” Wynonna sounds pitiful. She sniffles and wipes her nose with the back of her free hand, still staring at the pieces of paper in her other one. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s eyebrows pull together and her smile softens a bit. “What?! ‘Nonna… no. It’s– it’s not a joke. It’s real! We’re going this weekend.” Nicole’s hands go to Wynonna’s shoulders and rub gently, smoothing down her arms. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna looks back up at her, eyes filling up with tears that spill freely down her cheeks this time. “Really?” Wynonna says, laughing a little. Her smile is so fucking big. She can’t stop looking between the tickets and Haught, her bottom lip pulled between her teeth. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Really, really.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna lets out an excited sound that’s almost a squeal and throws her arms around Nicole, burying her face in her chest and crying hard. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, ‘Nonna…” Nicole smiles, closing her eyes and wrapping her arms around her. One of her hands goes to the back of Wynonna’s head, catching the falling hat and moving it off to the side. Nicole puts her hand right back, letting it cradle Wynonna as she cries. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The feeling in Nicole’s chest is indescribable. She can feel the pure happiness radiating between them. Being this happy is what Wynonna always deserves. Knowing that she’s the one to give it to her, at least this once, makes her feel invincible. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole lets Wynonna cry and holds her until the tears seem to calm. Wynonna breathes out a soft laugh and turns her head, looking towards the still running camera. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, god…” She groans, immediately burying her face back in Nicole’s chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The taller woman laughs, reaching for her phone and holding it up so that they’re both framed perfectly. “How we feelin’, Earp?” Nicole chuckles, smiling down at Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna looks back up to the camera shyly. At the sight of them all snuggled up like this, Wynonna thinks they look like they belong this way. It just looks </span>
  <em>
    <span>right</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And, fuck, it </span>
  <em>
    <span>feels </span>
  </em>
  <span>that way, too. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We’re gonna see Stevie.” Wynonna speaks after a second or two. Her face is partially hidden in Nicole’s sweatshirt still and her voice is sweet, melting Nicole’s heart even more. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s hand smoothes over the back of Wynonna’s head and she leans back enough to really look down at her. She laughs again, beautiful and clear. “Yeah. We’re gonna see Stevie. You happy?” Her voice softens so much with the last two words. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She tucks Wynonna’s hair behind her ears and cradles her head again, holding her. Looking at her like she’s precious. The way Wynonna is looking up at her… those bright blue eyes even more blue and shiny from crying. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Happy tears, too</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Nicole thinks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’s seen Wynonna cry so many unhappy tears. Held her through it so many days and nights. Sometimes, she thinks it will never end. It breaks her heart into a million pieces every single time. Not this time, though. Her heart feels like it’s going to burst with joy. With </span>
  <em>
    <span>love</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s hand grips at Nicole’s shirt and her eyes fall to those smiling, perfect lips. For just a moment… Wynonna thinks they might…. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s heart leaps when she feels Wynonna’s breath against her mouth. Sees her looking. She’s so sure that she’s just gonna lean in and… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She doesn’t. Wynonna’s eyes go back to Nicole’s and she nods, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth and sitting back some. “Thank you, Haughtstuff. Really I – I don’t know what to say. I don’t know how I’m ever gonna repay you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shhh… my best gift is gonna be seeing you see Stevie. Somehow, I bet it’ll be even better than this video we have now.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shut up, loser.” Wynonna laughs, jabbing Nicole in the ribs and leaning back against her shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole turns off the recording and just holds Wynonna for a bit longer. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>September 7, 2019</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna knows she’s probably spending way too much time getting ready but she can’t help it. She’s dressed in a pair of her black, frayed-hem jeans, her red velvet Doc’s and a black satin top that ties in the middle of her belly. There’s nothing underneath, the entire center of her chest is exposed. She wears a subtle choker and another silver necklace that dangles between her breasts, resting against the sword tattoo there. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The Earp woman is standing in front of her full-body mirror, finalizing her curls. There’s three knocks against Wynonna’s door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come in, unless you’re my Haughty…” Wynonna grins in the mirror at her own joke. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck you, dude. I’ll go see Stevie without you.” Nicole calls back through the door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, hell no. I take it back. What I meant to say was, </span>
  <em>
    <span>only </span>
  </em>
  <span>come in if you’re my Haughty.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Slowly, the door opens until Wynonna can see Nicole behind her in the mirror. Her short red hair is pulled back in a bun and a few of the shorter pieces fall loose and frame her face. A black button down shirt is tucked into fitting black, ankle-length dress pants. The buttons are open just enough to expose the flesh between Nicole’s breasts. Over it all, she’s wearing a long grey tweed jacket and on her feet are some black velvet slip-on dress shoes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s mouth falls open a little bit when she sees her, forgetting about what she’s doing. Nicole is typing something on her phone, she hasn’t looked up to see Wynonna yet. Wynonna’s throat feels raw. She looks so fucking beautiful. The older woman is quickly reminded of the hot iron in her hands when it bumps into her fingers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck!” She hisses, placing the iron down on the desk and shaking her burning hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?! What happened?” Nicole’s head snaps up and she moves to Wynonna’s side immediately. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna takes the fingers into her mouth and shakes her head. She takes them out almost instantly. That doesn’t help. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You burned your hand?” Nicole takes Wynonna’s hand gently in her own, easily finding the angry red marks across the pointer and middle fingers of her right hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s fine, it’ll be fine.” Wynonna shakes her head, taking in a deep breath and letting it out. She looks up at the woman holding her hand, having to shake her head again. </span>
  <em>
    <span>God, it’s so fucking stupid. You just burned yourself and all you can think about is how hot she looks… </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“C’mere,” Nicole beckons, taking Wynonna’s wrist gently and guiding her out of the bedroom and into the bathroom around the corner. “Sit,” she says gently, motioning to the closed toilet seat lid. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna laughs under her breath, but does as Nicole says. The redhead has always had a knack for taking care of people. She’s certified in First Aid… Of course. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole pushes her sleeves up and finds a clean cloth, running it under some cool water. With it saturated, she moves back to Wynonna’s side and sits down on the edge of the bathtub, taking Wynonna’s hand in her own again. She lays Wynonna’s hand palm up against her knees and covers the burn marks with the cloth, pressing lightly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If we never make it as a band, you could always become a medic,” Wynonna says softly, glancing up at Nicole through her lashes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah right, like I’d ever let you see me fail.” Nicole smiles, cute and lopsided. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For the first time, Nicole lets her eyes wander over Wynonna. The vision makes her breath catch in her throat. The shirt she’s wearing shows off so much delicious skin and that tattoo Nicole thinks will surely be the end of her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” Wynonna’s voice pulls her back, making her look up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She gapes for a moment, searching for words. “You just – you l-look really pretty, Wynonna.” Nicole gulps, looking back to the woman’s wound and busying herself by unwrapping it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna feels her cheeks burn. She utters a small ‘thanks’ but if Nicole had been looking, she’d definitely see the redness in Wynonna’s face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Looks okay. It’ll probably blister later on, which sucks. I’ll just bandage it for now.” Nicole says, standing up again and rummaging through the medicine cabinet for the ointment and band-aids she needs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna lets the redhead doctor her fingers and smiles up at her when it’s all finished. “My hero.” She smirks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“All in a day’s work.” Nicole shrugs, returning the smirk as she puts her jacket sleeves back into place and tucks her hands into the pockets. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I needed to finish some curls and do my lipstick. Can’t believe I burned my fucking hand. What a </span>
  <em>
    <span>dumbass</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Wynonna sighs, turning back around to head into her room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, hey, for one thing… you’re not dumb. For another, I’ve got… two healthy hands.” Nicole offers, holding up her hands for Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They’re so big. The way the veins bulge... The way her rings and her watch looks... It’s downright </span>
  <em>
    <span>sinful</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna swallows hard, giving Haught a firm nod. “Alright, show me what you got.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She hands the curling iron off to the other woman and faces the mirror again. It’s pretty precious the way Nicole carefully curls her hair. Wynonna sneakily snaps a few pictures in the mirror when Nicole is concentrating particularly hard and not paying attention. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It looks perfect when she’s done. </span>
  <em>
    <span>She’s </span>
  </em>
  <span>perfect. There’s nothing she can’t do. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna rummages through her makeup until she finds the tube of dark red lipstick that she wants and uncaps it. “I think I’ve got this one. Don’t need you makin’ me look like a clown.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She tries, but the pressure against her fingers is a little much at the moment. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole notices the wince and takes the lipstick out of Wynonna’s hand and turns her around by her arm. Wynonna raises her eyebrows at the firm but still gentle way Nicole handles her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Believe it or not, Earp, I’ve worn lipstick before,” Nicole tells her, taking her chin gently between her thumb and forefinger. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s heart stops. She can’t do anything but look up at the tall woman as she carefully applies the makeup to her lips. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole prays she isn’t trembling—prays she doesn’t fuck this up. Wynonna’s so close and this, for whatever reason, feels </span>
  <em>
    <span>intimate</span>
  </em>
  <span>. She holds her breath the entire time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When it’s finished, Nicole caps the lipstick and turns Wynonna back towards the mirror. “So? Think you look like a clown?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna feels drunk and she hasn’t had a sip to drink all day. “Lil bit,” she jokes, taking in a deep breath and letting it go. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole rolls her eyes, smirking. “Yeah, right. Must be a really sexy clown.” She turns away from Wynonna and moves towards the door. “You ready now?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Y-yeah. All good. Let’s fuckin’ go!” Wynonna smiles, grabbing the black crossbody bag off the end of her bed and elbowing Haught as she brushes past her and walks ahead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When they step into the venue, the entire atmosphere changes. Both of them have been to more shows than they can count. Some have been really big, others virtually unknown. Every single time, Wynonna has felt a certain kind of energy rattling through her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The anticipation and the adrenaline coursing through her is the same as when she goes on. She feels like she’s buzzing. This is like that, but multiplied by a </span>
  <em>
    <span>trillion</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They end up hand-in-hand. Their fingers stay intertwined the entire time as Nicole buys them each a beer and leads them to their seats. To anyone else, Wynonna knows how they must look. Selfishly, and maybe wrongly, she </span>
  <em>
    <span>hopes</span>
  </em>
  <span> people think they’re together. If the closest she can get to truly belonging to Nicole Haught without screwing the entire thing up is in the minds of strangers, she’ll fucking take it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna doesn’t know how she hadn’t realized it before, but their seats are </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>close. They stop in the aisle of the fourth row and Nicole is grinning, her dimples on full display. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Kinda hoped you wouldn’t notice ‘til we got here.” She leans in and speaks against Wynonna’s ear so that she can hear her over the rumble of thousands of voices speaking at once. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Haught, this – this is fucking insane.” Wynonna shakes her head, her smile never wavering as she looks around, trying to take it all in. The stage is set and when Wynonna sees Stevie’s microphone stand, adorned with all the ribbons and scarves, she feels like her heart might beat out of her chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole just watches </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>, unable to think of a time that she’s ever been this happy. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They finish their beers before the lights go down and Wynonna moves to stand in front of Nicole, her back settling against Nicole’s front. Nicole wraps her arms around her securely, resting her chin against the shorter woman’s shoulder as the music begins. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They both feel it deep in their bones. Nicole can feel Wynonna trembling in her arms. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You okay?” She asks, smiling against Wynonna’s ear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When she doesn’t get an answer, she leans her head enough to see the brunette’s face and laughs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna is  crying—fully crying. There’s a huge, permanent grin etched on her face. She looks </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> beautiful. Nicole feels the happiest tears welling up in her own eyes as she holds Wynonna closer, swaying gently to the music. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Stevie takes the stage, opening with </span>
  <em>
    <span>Gold &amp; Braid</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Wynonna sobs through the entire number and Nicole barely takes her eyes off of her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually, Wynonna gets her bearings enough for them to be able to dance and shout the lyrics along with Stevie. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around</span>
  </em>
  <span> starts and Wynonna turns to look at Nicole. The redhead is already grinning back at her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Remember that night?” Wynonna says, leaning her head back against Nicole’s shoulder and putting her lips right to her ear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole shivers at the feeling and the memory of the first night they’d played together. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Always.” Nicole looks down at her, brown eyes finding her lips. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna doesn’t miss it, but convinces herself that it’s because of her lipstick. It’s probably a little smeared. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Something</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Anything to keep it from meaning that Nicole is thinking about kissing her. It’s easier to fight when she convinces herself Nicole doesn’t want her like this.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole forces her eyes back up to Stevie and tries to stop thinking about having that red lipstick all over her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Stevie tells a long but beautiful story before she plays </span>
  <em>
    <span>Gypsy</span>
  </em>
  <span> and both Wynonna and Nicole hang on every word. She tells them about her life before she became famous, when it was just her and Lindsey living in a tiny apartment with just a mattress on the floor. She recounts a detail about a store called The Velvet Underground and looking through the window, having a vision that one day she’d be able to afford anything from there that she wanted. When it all gets too much, she puts her mattress back on the floor and decorates it with lace and paper flowers, like back then. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The story resonates so deeply with Wynonna. Something inside just clicks. She laces her fingers with Nicole’s against her belly and makes a silent promise that one day, they’ll make it. They’ll get their dreams. Together. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Stevie does a mash-up of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Wild Heart</span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>Bella Donna</span>
  </em>
  <span> that gets Wynonna screaming so loudly, she’s sure she’ll lose her voice.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>During intermission, Nicole goes to the bathroom and by the time she gets back to their seats, Wynonna is handing her a second beer and holding up the t-shirt she got for her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I had one good hand and didn’t wanna risk spilling a beer so we’re sharing that one.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How did you do that so quick?! The line for the bathroom alone was like… ten miles long.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I flirted with some dudes in line and they let me go ahead. Thank me later.” Wynonna looks up at Nicole through her lashes and shrugs, smirking. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole rolls her eyes but laughs. It’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>so</span>
  </em>
  <span> Wynonna. Everything she does makes Nicole love her more. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I got us the same shirt, by the way.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole raises her eyebrows as she drinks her beer. “You got us matching shirts?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s kinda gay, Wyn.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I said </span>
  <em>
    <span>don’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m just sayin’... they’re cute though. We’re gonna look good. Shae and Waverly will be jealous.” Nicole winds her arm back around Wynonna’s middle and pulls her against her, fingers brushing against warm skin. She wants to spend as much time like this as possible. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna laughs, resting her hands over Nicole’s and leaning her head back against her shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Stevie plays the songs everyone loves, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Rhiannon</span>
  </em>
  <span>, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Gold Dust Woman</span>
  </em>
  <span>… so many more. Near the end of the show, the opening of </span>
  <em>
    <span>If You Were My Love</span>
  </em>
  <span> starts and Wynonna stiffens a bit. She knows this song well, having played it on repeat many a lonely night. Dreaming about something she can’t have. Something she knows she’ll only fuck up if she tries. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That </span>
  <em>
    <span>something </span>
  </em>
  <span>holds her a little bit tighter and leans her cheek against Wynonna’s head, swaying gently and mouthing the words to the song. When it’s over, they both have tears in their eyes and neither of them look at one another until they’re dry. They just hold on. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Landslide</span>
  </em>
  <span> finishes the show and this time</span>
  <em>
    <span> Nicole </span>
  </em>
  <span>sobs. Wynonna brings their intertwined hands up to her lips and leaves a red lip print on the back of Nicole’s hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When they step out of the arena and into the night air, Wynonna becomes painfully aware of her decision to not wear a jacket. They can see their breath in front of them. She doesn’t say anything about it and she doesn’t have to. Nicole slips out of her coat and holds it up for Wynonna to shrug into. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Haught…” Wynonna tries to object but Nicole refuses. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nah, put it on. You’ve barely got a shirt on, you’ll freeze.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna doesn’t put up any more fight. She settles into the warm jacket and lets herself be surrounded by the smell of her best friend. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole drapes her arm over Wynonna’s shoulders and they don’t stop talking about the show for a second as they walk to the subway and board the train home. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s stop comes first and Wynonna gets off with her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t really want you to ride home alone. Just come home with me, I can drive you from there.” Nicole offers, soft concern wrinkling her forehead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No need for driving if I just stay over. That okay with you, Haughtshot?” Wynonna links their arms at the elbow as they walk. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole smirks, nodding. “More than. You don’t have to ask, you know that.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They’re laughing so hard when they stumble into Nicole’s apartment that they can barely breath. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shhh, I’ve got neighbors, you know?!” Nicole says, her tone hushed as she struggles to stop laughing herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s laughter turns into a yawn as she makes her way into Nicole’s bedroom. She shrugs out of the warm jacket and lays it over the desk chair. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole is about to slip out of her shoes when she remembers something. “Shit, I forgot, I’m –– my neighbor is workin’ all night, I’m supposed to go check on his cat when we got back.  I’ll be right back, Wyn.” She explains, turning and heading back out the door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In Nicole’s absence, Wynonna strips out of her clothes and wipes off her makeup, slipping into the new Stevie shirt and curling up underneath Nicole’s covers to escape the chill of the room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole comes back in about ten minutes later. “The stupid cat was hiding, couldn’t find her for like…” Nicole trails off when she notices Wynonna isn’t listening. A stupid grin spreads across her face when she sees </span>
  <em>
    <span>why.</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>The tiny woman is curled up in Nicole’s bed, fast asleep. Her long hair is splayed across the pillow and her mouth is open a little, somehow she looks younger than usual. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole peels her eyes away from Wynonna and undresses as quietly as she can, getting herself ready for bed. She can see that Wynonna is wearing the new t-shirt and thinks it’ll make her at least laugh to wake up and find Nicole in the same thing. So she puts it on. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Very gently, the taller woman pulls back the covers on her side and climbs into bed next to Wynonna. She barely gets settled back against the pillows comfortably before Wynonna stirs. Nicole goes rigid, feeling bad for waking her. But Wynonna doesn’t fully wake, she just shifts herself closer to Nicole, throwing her leg and arm over her and snuggling into her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For maybe the thousandth time that night, Nicole thinks her heart is going to explode. Surely this is it, the final straw. How can she take much more? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, Wynonna…” She breathes, settling and keeping her eyes on the brunette. Her fingers move to Wynonna’s hair, pushing the pieces that have fallen into her face back and tucking them behind her ear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her body feels so warm and soft against Nicole’s. She doesn’t know how long she just watches her sleep. This isn’t something she gets very often… the opportunity to just hold Wynonna in her arms while she sleeps. The chance to pretend that maybe someday, Wynonna will really be </span>
  <em>
    <span>hers</span>
  </em>
  <span> to hold. She doesn’t believe it and probably never will, but she sure can pretend. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole pulls out her phone and takes a few pictures, her heart beating faster when she sees how sweet and </span>
  <em>
    <span>perfect</span>
  </em>
  <span> Wynonna looks reflected on the screen. She tucks the images away in a folder for another day. Maybe to show Wynonna when she wants to poke fun at her, or something. Part of her prays for the ‘or something’ option. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually, Nicole settles in with her and Wynonna shifts, nuzzling her face into Nicole’s chest right under her chin. The redhead sighs, closing her eyes and breathing slow. Breathing Wynonna in. Holding her makes her bones feel heavy in the most beautiful way. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’s never known comfort like this. When she closes her eyes, the lyrics to one of the songs Stevie sang tonight flood her mind. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, if you were my love</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>If you were my love </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole feels like she might cry, but she tries not to. The song doesn’t leave her mind and she can’t sleep for thinking about it. For thinking about Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Softly, as quietly as she can, she starts to sing the song. Her lips brushing against Wynonna’s hair. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>If you were my love </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>However momentarily </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, if I were the one </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Who watched over your sleeping </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>You would never have been frightened </span>
  </em>
  <em></em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  
  <em>
    <span>At all </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em></em>
  <span>At all </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole sings the words until she falls asleep holding Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>January 26, 2020 </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The record has stopped playing and Wynonna is sleeping soundly against Nicole’s chest. She can feel Wynonna’s breath on her neck and the gentle rise and fall of her breathing against her hands. There’s no feeling more soothing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna fell asleep a while ago. Before Nicole even got to the part in the story where they came in the door laughing. She always fell asleep before Nicole got to the part where she sings to her. But she tells the story all the way through every time. Even as Wynonna sleeps. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole tells the story about the best night of her whole life and sings to her, no matter what. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Softly, she twists her fingers in the long flowing hair of the sleeping woman in her arms and sings the words of </span>
  <em>
    <span>If You Were My Love </span>
  </em>
  <span>quietly against her hair until she can’t keep her eyes open anymore and she falls asleep, too. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Tonight, Wynonna wakes, just a little. Just enough to hear the faint sound of Nicole singing to her. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It’s a dream</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she thinks. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It has to be.</span>
  </em>
  <span> If it is, it’s a good dream. One she wants to hang on to. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna grips at the worn yellow Hufflepuff shirt and breathes in the smell of Nicole and lets the memory of her </span>
  <em>
    <span>dream</span>
  </em>
  <span> and the safety of Nicole’s arms lull her back to sleep. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. somebody to you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Wynonna and Nicole go out to eat with Shae and Cleo. Waverly works on her music. Rosita tries to keep the momentum going to keep their trajectory of success moving in the right direction.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Wynonna wakes with her face pressed against the back of Nicole’s shoulder. Her muscles ache and cause her arm to tighten around the firm torso of her best friend facing away from her. The rest of her body extends and shakes as she stretches. A short euphoric feeling spreads through her in the instant after her stretch. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>If she let herself, she could fall right back to sleep. This bed is kryptonite. Nicole’s aroma is everywhere. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole </span>
  </em>
  <span>is right there. On her worst nights over the last three years, this has been the safe haven she knows will never fail her. It hasn’t yet. She can’t say that for almost anything else in her life. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You up, Earp?” Nicole asks. Her voice is low, but Wynonna can tell she’s been awake for a bit longer than she has. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mm,” Wynonna grumbles, wedging her face between the pillows and Nicole’s back. “No.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole chuckles. “Okay, just checking.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Reluctantly, Wynonna rolls away to lie on her back and stretch more thoroughly this time, releasing a long sound as her body continues to wake to full alertness. Nicole uses the opportunity to roll onto her other side and watch the other woman stretch. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The covers have slipped down past Wynonna’s waist and the old maleficent shirt rises the slightest bit to remind Nicole that there isn’t a lot of blank canvas left on Wynonna’s body--even if the woman seems to keep finding places for new tattoos. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sleep okay?” Nicole asks, already knowing the answer. Wynonna slept through the night, not waking up once. She usually does here. It’s when Wynonna is in her own bed that Nicole usually has to be there to catch Wynonna and pull her back to reality. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Like a rock. You?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Until some asshole busted my door in at four o’clock in the morning…” Nicole teases. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna turns onto her side to stare her into her best friend’s brown eyes with narrowed blues. “You know… Keep sayin’ shit like that and I’m gonna stop showin’ up here.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nah, you won’t,” Nicole replies confidently, smirking in a way that infuriates and excites Wynonna more than she likes to admit. “You know I’m kidding, Wyn. My door is always open for you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, you sap.” Wynonna hears her phone buzz. She turns to grab it off of the side table and sees she has a few messages waiting for her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Alex: </b>
  <em>
    <span>Tell Nic I said hey. </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <b>Alex: </b>
  <em>
    <span>P.S. Thought you said you weren’t going to crawl into bed with her ;) </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna smiles at her friend, a low snicker sounding mostly through her nose as she types out a reply. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Wynonna: </b>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck you, Vice. </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <b>Alex: </b>
  <em>
    <span>That ship has sailed. Make sure you don’t miss the next one. </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <b>Wynonna: </b>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t really like sailing. Thanks tho. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Is Alex upset you left?” Nicole asks evenly. She’s scrolling aimlessly on her own phone, trying not to look as irritated as she feels. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Idiot. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nah. She said hey, though,” Wynonna replies obliviously. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey back to her.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna scrolls to her thread with Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Waves: </b>
  <em>
    <span>Going to the practice space to try and write a little if I’m not home when you get there. I love you.</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <b>Wynonna: </b>
  <em>
    <span>Be safe baby girl. I love you too. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna sets her phone back on the side table and turns onto her stomach, kicking her feet out behind her. A small smile forms on her lips as she looks up at Nicole who sits against the headboard of her bed. “Okay, Haughty. Waves is spending the day writing… Looks like I get to annoy you all day long if you don’t have plans.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The redhead locks her phone and lies it down in her lap, looking down at the brunette with a quirked eyebrow. “What if I have plans?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Youuuuu cancel them or invite your super kickass, awesome best friend to tag along? Or you can just leave me to get into whatever trouble I can find for myself… All aloooone.” Wynonna purses her lips and shrugs quickly. “Your call.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It should be illegal for Wynonna to look like </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>with those lips in Nicole’s bed, the guitarist thinks. How easy would it be to spend the day right here? Nicole’s dreamed about it most nights since the concert she recounted earlier that morning. Every day, she tricks herself into thinking she’ll magically be over Wynonna Earp. Every day, she settles more comfortably into the fall. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So what’s it gonna be?” Wynonna asks when Nicole spends too long staring at her lips. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole blinks and brings her gaze back to Wynonna’s. “You hungry? I’m starving.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Feed me, Seymour,” Wynonna jokes</span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Waverly uses the key she has to enter their space. Writing at home just </span>
  <em>
    <span>isn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>working for her the last few times she’s tried. Today, on their day off, is a perfect day to test the vibes of the space when she’ll have it to herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Almost instantly, she feels like she’s breathing differently. The energy radiates with every time they’ve practiced together in the short time this place has belonged to them. Waverly beelines for her keyboard. Melodies start to swim in her head and she wants to play them before they leave her. She fishes her notebook out of her bag before letting it fall to the ground beside her keyboard. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Fingers move skillfully over the keys and music starts to fill the empty room. A guitar part manifests within Waverly’s mind next and she makes note of the way it bounces with the string of notes she plays. Then, the beat kicks in with drums and a bassline. Waverly can hear the track even sitting by herself. The words will come later. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sometimes, she writes the words first, but this time, the music comes to her so easily. She’s lost in her craft when she sees something move out of the corner of her eye. Startling, the music comes to an abrupt halt and she finds Rosita standing there watching her carefully. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh geeze!” Waverly yelps. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh god, Waves!” Rosita grins, laughing at the display. “I’m sorry. I didn’t-- I was in the bathroom when you got here. And then you were in such a zone… I didn’t want to interrupt. I’m sorry.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly turns to look out in front of her and notices the laptop, bag and jacket then. Her eagerness to get started blinded her from the items or maybe she would have known to look out for another person. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s totally okay… I-- didn’t think anyone would be here today,” Waverly admits bashfully, tucking her wavy hair behind her ears. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She realizes that she must look… </span>
  <em>
    <span>Oh no. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Her hair is mussed and wavy, having dried naturally from her shower that morning. She put product in it and let it go. She’s wearing a simple white long sleeve crop sweater and light blue jeans. Nowhere near ready to see Rosita who somehow always looks like she’s runway ready--even when she was wearing that Elvis t-shirt that one time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Today, the band’s manager doesn’t look </span>
  <em>
    <span>too </span>
  </em>
  <span>much more dressed up than Waverly is, but Waverly can’t stop herself from feeling underdressed and </span>
  <em>
    <span>pathetic </span>
  </em>
  <span>in comparison. Rosita’s grey beige sweater looks delicious against her skin. The shirt dips down past her cleavage and Waverly wonders if this woman makes it her mission to torture the rest of the world. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t think so either. I was just getting some emails out and trying to set up some meetings… Make some phone calls. Needed a change in scenery,” Rosita offers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly laughs at the coincidence. Both of them are here for similar reasons. This little crush of Waverly’s isn’t going anywhere any time soon if things like this keep happening. “Yeah, me too… It’s like I couldn’t hear any music back at home. But, I can leave if--”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh hell no. Whatever you were playing sounds really good. What kind of manager would I be if I got in the way of my artist’s creativity? You won’t bother me at all. Just pretend I’m not even here.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You’re always saying that, but forgetting you’re probably the hottest woman in the universe and it’s physically impossible to pretend you’re invisible when all anyone ever wants to do is look at you and kiss you and-- </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly thinks to herself, but Rosita’s voice breaks through her inner monologue of despair. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I can leave, though, if </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> need me to.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No!” Waverly responds instantly. As impossible as it will be to </span>
  <em>
    <span>pretend she isn’t there, </span>
  </em>
  <span>the last thing the pianist wants is to watch Rosita walk out the door. “You don’t have to leave. Please stay. Maybe, I can bounce some ideas off of you if I get stuck.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure thing.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For a while, Waverly plays and Rosita works. They steal glances when the other isn’t looking. Waverly watches Rosita pull her hair up into a messy bun on the top of her head, making sure to pull two pieces of hair down to frame her face even as she does her hair in haste. It makes Waverly lose her breath and just stare. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita notices the silence and looks up just in time to catch the awed look on Waverly’s face. The woman gives her a wide grin. “You stuck?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Huh?” Waverly misses the meaning at first. “Oh! No, I was just. Taking a break.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That sounds great… Good idea. We should order some food and take a breather.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>We? </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What do you want? My treat.” Rosita continues. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um… I’m vegan, so that kind of… narrows it down a little. But, it’s okay! I can always run and get something to eat and--”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No way. I know a place close by. And they deliver. C’mere.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly smiles softly and walks over to where Rosita’s sitting at the couch. She takes her place on the spot designated for her by the pat of a hand with </span>
  <em>
    <span>long </span>
  </em>
  <span>fingers on it. Waverly runs her hand through her hair to get it out of her face, shaking it a bit as it falls around her shoulders. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita stares now. Waverly’s long, wavy hair is perfect on her. Her outfit is simple and Rosita can’t help but imagine the woman curled up on the couch, tucked under her arm. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t do this again, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Rosita reminds herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Dating a client is taboo, but not illegal. Being mostly commission-based… and basically her own boss, the only thing that could end her partnership with </span>
  <em>
    <span>Chasing Skylarks </span>
  </em>
  <span>is herself… or </span>
  <em>
    <span>Chasing Skylarks. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She could probably pursue this and none of the women would care. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Their success is already going so well, though. No need to threaten it because Rosita’s useless over a pretty woman. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Here. Just order what you want. Pretty much anything from here is good. I’m not even vegan, but I </span>
  <em>
    <span>love </span>
  </em>
  <span>eating here,” Rosita explains, leaning back against the couch and bringing her legs up under her. She sits cross-legged now. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly scrunches her nose cutely. “Are you sure?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Waverly.” Rosita tilts her head down and looks pointedly at her. “Order.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Anyone ever told you you’re kinda bossy?” Waverly jokes, turning to scroll through the menu on Rosita’s phone. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Once or twice, maybe.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh yeah, I’m sure. Just once or twice.” Waverly taps a few things and hands the phone back to Rosita. “And I was the </span>
  <em>
    <span>twice </span>
  </em>
  <span>time, I’m sure.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Definitely.” Rosita puts in her own order and tosses her phone onto the table. Her elbow props up on the back of the couch and her head falls against her hand as she watches Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Any cool gigs or anything? I don’t really know everything you do… Wynonna’s better about the behind the scenes stuff believe it or not. She just likes to play stupid to see what people will try to pull over on her.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sneaky…” Rosita comments with a glint in her eye. “Yeah, I’ve been putting out feelers. A few things have come up, but they’re lowballing me on compensation, so I’m still in talks with them. Also waiting on something else. But, I like to nail down all the details before I share anything. Don’t want to get hopes up or give wrong info. Plus… I’d want the rest of the band here.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ouch. </span>
  </em>
  <span>The sting of the statement hits Waverly harder than it should. The illusion of having something special with their manager sort of evaporates every single time they talk… Then, comes right back when they talk some more. Is this how Nicole feels with her sister? </span>
  <em>
    <span>It sucks. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you always working? What do you do for fun? What other things do you like?” Waverly asks, mirroring Rosita’s position on the couch. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I used to bartend. Sometimes, I still make a show of it when I make myself cocktails at home.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No way! I used to bartend, too. Was never great at bottle tricks or anything like that, but I never really tried either.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita licks her lips. “If you want to learn, I could show you some tricks one night. Maybe once I help land you a big headliner gig or something, I can have you guys over and we’ll have a party.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You guys. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Always with the band. Could Rosita throw her a bone? One little bone that gave her hope for something? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>No, </span>
  </em>
  <span>a voice sounds in her head. It sounds like Wynonna. As much as her older sister had a parade of partners throughout her life, Wynonna was careful not to fuck with people like Rosita. The last thing Wynonna ever wants ever is to feel like she owes her success to anyone but herself. Waverly tries to take a page out of that book and reel herself back in. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita continues to speak, “I liked chemistry in high school and even considered majoring in biochemistry, but… there was a pretty great band in high school and they had trouble kind of figuring out how to get shows booked. I was pretty popular and really great at networking, getting things done. I landed them a few gigs and kind of realized… That was what I really </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>wanted to do. It’s thrilling when I land a deal and get to see the look on my clients’ faces. There’s not much else like it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly takes in every word like Rosita’s giving her the secrets to the universe. Rosita’s so </span>
  <em>
    <span>smart. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Biochemistry? Waverly had been pretty good at that herself, but music had always been her passion since day one. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What about you?” Rosita asks. “I feel like I’ve done all the talking.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You don’t know everything about me from googling me?” Waverly teases. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know what the world says about you, but what do you say about you, Waverly Earp?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly considers the question. “Music and performing is kind of my whole thing. I was in marching band… And I was a cheerleader. I was valedictorian. We started the band right after I got out of high school and ever since then, it’s basically been my life.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita nods. “I guess that’s pretty obvious since you’re spending your off day here… At the keyboard… Writing…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly ducks her head and laughs. She raises her head and narrows her eyes at Rosita. “You’re here, too.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Guess we kind of have the same dilemma, huh? Hopelessly devoted to the music and all that?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Big Grease fan?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Big musical fan,” Rosita clarifies. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What’s your favorite?” Waverly keeps her eyes narrowed waiting for the reply </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Stage or movie?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Both.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Stage, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hadestown</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Movie,</span>
  <em>
    <span> Moulin Rouge</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Rosita answers immediately. “You?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Stage, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Legally Blonde</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Movie, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Burlesque</span>
  </em>
  <span>--and </span>
  <em>
    <span>yes, </span>
  </em>
  <span>I consider it a musical.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fair enough… Can’t say your picks are super shocking.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly scoffs in mock offense. “Are you saying I’m predictable?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Before Rosita can answer, the food is there. Rosita goes out to meet the delivery person and walks back in with the food. “I don’t think I’d say that… I still have a lot of questions about you, Waverly Earp.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ask away. I’m an open book!” Waverly touts proudly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Is your birthday really September eighth?” Rosita asks. “You’re a Virgo?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How did you know that?” Waverly’s eyes widen with surprise.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Google does get some things factually right, I guess,” Rosita explains. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh! Right! Yes, I’m a Virgo. You are?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hmm,” Rosita seems to consider something as she hums in consideration before answering. “A Cancer. July 16.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So are we compatible? Or…?” Waverly hopes it comes across as a joke even if she’s genuinely curious. </span>
  <em>
    <span>That was so stupid to say. Stupid stupid stupid. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita laughs, though, and Waverly relaxes. “In most ways, yes. Theoretically, you may be too logical for me--an emotional mess. But… I don’t really know if I get that kind of vibe from you. So, we should be a good team. Your sister’s a Virgo, too, right?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ouch part one-hundred. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mhm,” Waverly answers shortly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Good. I think the only one that could be problematic if we’re going to let the stars control us is Shae for me. Typically, Cancers don’t mesh well with Aquariuses, but we’re doing okay so far.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>This is so not where I wanted this conversation to go, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly sighs internally. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They eat and talk and Waverly doesn’t try to push it anymore. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Cleo runs up to Shae on the couch and falls into her lap with her phone in her hand. “Baby, look at this! Look!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The sounds of one of their original songs, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t Save Me, </span>
  </em>
  <span>reaches Shae’s ears before she sees the video of them from their show last night. They sound good. They look good. It’s amazing to see their hard work replaying back before her eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, we sound great!” Shae comments. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, silly! Look at the </span>
  <em>
    <span>views! </span>
  </em>
  <span>It’s only been up for like… twelve hours and it’s almost got seven thousand views! Isn’t that like a lot for you guys?” Cleo bounces, pointing to the view count beneath the video. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Holy shit! Yeah, that’s… Wow. People are searching for us? That’s amazing!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, and the one of Nicole with Julien? Look at </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>one!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Twelve thousand?! </span>
  </em>
  <span>Hell, that’s almost double… Nic’s gonna lose her fucking mind.” Shae feels her chest swell with pride for her friend all over again. Last night still doesn’t seem real. It’s too good to be true. But, these videos prove the reality of it all. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ugh, I’m so glad I bagged you before you got all famous. You’d never look at me now,” Cleo teases. “OW!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae brings her hand away from Cleo’s side where she’s just pinched the other woman lightly. “Shut up, baby. You’re not worried about fame going to my head?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nope! Because I’ll make sure to remind you of your humble beginnings and who the queen supreme of your life really is!” Cleo pauses to take Shae’s face into both of her hands. She purses her lips at her girlfriend and talks in an almost baby-like voice. “Plus if you try to leave me, I’ll just spill all your dirty secrets all over the internet.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“God, you’re so lucky you’re so damn cute and funny…” Shae says lowly, eyes falling to her girlfriend’s lips. “Otherwise, you’d be insufferable.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Look in the mirror.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s all teasing, they both know. Shae can’t believe she gets to be this happy with someone this funny who can take the ribbing she wants to dish out just as easily as it can be dished right back to her. Their lips have barely touched when Shae’s phone goes off. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s Nic… She wants to meet up for lunch. With Wynonna… Who apparently is already there… And spent the night.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wait… Didn’t Alex go home with Wynonna last night?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh huh.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But Wynonna left her and went to stay with Nicole?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh huh.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So… Maybe we’re actually going to finally, </span>
  <em>
    <span>finally </span>
  </em>
  <span>have a real double date?!” Cleo bounces again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh my sweet, sweet love… Absolutely not.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Really?!” Cleo pouts. “Even with all that?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae nods, rolling her lips in together in a slight frown. “Guarantee it.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Boo! Well, I am hungry, either way. So, let’s go have our boring </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>double date.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae holds the restaurant door open for Cleo and starts taking her jacket off once they’re inside. Her eyes scan the busy place for the other… </span>
  <em>
    <span>pair.</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Is it just the two of you?” The host leans in a little closer to Cleo to ask over the noise. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um, well… no, we’re supposed to be meeting our friends.” Cleo begins. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae steps in, leaning over Cleo’s shoulder and draping her jacket over her arm. “Super tall, buff redhead, smaller but still taller than me brunette. Ton of tattoos.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, that couple! They’re in a booth in the back right corner.” The host explains. “I can take you over?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae has to fight the urge to roll her eyes. That couple, of course. Even </span>
  <em>
    <span>strangers</span>
  </em>
  <span> thought Wynonna and Nicole were together. Shae feels pretty confident that her life would be a hell of a lot easier if it were true. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think we’ll be able to find them, but thank you for your help.” Shae smiles, following after her girlfriend in the suggested direction. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It doesn’t take them long to find Wynonna and Nicole. The two of them are laughing so hard they can barely breathe. From what Shae can tell, at least part of the reason is that they’ve been blowing their straw wrappers back and forth at one another. The discarded papers are on the table and Wynonna still has her straw clutched in her hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna and Nicole are on the same side of the booth. Nicole’s head is tossed back against the seat and Wynonna’s is on Nicole’s shoulder. No wonder the poor host thought they were a couple. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Would you look at that… maybe it </span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span> a double date.” Cleo whispers to Shae over her shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“In our fucking dreams.” Shae sighs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The other two women don’t even notice them approaching until they’re about to sit down. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh! God, hey guys, sorry…” Nicole grins up at them, lifting her head just a little and leaning to rest it against Wynonna’s instead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You two look cozy.” Shae comments, sliding into the booth after Cleo. Cleo’s hand rests against her thigh for only a second before Shae intertwines their fingers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole is dressed in pewter colored jeans, a grey hoodie and matching beanie with one of her denim jackets over it. Typical. She looks like Nicole dressed for the cold. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna looks like her normal self too in black ripped jeans, boots and a leather jacket, but Shae notices that the t-shirt she’s wearing is Nicole’s faded off-white </span>
  <em>
    <span>Jaws</span>
  </em>
  <span> t-shirt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We were just being stupid. I blew the straw wrapper at Haught when she wasn’t paying attention, you should’ve seen her face.” Wynonna laughs softly, sitting up straighter and pulling herself away from Nicole a little. Their shoulders still touch, but Wynonna isn’t resting her head against Nicole anymore. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The redhead’s cheeks burn and she clears her throat, her laughter and smile dying little by little. She knows it’s dumb. She shouldn’t feel sad that Wynonna isn’t leaning on her anymore, but she does. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We ordered you guys your usual drinks a few minutes before you came in.” Nicole explains, stretching her arm across the back of the seat instead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What if we didn’t want that today?” Shae asks, trying to keep from smirking at her best friend. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole rolls her eyes. “As if. I haven’t gotten your drink order wrong in </span>
  <em>
    <span>years</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Pressman.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s cute, Haught. And true.” Shae admits with a shrug. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna takes a sip from her beer and spins the bottle around a few times slowly when it’s back on the table. Shae watches Nicole watch Wynonna. She can see the love in those brown eyes as clear as anything. Watching these two completely miss every sign and signal or simply choose to ignore it, for </span>
  <em>
    <span>years</span>
  </em>
  <span> at this point, is incredibly frustrating. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Cleo was showing me some videos she took at the show and posted online, they have like a ton of views already.” Shae begins to explain. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah I just posted them to see what would happen, but they’re doing pretty good. That probably means people are searching for you guys after last night.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna lifts her eyebrows and a smirk tugs at the corner of Nicole’s mouth. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Which ones did you post?” Wynonna asks, leaning her elbows on the table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The waiter comes with Cleo and Shae’s drinks while Cleo is telling them about the videos. Nicole looks surprised when she tells her about the numbers on the video of her and Julien. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why do you look so shocked, Haughtstuff?” Wynonna laughs, taking another drink as she watches her best friend. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Looking at Nicole like this, she’s reminded of the overwhelming pride that flooded her chest last night. When she was watching Nicole on stage and again when she was driving over to her place. It lights up again now, seeing her so humble. God, it makes Wynonna want to kiss her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She forces her eyes away from that perfect mouth and starts picking off the label of her beer. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, if I’m being honest I still don’t really believe it.” Nicole shrugs, a soft, dorky smile on her lips. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna chuckles lightly, shaking her head. She doesn’t look up at Nicole because she knows her eyes will give her away. “Well, it happened. And there’s a video with a shitload of views to prove it.” Wynonna points to Cleo’s phone. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I sent you the link, but you wouldn’t be able to hear shit in here, probably.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They order food and talk more about the show. About future shows. Cleo makes Nicole watch the video with the sound turned down, just to see. When the redhead starts analyzing every detail about herself without even hearing it, Wynonna finally breaks and goes in on her. She grills the younger woman lovingly about how fucking cool it was to watch her up there, on her own, just </span>
  <em>
    <span>shining</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nic, that video has so many fucking views because you were insane. It was perfect. Seriously. I know I'm not the only one who barely even noticed Julien was on stage when you were singing that song. It just – made sense. Like you were on fire. It was really, really special.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s rare for Wynonna’s emotions to crack open and spill out in something other than a song around anyone other than Waverly or Nicole. Shae and Cleo both feel like they’re witnessing something special watching Wynonna talk like this.   </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole looks like the wind has been knocked out of her. Her eyes widen and she takes a deep breath, smiling a little as she lets it out. “Wow. Didn’t know it felt… like that.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She’s telling the truth. It was one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen, Nic. Don’t let that go to your head, either.” Shae adds, trying to cushion it a bit. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She’s watched them enough to know what happens when Wynonna lets too many emotions out at once. She doesn’t wanna see her try to bottle it back up. Shae thinks, maybe if someone else spills some too, that it won’t seem weird. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna looks away from Nicole first and her eyes catch Shae’s for a second. It’s enough. Shae knows she did the right thing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually, they’re all four laughing together almost harder than Wynonna and Nicole had been when Cleo and Shae came in. Nicole’s phone rings from her back pocket and she has to wipe tears from her eyes to see who’s calling. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna catches the name on the screen without really meaning to. Her muscles ache and she tightens her grip on her bottle, wishing she hadn’t seen who was calling. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh. Sorry, guys – I’ll be right back. Just gonna take this.” Nicole excuses herself from the table and slides out of the booth. She steps out of a side door and onto the restaurant's patio, her finger pressed to her ear as she answers the phone, smiling. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They can all see her from the table. Wynonna and Shae look unabashedly and Cleo continues to eat. After a second of silence, she looks up. First at Wynonna, then to Shae before narrowing her own eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Guys, what?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s Spencer on the phone.” Shae answers her girlfriend, rolling her eyes and shaking her head as she looks away from Nicole, who is laughing outside. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How do you know?” Cleo asks, genuinely. Nicole hadn’t said a name and there was no way Shae could’ve seen the phone screen. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Cleo looks back to Wynonna and notices how hard her jaw is set. Her teeth must hurt. She rips at the beer bottle label more aggressively. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh.” Cleo mutters quietly, mostly to herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know why she still answers every time that bitch calls.” Shae sounds annoyed, her fingers tapping against the wooden table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna laughs, but there’s no humor behind it. She’d met Spencer Harris for the first time after being friends with Nicole for a few months. She was a little taller than Wynonna, with green eyes and curly hair that was a darker red than Nicole’s.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna remembers thinking at first how fucking gorgeous she was, even if she looked kind of mean. It didn’t take long for her to find out that it was more than</span>
  <em>
    <span> kind of</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Every interaction she had with the model had been completely bitchy. Wynonna had almost gotten into fist fights with her on more than one occasion. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The only person she seemed barely sweet to was Nicole but somehow they still got along. Nicole put up with her shit, they still made each other laugh. Wynonna decided a long time ago that maybe Spencer just hated </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>, for whatever reason. Either way, it burned Wynonna from the inside out every time she had to be near it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know why Nicole puts up with her shit at all anymore.” Wynonna mumbles. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s fucking dumb. It’s always bothered me. Always. Even when they dated ––” Shae trails off for a moment, a look of disgust on her face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna feels like she might hurl hearing </span>
  <em>
    <span>that. </span>
  </em>
  <span>That woman didn’t deserve Nicole and never would. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Neither do you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she thinks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nicole just does things for people. That’s just who she is.” Cleo offers, trying to diffuse some of the anger between the other two women at the table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I know, but doing things for someone and letting them walk all over you are different. Besides, Spencer fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>hates</span>
  </em>
  <span> Wynonna for no reason.” Shae defends, her tone still firm but softer when she’s speaking to her girlfriend. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She calls when she’s… on a shoot or something. Nicole told me one time. Spencer doesn’t like getting hit on by the dudes or talking to anyone really so she just calls Nicole during her breaks. And Nicole answers. Every. Time.” Wynonna tears the final shred off of her bottle. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>With a pile of paper on the table, she starts tearing the pieces into smaller ones. It’s probably gross that Nicole talking to the other woman gets her like this, but she’s never been able to help it so she stopped trying. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Such bullshit.” Shae mumbles, noticing when Nicole comes back through the door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>None of them are talking when she comes back to the table and she knows why. It happens every time she answers a call from her ex. Wynonna is better at hiding her annoyance than Shae is, though. Except for the pile of ripped up paper on the table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Geez, what’d that label do to you?” Nicole tries to joke, taking Wynonna’s hands away from the paper and holding one. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her hands are cold from being outside and Wynonna’s are hot from her jealousy and anger. Her face reddens and her jaw relaxes when Nicole takes her hand. In this moment, she hates how easily Nicole’s touch can soothe her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Did you tell your girlfriend ‘hey’ for me?” Wynonna tries to sound like she’s joking. Maybe it works, maybe it doesn’t. Maybe the joke hurts to say more than she wants to admit. Her eyebrow raises and her voice is softer than it was before when she looks up at the redhead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole rolls her eyes so hard Wynonna can only see white. “Fuck offff, I can’t believe you just said that.” Nicole shakes her head and thinks about taking her hand away from Wynonna’s. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t pull away from me, it was a joke. Your hands need to warm up.” Wynonna warns her, her voice softening even more by the end of her sentence. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna had looked pretty pissed before, but now she looks almost pitiful. She’s so fucking happy to be holding Nicole’s hand, even if Nicole got up from dinner to go talk to her shitty ex. Even if she isn’t Nicole’s girlfriend. Even if neither of them will ever admit their feelings. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae doesn’t think she can stand to sit and watch it anymore right now. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She’s not your girlfriend so why do you still jump and run every time she calls?” Shae doesn’t try to hide her annoyance behind a joke. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s jaw tightens and her eyebrows wrinkle. “Why are you being like that? She’s just my friend.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Some friend.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What’s that supposed to mean?” </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“Nicole, come on. You know she doesn’t fucking like any of us. Least of all Wynonna.” Shae motions to the smaller woman Nicole is holding hands with. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know she’s not perfect, okay? I know she’s mean. Why do you think we broke up? God, I didn’t know talking to her on the phone every once in a while was this big of a deal.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not. You’re a big girl, Nic. You can talk to whoever you want.” Shae slips her card into the waiting bill holder and folds her hands on the table. “I just don’t like the way she is to Wyn. Your best fucking friend. I don’t know how you keep putting up with it either.” Shae sounds more hurt than annoyed now, like she’s really trying to understand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna stays quiet and chews her lip. She won’t say it right now, but she’s grateful for this. For Shae and the way she’s sticking up for her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She hasn’t been around in forever. Not since last time. And I don’t put up with it, I talked to her about that. Bitched her out, actually. I told her I don’t fuckin’ like the way she treats Wynonna. That she has no reason to be such an ass to her. I told her not to let it happen again.” Nicole tries to explain.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae takes in a deep breath and lets it out, her eyebrows quirking as she shrugs. “I guess that’s a good step.” She admits, looking to Wynonna for a second and then back to Nicole. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, okay? It just -– pissed me off.” Shae apologizes, reaching out and touching Nicole’s free hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole squeezes her other best friend’s hand and nods. “It’s okay, you don’t need to be sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t explain that. Must have seemed like such a dick.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, you kinda did, but as long as you’re really done letting her be an ass to you and Wynonna and everyone else… I’ll excuse your dick-ness.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole laughs and so does Shae. Wynonna smiles too and tries to still enjoy the feeling of Nicole holding her hand. Tries not to let herself believe that it means nothing, since she’s holding Shae’s now too. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Not the same way she’s holding yours, never the same way she holds you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Wynonna thinks. She pushes that thought away almost as soon as it comes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae and Nicole argue briefly over who is actually gonna pay the bill before the waiter comes. Wynonna doesn’t catch which of them wins. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are</span>
  <em>
    <span> you</span>
  </em>
  <span> okay?” Nicole turns to Wynonna and asks. Her voice is so sincere and soft, Wynonna feels like she’s breaking open again. She just wants to be back in Nicole’s bed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I –– yeah, Red. Five by five.” Wynonna’s grin is sideways and it shows her dimples. It’s enough to make Nicole’s eyes soften and shine. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Swear?” Nicole leans in closer to Wynonna’s face and cocks an eyebrow. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I swear, dummy.” Wynonna chuckles elbows her, finally and reluctantly letting go of her hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Let’s get outta here and go get donuts. I’ll buy.” Wynonna shoves her hands into the pockets of her jacket and waggles her eyebrows. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole holds the door open for all of them and gets stuck holding it for a few more older ladies. Wynonna catches up to Shae once they’re in the parking lot and links their arms. “Heeey..” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What’s up?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing. Well. Just.. Thanks. For that, back there.” Wynonna says softly, swallowing hard. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She hopes that doesn’t sound like she’s admitting anything. She isn’t ready to admit anything, not to herself, not to anybody. Still, she’s grateful for her friend defending her against Nicole’s wicked witch of an ex-girlfriend. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No problem, Wyn. I got you.” Shae nods. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna pulls her arm back and offers her fist to Shae who bumps it with her own just as Nicole is walking up to them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her hands are shoved in the pockets of her denim jacket and her nose is already red again from the cold. Wynonna looks up at her with stars in her eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You guys coming up with a secret handshake? Thought that was our thing?” Nicole looks almost hurt when she looks down at Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nah, that’s definitely all for you guys.” Shae laughs, taking Cleo’s hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Good.” Nicole smirks, nudging Wynonna with her elbow. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“Besides, you’re insane if you think I could remember two handshakes.” Wynonna scoffs, making Nicole laugh. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Once they’re done eating, Waverly opts to go back to her keyboard. Rosita seemed normal and happy when they were eating and talking, but most of their conversation kept going back to the band. It was as if Rosita was making sure not to say anything about just the two of them. Nothing that would ease Waverly’s mind. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The younger woman loses herself in the song she’s writing and tries to pretend for a little while that the most beautiful woman she’s ever seen isn’t sitting in the room with her and like she </span>
  <em>
    <span>doesn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>have a crush on said beautiful woman.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once Waverly starts working again, it’s hard for Rosita to do anything besides watch her. She tries to be secretive about it, only looking when Waverly isn’t. For a long while, she starts to believe that the pianist has really forgotten she’s there. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly is beautiful all the time, but especially so when she’s lost in her work this way. Rosita can see her mouthing some words as she plays. She watches the way Waverly nibbles on the end of her pen between writing things down. Every small mannerism brings a sort of stupid smile to Rosita’s face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Every time she lets herself begin to feel anything for this woman, she soon after reminds herself that she shouldn’t. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You look like you’ve got something.” Rosita speaks up after a bit, eager to hear what Waverly is coming up with. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly looks up from her paper and smiles. It reaches her eyes and Rosita melts. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think –– well, maybe. I thought of some things. Some words.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita’s computer makes a sound that pulls her attention away from Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, just a sec, Waves…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ouch.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Again. Waverly sighs and nods, trying not to feel too hurt. She watches Rosita read over the email and notices the way her eyes widen and her eyebrows lift, specifically the right one. Why is everything about this woman so sexy and beautiful? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I – have to go, actually. I’m sorry, Waves.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Is it bad?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What? No! I just got an email about a meeting, that’s all.” Rosita sounds sincere as she moves to pack up her computer and things. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly tucks her pen behind her ear and shakes her head, feeling only slightly relieved that it’s a meeting calling her away. The aching sadness surrounding everything else still pulses inside of her. She crosses her arms over her chest and nods. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh. Okay. That’s good? Hopefully?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hopefully.” Rosita grins and her soft cheeks make Waverly swoon. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She softens, her shoulders slumping as she nods some more. “Okay. Well, spending time with you was – was really nice.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I enjoyed it, too. I like watching you while you work.” Rosita admits, putting her bag on her shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The way her voice sounds and the way she says it makes Waverly think for a moment that she might mean it… like that. She doesn’t want to get her own hopes up too high off of one sentence, though. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The younger woman smiles brightly and bites her lip. “Thanks. And thanks for lunch again, too.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No problem, Waves. I’ll see you soon, okay? Hopefully, with some really good news.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fingers crossed. Be safe out there, okay?” Waverly holds up her crossed fingers cutely before she starts to fidget while saying the ending to Rosita. Ever since the accident, she always worries. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I will. You be safe, too, okay?” Rosita returns, looking at Waverly softly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I will. Bye, Rosie.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Bye, Waves.” Rosita smiles and heads out, leaving Waverly alone in the practice space. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It feels different than it did when she got here. Standing here alone now, Waverly just feels hollow. She lets out a heavy breath and takes her notebook to the couch, plopping down in the place she’d been sitting before. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita’s smell still lingers over here and Waverly knows it’s stupid but tears well up in her eyes. Maybe they’re angry, or sad, or something else –– she doesn’t really know. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She stops trying to figure it out and just cries, quietly and alone with her head leaned back against the couch, breathing in Rosita’s smell over and over. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. i don't care</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Rosita has news at their next practice.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>The next day </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna sits on the couch with her feet propped up on the coffee table, watching Waverly continue to primp herself in the mirror. Her head rolls to the side against the back of the couch towards the digital clock in their living room. Waverly’s been at it for five uninterrupted minutes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Waverlyyyyyy,” Wynonna groans dramatically. “Is this meeting a date for you or something? We’re going to practice. Your hair looks fine. Your necklace is perfectly placed. Can we please just go?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly stops and turns towards her big sister. If looks could kill… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We can’t all have perfect hair and look good in old t-shirts and jeans! Sorry, it takes me a little bit of effort to look cute!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rising to her feet, Wynonna rolls her eyes. “You look goddamned adorable. Rosita’s gonna kiss you on the spot. Now, can we please go?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly checks herself one last time in the mirror and sighs. “Fine.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you know what this meeting is about, though?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why would I?” Waverly sounds annoyed when she asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Geeze, I was just asking. What crawled up your ass?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly walks ahead of her sister out of their place and doesn’t answer. What crawled up her ass? Rosita fucking Bustillos being perfect and not even giving her the time of day. She doesn’t want to talk to Wynonna about the fact that she spent so long in the same place with Rosita </span>
  <em>
    <span>alone </span>
  </em>
  <span>yesterday and got absolutely nowhere with the woman for a multitude of reasons. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her bandmates tease her about her crush on their manager, but she knows that none of them actually want her to pursue it. Waverly doesn’t care, though. They’re both adults and Waverly hasn’t felt this kind of pull towards someone since… Maybe ever. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s emotions on the matter fluctuate between sadness and anger whenever she thinks about it for too long. Right now, she’s more on the angry end of the spectrum. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna doesn’t push it any further and drives to practice in silence. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>When the sisters enter the space, Nicole’s handing coffee to Shae and Rosita. Wynonna grins wide when those brown eyes land on them and Nicole’s lips curl into a lopsided smile of her own. Waverly, on the other hand, stays tight lipped. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What’s up, Waves?” Nicole asks, handing the woman her iced hazelnut latte with almond milk. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing.” Waverly takes the drink and sips it, looking past Nicole at Rosita and Shae chatting without a care in the world. She pushes an annoyed breath out of her nose and rolls her eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole turns to Wynonna with a curious expression. Wynonna takes her iced black coffee and shakes her head, signalling for her best friend to drop it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Has Rosita said anything about what our </span>
  <em>
    <span>meeting </span>
  </em>
  <span>is going to be?” Wynonna asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nope. She wanted to wait until we were all here. I’m guessing it’s good, though. She seems kinda jittery.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course she does,” Waverly comments, still looking past and staring at the other woman. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna and Nicole wince in unison and shake their heads. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh! Waves!” Rosita finally says and walks over to them as well. The smile on her face is absolutely infuriating… And so incredibly </span>
  <em>
    <span>beautiful. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly feels like she might explode. The manager continues, “I came back yesterday hoping you’d still be here, but you were already gone.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>All at once, Waverly’s entire demeanor shifts. The tightness in her shoulders melts away. She sags in the same moment her lips turn up to one side. </span>
  <em>
    <span>A small smile. </span>
  </em>
  <span>“You came back?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once again, Nicole and Wynonna look to one another. They raise their eyebrows and do their best to stifle their grins. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, yeah! I only had to go to a meeting for a little while. I got some more work done, but I really was hoping to hear a few verses of that song you were working on. But… I’ll hear it soon enough, I’m sure.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly nods, eyes soft and shining. “Yeah, definitely.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna clears her throat. “So, what’s this meeting about? Are you kicking us to the curb already? Are you kicking one of us to the curb and making the rest of the band decide if we can go on without Haughty?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey!” Nicole nudges Wynonna with her shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I could never go on without you, Nicole.” Wynonna turns back to Rosita and whispers comically. “I totally could go on without her.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole wraps Wynonna up in her arms and squeezes her tight. “Take it back, asshole. Or I walk outta here right now.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh my god, she’s already threatening to quit! Pull the plug, Bustillos. She’s a loose cannon!” Wynonna jokes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, guys, c’mon… It’s good news. No, I’m not trying to kick anyone to the curb--especially not the one getting tons of views and visibility for the band on YouTube,” Rosita says through her laughs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna smirks and turns to look up at her best friend behind her. Nicole doesn’t move to let her go, but loosens her grip to a manageable embrace. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can we get this show on the road?” Shae calls out. She’s taken a seat on the couch and wears the same unamused look on her face she always takes on when Wyn and Nic start to act up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah! Okay so…” Rosita walks over and stands in front of the couch. Waverly falls into the spot beside Shae while Wynonna and Nicole finally break apart but remain standing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yesterday, I spent the day emailing and making some phone calls. Then, I went to a meeting…” Rosita begins to explain. The band listens with baited breath. “It was just a discussion about some options for you guys… But… Six Shooter wants to negotiate a record deal with you guys!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Remarks of surprise come from all four of them. Waverly springs to her feet and squeals. Shae leans forward with her arms on her knees and holds her hands out in front of her. Nicole pumps her fists out in front of her. Wynonna tries to stifle her grin again, but fails miserably when every single one of the people she cares most about shows their joy so evidently. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita soaks in the happiness of her band. Having worked with so many big artists before really has paid off and she couldn’t be happier that these are the women that she gets to help make it. With the following </span>
  <em>
    <span>Chasing Skylarks </span>
  </em>
  <span>already has from three years of hard work and the amount they continue to gain from their Julien Baker appearance… This record deal will only help them get paid even sooner. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna is the quietest about her happiness because she knows how record deals can go… Six Shooter has one of the better reputations in the business, but that doesn’t mean they won’t try to take advantage of “newbies.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, what’s the initial offer?” Wynonna asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“My friend is a really good entertainment lawyer and they’re going to help us with the details, but we’re going to try and get you a short-term deal and make sure we retain most of the merch and show revenue. Any non-record revenue, we’re going to try to hold onto, but Six Shooter really likes your sound and is willing to invest the money to produce the record and distribute it.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, blah blah blah… How long will it take us to make it back?” Wynonna asks, eyes narrowing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, you know I can’t tell you that, but with the reputation you guys are already building, we should recoup the initial cost and pay back what we have to pretty quickly. And they’re offering a twelve percent royalty rate after that.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole looks to Wynonna after Rosita says that. Shae and Wynonna share the brains of the business. Wynonna looks to the bassist who looks back at her. They stare at one another for a few seconds before Shae turns back to Rosita. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sounds good so far… When do we get to sit in on the meeting with them?” Shae speaks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ve reached out to try and set a meeting for Thursday of next week. That way, you all can get together on what you absolutely have to have here and what you won’t accept. But after my initial meeting, I think they’re playing a straight game here.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Disgusting, no deal,” Wynonna deadpans. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Everyone else chuckles. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are we keeping creative control here?” Nicole finally chimes in. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Seems it,” Rosita nods as she answers. “Like I said, they really like your sound and they don’t want to fuck with it. You’ll need at least seven more songs for your album compared to what you have on your EP. I know you have songs you haven’t recorded, but you’ll want to be thinking about what songs you want on this album.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The group nods in understanding. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, yeah, that’s where I ran off to yesterday, Waves. I’m sorry for running out. I just didn’t want to say too much yesterday in case it went south,” Rosita reasons. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, that’s okay,” Waverly says sweetly. “I get it.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, you guys get to practicing. I’m going to step out and make a couple more calls.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita smiles for a few more seconds, eyes lingering the longest on Waverly, before stepping outside of the space. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As they all walk towards their instruments, Wynonna catches Waverly by the arm and pulls her back to her, leaning in close. “Why didn’t you tell me you were with Rosita yesterday?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t think it was newsworthy…” Waverly shrugs, getting herself free from her big sister’s grip. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh huh… So what were you doing in here all aloooone for hoooours?” Wynonna wiggles her eyebrows. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Scoffing, Waverly crosses her arms over her body. She runs her tongue along the inside of her cheek, signalling her annoyance. It doesn’t faze Wynonna who still waits expectantly for the juicy details she knows are going to come--especially with how Waverly had been acting earlier. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wrote… She worked. That’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>it,” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly finally relents. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s it? Really? You didn’t try to--” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s the thing! I mean, I didn’t, like, jump her bones or anything, but I kept giving her openings to be all cute with me or damn </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything </span>
  </em>
  <span>but she just kept making </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything </span>
  </em>
  <span>about the band.” Waverly tells her sister in hushed tones--not only to hide from Rosita who is standing outside the door, but also from the other two women on stage tuning their instruments and strumming to warm up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, she is our manager, Waves,” Wynonna offers with a sympathetic smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t care!” Waverly proclaims more loudly than anything else she’s said before. “I know you guys don’t want me to--”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We really don’t,” Wynonna reminds her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly bites hard, making her jaw jut out. She wants to say </span>
  <em>
    <span>it’s not fair. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She wants to tell the rest of them to </span>
  <em>
    <span>go to hell. </span>
  </em>
  <span>But, she understands. She </span>
  <em>
    <span>hates </span>
  </em>
  <span>that she understands. “Well!” Waverly says with a bitter grin. “You don’t have to worry about it because Rosita didn’t fall into any of my cute little prompts or anything! She doesn’t see me like that, so…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna tilts her head, a sympathetic smile in place on her lips. “Baby girl… I know it sucks that she’s not giving you anything, but it’s probably for the best.” The elder sister considers for a moment, chewing on the inside of her lip. “For what it’s worth though, she definitely has a sweet spot for you, but she probably knows what we know. Not a good idea.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t care! </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly wants to scream again, but she doesn’t. There’s no use in arguing this. Unless some miracle of God happens and He steps out of the Heavens himself to declare the two of them soulmates, her bandmates aren’t going to be team Rosita and Waverly any time soon. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fine. Let’s just practice, then… And you stop hassling me about this shit every ten seconds if you’re just going to tell me to stop going for it,” Wavelry urges. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I cannot do that, kid. I’m the big sister. Hassling is like numero uno on the job descrip for big sister.” Wynonna shrugs. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Near the end of practice, Waverly plays the song she had worked on the day prior and guides the other women through her vision of the song, mimicking their instruments until they make the </span>
  <em>
    <span>real </span>
  </em>
  <span>music with their instruments the way that Waverly wants it to. She doesn’t sing the words just yet. </span>
  <em>
    <span>They’re still being perfected. </span>
  </em>
  <span>But, hearing the instruments all come together makes her smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita sits on the couch and watches them closely. She takes advantage of the band’s focus and gazes at Waverly freely. Seeing all of it come together after only hearing the keys yesterday is nothing short of magical. This song has to go onto the album, Rosita decides. She won’t push it, but the feeling the melody alone produces… It’s electric. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you guys want to practice anything else?” Nicole asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, I think we covered everything,” Shae decides. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The Earp girls nod in agreement. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita’s phone rings and she picks it up, speaking Spanish. Waverly does her best not to stare. It’s a language she can speak fluently, but she’s not sure if Rosita knows that or not. It’s probably not important either way. The woman is just talking to her mother, apparently. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna comes up beside Waverly and whispers in her ear. “What’s she saying?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly startles. She hadn’t even noticed Wynonna next to her until she asked. “She’s just catching up with her mom, I guess.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Does she know you speak Spanish?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know why she would,” Waverly whispers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sneaky sneaky… What’s she saying now?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wynonna, I’m not going to eavesdrop on--” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly stops when she hears their manager say </span>
  <em>
    <span>pianista.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Rosita’s talking about </span>
  <em>
    <span>her. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>eavesdropping now. Rosita calls her gorgeous and sweet. For one precious moment, Waverly’s heart swells.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then, it cracks. Again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita tells her mother that even though Waverly’s all of those lovely things, she’s her client. It seems her mother knows what that means because Rosita just sighs and says </span>
  <em>
    <span>exactly. </span>
  </em>
  <span>It’s nothing new, but… Waverly feels a renewed hope about them. Maybe… Maybe, they just need to know each other more. Rosita just needs to see that it’s not going to ruin anything. Even if they aren’t true love… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Waves?” Wynonna waves a hand in front of her face, drawing her attention away from their manager. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hmm?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What’d she say?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing. Band’s doing good. She misses her mom. Making plans to have dinner with her…” Waverly lies.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Boo! Nothing juicy… Oh well, at least she’s not talking about how obsessed with her you are.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly jabs her elbow into Wynonna’s rib. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole walks over and throws both her arms around both women. “You guys ready to jet? Shae says we should check out the new place that opened not far from her place. Cleo’s gonna meet us there.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Boo, fifth wheel again…” Waverly pouts. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You can’t be a fifth wheel when there’s only one couple, Waves.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly turns her attention to Nicole after her sister speaks. There’s that same sad look on her face she’s been seeing for years. Wynonna doesn’t even know she’s put it there. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“C’mon, Waves, we can make Wyn feel like the fifth wheel,” Nicole attempts to lighten her own mood. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Bullshit, that’s impossible. I’ll be getting all the attention from all of you. ‘Specially Shae. She loves me the most,” Wynonna teases. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, so Shae’s the one you run to at all hours of the night?” Nicole asks, offended. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sometimes… Ain’t that right, Pressman?” Wynonna calls over to Shae. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m almost sure whatever you said isn’t right, but to be fair, I wasn’t paying attention,” Shae answers, walking up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I was telling Haught you let me crash at your place at all hours of the night.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Have you ever even been to my flat, Wynonna?” Shae asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, see this is why Haught is my best friend. You don’t play along…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Boo hoo. Anyways, can we go?” Shae sighs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly turns to see Rosita hanging up the phone and packing her things. Her feet possess her and she walks away from the band without a word. Rosita looks up at her when her laptop is in place in her bag. The most perfect smile draws green eyes to those lips. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Excited about Six Shooter?” Rosita inquires warmly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hell yeah! I had a feeling when I found out they were going to be there… Call me hopelessly hopeful!” Waverly’s eyes twinkle at the double meaning behind her words. “We’re actually going to go celebrate… There’s a place near Shae’s that we’ve been wanting to eat at. It’s pretty new. Do you want to celebrate with us? It only seems right… You did offer me a big party yesterday when you landed us something big…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita straightens, bringing her bag up on her shoulder. Last time, Rosita shot her down. This time… Maybe… Waverly lets the silence continue despite her gut instinct to start rambling. Rosita looks past Waverly to the other women then back at Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly raises her eyebrows cutely and grins a little wider. Rosita can’t stop the laugh falling from her lips. She nods. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Does that mean? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly does her best not to get her hopes up before Rosita actually says something. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure, sounds fun,” the woman finally acquiesces. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wait, really?” Waverly brightens. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I think a record deal is worthy of a celebratory lunch with you guys. I’ll buy a round of drinks.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Score one for the gorgeous, sweet pianist. No fifth wheeling this time. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly nods. “Hey guys!” Waverly calls over her shoulder. “Rosie is gonna come eat with us! She’s even buying a round to celebrate.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna and Nicole lean into each other. In the same moment, they murmur “Rosie” under their breaths. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So much for Waverly not trying to fuck our manager, huh?” Shae says quietly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can you blame her?” Wynonna answers just as quietly. Before too much time can pass where they haven’t said anything the forbidden pair can hear, she calls towards them, “I love the way booze I don’t have to pay for tastes. Best day ever!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole rolls her eyes at the initial question. Selfishly, she gets more and more grateful every day for Waverly’s hopeless crush on their manager. It keeps Wynonna from trying to fuck the woman herself. Knowing Wynonna and the way everyone in the damn world wants her, Wynonna would have probably already succeeded in getting Rosita in bed. With Waves feeling the way she does, though, Wynonna will never. One less woman for Nicole to be irrationally jealous of.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Haught?” Wynonna breaks her train of thought. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You gonna give us a ride? Or should I drive?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole shakes her head. “I got you, Earp.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thanks, Haughtstuff. Let’s go see how many words Waves actually manages this time.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. i think (s)he knows</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>They meet with the label, meet fans, and Nicole finds Wynonna in a compromising situation.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Nicole pulls up with Wynonna and Waverly in her car. Rosita pulls in next. Finally, Shae pulls in. Cleo is standing out front on her cell phone, waiting for the group to get there. </p><p>Before the Earp sisters and Nicole get out, Wynonna turns in the passenger seat and stares her little sister down. </p><p>“What?” Waverly asks, genuinely bemused. </p><p>“Tell me the truth. Did something happen with you and Rosita yesterday? She has shot you down every time you invited her somewhere except for today.” </p><p>“Ooookay, I’m gonna go talk to Shae and Cleo,” Nicole draws out, but a ringed hand slams down on her shoulder before she can get out. She turns to Wynonna who looks at her with pleading blue eyes, but says nothing. </p><p>Instantly, Nicole understands. Wynonna wants her there to save a fight from happening. It doesn’t always work, but it works enough that Nicole stays put and even turns to Waverly herself. “It’s okay, Waves, you can tell us.” </p><p>Waverly crosses her arms over her chest and rolls her eyes indignantly. “Nothing happened. Nothing like that. Seriously.” All of her words are clipped. There’s an edge to them and the older women can tell that she’s trying her hardest not to bite their heads off. </p><p>A few seconds of silence pass and Waverly sinks back into the seat. “Look… I like Rosita. I’m not going to sit around and act like I don’t. We’re all adults here.” An intense, accusatory emerald stare alternates between Wynonna and Nicole. “If something happens, it happens. But you both will be so very pleased to know… I think she has some stupid personal code about not getting involved with clients. </p><p>Wynonna softens and tilts her head at her baby sister. That specially timed look isn’t lost on her. Waverly would never stop making remarks about her and Nicole. It makes the elder sister more sympathetic to the way Waverly feels. </p><p>“We barely know the woman, Waves,” Wynonna reminds her. “We’re gonna have to work with her for a long time, I think. She’s been fucking amazing at managing us. Listen… if you still really, <em> really </em>like her in a few months… I want you to be happy. But just… Don’t rush. And don’t make her rush either.” </p><p>Nicole has turned back towards Wynonna through her little speech. This Wynonna… The one that is reserved for Waverly (and <em> her, </em>she admits silently to herself)... This Wynonna is the real Wynonna. No walls. No bullshit. This Wynonna amazes Nicole every second. She leans her head against the headrest of her seat and smiles gently at the way Wynonna offers her support. </p><p>The redhead nods and turns back towards Waverly. “You know I got your back, Waves. But I don’t want you to get hurt. But. I think we should stick a pin in this convo, because the other three are staring at us and Cleo looks pissy. Plus, I’m starving.” </p><p>Waverly relaxes. The tension and defensiveness wash away together and she smiles. “Thank you guys. I really don’t want you all mad at me, but I can’t help who I like.” With that, she looks pointedly at Nicole. </p><p>Then, the conversation is over. The three of them join the others and they go inside to find a table.</p>
<hr/><p>The restaurant is busy, bustling, and so <em> loud. </em> Being new, it has a packed house. The atmosphere is perfect for the group, though. Each and every one of them share the same unspoken thought. <em> This will be our new place. </em>There are vegan options for Waverly which means she automatically loves it here. </p><p>Rosita sits at one short end of the table and Shae sits at the other. Wynonna and Nicole share one of the long sides and Cleo and Waverly sit next to one another on the other… With Rosita on Waverly’s right and Shae on Cleo’s left. </p><p>Their orders have been placed and drinks ordered. Rosita is the first to break the silence. “So. Do you guys have any ideas for songs you want to put on the album yet?”</p><p>Wynonna looks around the table and shrugs. “I think we know some of the fan favorites we play, but I think we’ll have to spend a session brainstorming something that will all go together.” </p><p>Nicole nods in agreement. </p><p>Shae adds, “Definitely. This album will be the thing that makes or breaks us. If it flops, people are less likely to listen to whatever we put out next. We need to make it a mix of fan favorites while making sure the vibe flows.” </p><p>“Exactly,” Wynonna agrees. </p><p>“Well, I don’t know if Waverly played any of what she was working on yesterday, but whatever it was… Sounded really fresh and <em> good,” </em> Rosita insists, flashing a grin at the pianist. Waverly turns the cup of water in front of her with both her hands and grins back. “Of course, I don’t know the lyrics because <em> someone </em> was mumbling under her breath. But, I know it’s great.” </p><p>Wynonna and Nicole cut their eyes at one another, then look to Shae. </p><p>“Wynonna usually helps me with the words,” Waverly says. </p><p>“Baby girl, <em> help </em> is a little generous when it comes to your songs. <em> You </em> help <em> me,” </em>Wynonna explains, turning to Rosita. </p><p>“Whatever! Without you, our songs wouldn’t be half as good!” </p><p>The rest of the table chuckle lightly at the sisters. “So ideas… But nothing absolute, yet,” Rosita remarks. </p><p>“Seems that way,” Nicole finally speaks. “I think we have enough to get at least the bones of the album… Might have to write a few more, but we’ll have a plan soon.” </p><p>The round of drinks Rosita promised arrives with the appetizers. The time passes and the six of them break into three different conversations, each obvious pair filling the space with casual conversation. </p><p>When their main dishes make it to the table, Rosita’s meal is something off the vegan menu, too. Waverly tilts her head as she claims the plate. </p><p>“I didn’t know you were vegan, too,” Shae comments from the other end of the table. </p><p>“Oh, I’m not!” Rosita informs them. “But, what I had with Waves yesterday was <em> so </em>good. I figured I should maybe broaden my horizons. I’m not making a total lifestyle change overnight, but maybe some day…” </p><p>The secret looks between Wynonna and Nicole are exchanged again. It could be a totally meaningless gesture… Both sets of their eyes land on the younger Earp across from them. The look on Waverly’s face is hopeless. </p><p>Nicole leans over to Wynonna when she sees the woman’s mouth part lightly. Right into Wynonna’s ear, Nicole simply whispers, “Don’t.” </p><p>Wynonna’s mouth closes slowly and she turns so that their faces are mere inches apart. “I wasn’t gonna poke fun,” she lies. </p><p>Nicole raises her eyebrows, clearly calling Wynonna’s bluff. </p><p>“Fine. Buzzkill.” </p><p>“You’ll thank me later.” </p><p>Cleo squeals and all attention turns to her. “Nic! Your video with Julien just passed <em> two-hundred thousand </em> views! And the one of you guys doing <em> Don’t Save Me </em>has almost a hundred thousand!” </p><p>“What?! No fucking way!” Wynonna’s voice is low and almost comical. “Haught!” Wynonna smacks her hand across Nicole’s arm. Nicole doesn’t budge. </p><p>The guitarist is frozen. Now, <em> her </em>mouth hangs open. </p><p>“Haught? Earth to Nicole Leigh Haught….” Wynonna snaps her fingers in front of Nicole’s face until she finally gets blinking and a shaking head. “That’s amazing. That’s so fucking amazing, Nicole. Two-hundred thousand views… That number is fucking astronomical… It’s going to hit a mil by next week, just wait.” </p><p>Nicole ducks her head, smiling shyly and dimples deepening. “That’s… whoa.” </p><p>“Wyn’s right,” Rosita chimes in. </p><p><em> Wyn? </em> The drummer thinks. <em> Oh no. </em> She looks to Waverly. <em> Sad Waverly. I hate sad Waverly. It’s just a fucking name, Waverly. Please… </em> But Wynonna knows. Waverly’s going from feeling special… Being <em> Waves </em> and getting Rosita to eat vegan dishes… To feeling small again. </p><p>Rosita continues, “Those are impressive metrics in a short time. Not sure about the one million, but maybe after your show this weekend…  More people will be searching… Anything’s possible.”</p><p>“My Haughty’s gonna get a million, easy,” Wynonna insists. </p><p>“If she gets a million, I’ll buy you another round of drinks, Earp,” Rosita promises. </p><p>“Oh you are <em> so on.” </em> Wynonna challenges with narrowed eyes. </p>
<hr/><p>Rosita walks into the room where the band waits to go on. The woman is practically vibrating and it brings them all to life, Waverly especially. </p><p>“Rosie, what is it?” Waverly asks, raising to her feet and taking a couple steps towards her. </p><p>“There are… so. many. people. here. You guys are the headliners, obviously, and I expected a better turn out after your show with Julien, but I didn’t expect this. It’s packed. I’m pretty sure this place is breaking all kinds of fire codes. There are people <em> waiting </em>in a line outside.”</p><p>“For us?” Nicole inquires. </p><p>Rosita nods. “The bouncer told me they sold every single ticket to the show, but they were going to stay open for people who just wanted to pay cover for regular business. They have to let everyone who has a ticket for the show in… The people who got here early are lucky, because the ones without tickets can’t even get <em> in.”  </em></p><p>“Holy shit.” Wynonna and Shae say in unison. </p><p>“I may be buying you a round of drinks soon.” Rosita smirks. “I hope I didn’t just freak you out. It’s still smaller than the Julien venue, obviously. I just wanted you to be prepared. The energy is going to be <em> insane </em> out there.” </p><p>Waverly shakes from her head to her toes and jumps in the air. The high-pitched squeal makes Rosita squint her eyes before flashing a wide smile. “Oh yeah, so we’re definitely getting paid tonight. We’re getting half of the <em> sold out </em>ticket sales and ten percent of the gen admission. So damn proud of you guys.” </p><p>Rosita’s phone goes off and she sees that Wynonna’s tweeted. </p><p><b>@crazychickwithadrum</b><br/>
wanna meet us after the show? find us by the side door. #ChasingSkylarks</p><p>“Wynonna…” Rosita glares.</p><p>The drummer lays on her best attempt at an utterly innocent expression. “Yeah, Rose?” </p><p>“Are you sure about this?” </p><p>Wynonna looks down at her phone. “Hmmm… It already has two-hundred likes. Oops!” </p><p>“What did you do?” Shae asks, unamused. </p><p>“Just told the people who dragged their asses out here… The ones standing outside <em> waiting </em>and missing the show… That they could meet us after.”</p><p>“Goddamn it, Wynonna,” Shae groans. </p><p>Wynonna stands up, impassioned by her promise. “Look, the best way to keep our momentum going is to build a presence. Online and off. Our fans need to feel fuckin’ connected to us. We gotta stay as attainable as we can. Taylor Swift has people over at her fuckin’ house, dude. We can hang out with a bunch of people outside a bar.” </p><p>Nicole smirks at the mention of Taylor Swift. Wynonna would always work in a Swiftie reference as many times as she could. “Fuck it, I’m in.”</p><p>“I’ll see if they have a security guy they could lend us…” Rosita sighs. “You’re not wrong. But, we’re going to make sure you guys are protected and can get out if it gets hairy. </p><p>Rosita’s phone buzzes again. </p><p><b>@crazychickwithadrum</b><br/>
don’t ruin it by being an asshole. keep it classy. got a show to do now. see ya soon #ChasingSkylarks</p><p>“Get the fuck out there.” Rosita shakes her head, but the smile on her face lets Wynonna know she’s not mad. </p><p>“This one’s for you, Bustillos. Can’t wait for those free drinks.” </p>
<hr/><p>Waverly, Nicole, and Shae swear to Wynonna that the building had been shaking the whole time they were playing. Wynonna, dripping sweat from giving her absolute all, throws her arms up. “Guess I didn’t feel it because I was right there with it! Fuck, that was awesome!” </p><p>Rosita wears a shit-eating grin when she greets them in the dressing room they’d been in before the show. “Wynonna… There’s… so many people out there. The owner feels indebted to us for the booming business, though, so they set up barricades while you were playing and we have a security guy. You’re welcome.” </p><p>“Ugh, I love when a plan comes together,” Wynonna says with a dreamy sigh. </p><p>“This is what you call a plan!?” </p><p>Waverly chimes in this time. “Believe it or not… That’s more notice than she gives most of the stunts she pulls.” </p><p>“Love it or leave it, Bustillos! I’m going to get hundreds of people to watch Haught’s video like hmmm eight-hundred thousand or so times!”</p>
<hr/><p>Meeting fans is everything Wynonna hoped it would be. The part of the job that she really loves… The one that she knows the feeling of all too well… Is the part where she gets to hear all of the stories about how much their music has helped people she’s never met. It’s easy to forget how easily music can impact a person. </p><p>It’s easy to sit in her room and think no one is listening and that no one cares. It’s so easy to forget. But she lives for this. She lives for the tweets she reads from the people who love her music. She lives for the odd person who recognizes her on the street and tells her a verse that she wrote touched their hearts. </p><p>She looks to her bandmates in the middle of the semi-organized chaos and they’re all riding that same high--even the reluctant Shae. Shae shines just as much as Waverly and Nicole. They’re all thriving. </p><p>Two full hours… They spend two full hours out there until they’ve talked to each and every person for at least a little bit of time. When the faces get familiar, Rosita comes out to break up the fun. </p>
<hr/><p>“So…” Rosita starts when they’re in the safety of the room once more. “Should we get a meet &amp; greet package together for all your shows?” </p><p>Wynonna considers it. “Fine. But I still want to offer it for people who can’t afford to drop all this money shit on us. Obviously the meet and greet can have something cool like a pic or something included, but I don’t want other people to feel like we’re money grabbing fucks.” </p><p>Rosita tilts her head. “We’ll talk. But I think tonight went well enough that I can get down with that.” </p><p>“Get down with it or not. You can’t stop me,” Wynonna informs her. Her tone isn’t mean or challenging. She’s stating a fact. </p><p>When Rosita smiles, Wynonna smiles back.</p>
<hr/><p>The band meets up at Nicole’s apartment on the day of their meeting with the record label. The four of them walk to the train station with their hands shoved in their jacket pockets. Waverly thinks that if anyone else is nervous, she surely can’t tell. </p><p>Wynonna and Shae are huddled together talking about technical stuff, what they’ll do in certain situations or with certain offers. Waverly hangs back and talks quietly with Nicole about the song she’d been working on. When she gets quiet, Nicole can tell she’s feeling nervous so she holds her hand. </p><p>“Waves?” </p><p>“Hm?” </p><p>“If we – all of us and uh – Rosie and Cleo, I guess – were fictional characters… who would we be?” Nicole asks. </p><p>It’s a completely random question. Probably the most random one Nicole could think of but she knows it’ll make Waverly laugh and get her mind off of the meeting and onto something else. </p><p>It seems to do the trick. Waverly rambles on about the possibilities all the way to the train and seems to forget about the meeting entirely. </p><p>They don’t have to wait long for the train but the car is pretty full when they get on. Wynonna and Nicole give the two open seats to Waverly and Shae. Shae occupies Waverly’s mind this time by showing her some video on her phone that makes them both laugh. </p><p>Nicole stands strong, holding onto the pole with one hand. The other is around Wynonna who leans into her chest, her head resting on her shoulder. Once again, Nicole knows that anyone who sees them will think they’re together maybe as much as she wishes they were. </p><p>Regardless, she’s more than happy to have Wynonna leaning on her and muttering close to her ear about things they might encounter in the meeting. Wynonna’s the brains when it comes to industry stuff, but she lets everyone in and explains stuff to them without making them feel dumb.</p><p>Nicole knows that Wynonna probably doesn’t even think of herself as smart, but Nicole thinks Wynonna’s the smartest person she’s ever met. The way she’s lived, the things she’s had to see and do… Nicole doesn’t think anyone could be wiser or stronger, even on her bad days. </p><p>The train ride ends all too soon but Wynonna stays close to her with an arm around her waist while they walk to the building that their meeting is going to be in. Nicole drapes hers over Wynonna’s shoulders and tries to calm the sea of nerves she feels swelling inside of herself now. </p><p>Rosita is standing outside of the office building talking on her phone but she lights up when she sees them. </p><p>“That’s certainly just for Waverly.” Wynonna mutters under her breath. </p><p>Nicole nudges her and throws a smile back Rosita’s way. The last thing they need  is Waverly hearing Wynonna cracking jokes before their meeting and getting upset. </p><p>Rosita talks to them briefly before they all head in together and crowd into the tiny elevator up to Six Shooter’s office. Wynonna finds herself pressed up against Haught again, only this time her back is to Nicole’s front. </p><p>“Sunglasses off inside, or else you’ll look like a dick.” Nicole says softly, reaching to lift Wynonna’s sunglasses up onto her head. </p><p>Wynonna tilts her head back against Nicole’s shoulder and smirks when she finds Nicole’s still in place on her face. “Speak for yourself, Haughty.”</p><p>“I’m getting there,” Nicole whispers back, her lips pulled to the side slightly. She keeps looking down at Wynonna as she moves her own sunglasses up to the top of her head. </p><p>“You happy?” Nicole says softly. It makes Wynonna shiver and all she does is nod before the elevator slows to a halt and dings signaling their arrival. </p><p>Wynonna would be lying if she said she didn’t feel pretty powerful stepping into this room right now. It feels different than the first time they went in for their EP. All of that had been tainted by her mother’s involvement. This was something that they got on their own. Now, surrounded by the people she loves most in the world, it doesn’t really feel like anything can go wrong. For her, that’s a strange thing to feel and it surprises her. It also ignites her. </p><p>They take their seats and Wynonna, Shae and Rosita control the meeting. Every condition from Six Shooter is met with careful consideration and questioning from the band. Wynonna feels proud when Waverly sits up and asks the things she wonders about. She can see it on Rosita’s face that she’s a little surprised by it, or maybe that’s just the adoration the manager has for the pianist. </p><p>The meeting lasts just long enough. By the time it’s over, Wynonna feels better than ever. The looks on all of her girl’s faces tell her that they do, too. Just like that,<em> Chasing Skylarks </em> have their first record deal in the bag. </p>
<hr/><p>When the meeting is over, the gang goes for coffee at The Blue Door and Rosita tags along with them again. They hang there for about an hour before everyone has to go their separate ways to do one thing or another. Shae is taking Cleo somewhere. Nicole has promised to help one of her neighbors move in. Waverly wants to go shopping and is dragging Wynonna. Rosita has a meeting. </p><p>Hours later, after a pretty good shopping trip with her little sister, Wynonna is alone in her bedroom at home. The door is cracked, not closed all the way. Taylor Swift’s <em> Lover </em> album blasts through the speakers hooked up to Wynonna’s turntable. </p><p><em> I Think He Knows </em> starts to play and Wynonna drops what she’s doing and goes from just humming along to the previous track to singing out loud and moving around her room.  </p><p>She dances freely, letting the energy of the day and their success wash over her. Letting her feelings for Nicole that she can’t help but be reminded of when this song plays wash over her. Here, alone in her room, she can do that.  </p><p>The music pounds so loudly in her ears and her focus is so intensely on the words to the song that she doesn’t even notice the tall redhead leaning against her bedroom door frame. </p><p>Nicole can’t believe her eyes. Wynonna’s dancing like nobody’s watching. She guesses that it’s because nobody <em> had </em> been watching before she snuck in. Her cheeks feel hot and she shakes her head softly, unable to keep the grin off her face as she watches the older woman move. </p><p>Not only is she completely lost in a carefree moment, not letting the entire weight of the world linger on those beautiful shoulders for a little while, but she’s got her hair all tied up and she’s wearing Nicole’s old Dolly Parton t-shirt. From what Nicole can tell, she doesn’t have any pants on underneath, either. </p><p>Wynonna looks incredibly beautiful and sinful no matter what she has on. There’s just something about seeing her like this, in Nicole’s shirt, that makes her body ache to hold her. </p><p>Finally, the brunette feels eyes watching her and her head jolts towards the door where she finds her best friend, grinning like an idiot. Wynonna’s shoulders slump, the initial anxiety of being watched melting away with one look into those brown eyes. Her lips pull to the side and she rolls her eyes, cheeks burning hot as she slouches off to the record player and making the music stop. </p><p>“Naughty Haughty…” Wynonna shakes her head, turning back to the redhead. “How fucking long have you been creeping on me?”  </p><p>Nicole takes this as her cue to step more into the bedroom, grin still firmly in place. “Well, it would’ve been rude to interrupt. Nice shirt, by the way.” Nicole’s voice is sweet and that big dumb smile is audible in every word. </p><p>Wynonna can’t even keep herself from laughing. She looks down at the white Dolly Parton t-shirt and feels herself redden a little again. It’s the one Nicole was wearing the first time they met. Wynonna doesn’t know exactly how it got into her bedroom, but by now it’s not new for them to end up with each other’s clothes. </p><p>“Thanks, I can’t remember where I got it.” Wynonna shrugs, trying to sound convincing. </p><p>“Looks like it belongs to a giant on you, <em> Swiftie </em>,” Nicole teases, sinking into the big comfy chair that sits off to the side of Wynonna’s room. </p><p>“Fuck you.” Wynonna chuckles, turning away from her best friend and going to pick up the things she’d abandoned for dancing. </p><p>The drummer bends over and picks up the few pieces of clothing and her cell phone that had apparently slipped off the bed. When she reaches, the t-shirt rides up just enough to prove to Nicole that she’d been so right. </p><p>Wynonna’s just in a seafoam green pair of her <em> stupidly sexy panties </em> underneath. They do barely anything to cover Wynonna’s ass, especially when she bends like that. It’s all Nicole can do not to groan. She feels like she’s on fire and immediately drops her face to her hand when Wynonna stands up and turns back to her. </p><p>“So, did I forget about something orrrrr… did you just get the <em> tingles </em> that you’d find me without pants on so you came over?” Wynonna quirks an eyebrow and asks, stalking back towards the taller woman. </p><p>Nicole tries to collect herself and not sound completely flustered. It’s like Wynonna can read her goddamn mind sometimes. <em> She knows you were looking, dumbass. </em>Nicole knows that’s probably impossible, but it doesn’t stop her from thinking it. </p><p>“I– um– h-how do you know it’s not both?” Nicole offers, rubbing her hand against her chin as she looks up at Wynonna, feigning innocence the best she possibly can. </p><p>Both of Wynonna’s eyebrows shoot upward at that. The smirk on her lips becomes even more devilish somehow. Strong arms lift high above her head and she pushes up on her toes, stretching her back and making a soft sound as she does. </p><p>God, it just keeps getting worse. The t-shirt lifts up as Wynonna stretches, showing off those stupid panties with their stupid lace sides and Wynonna’s perfect abs. Nicole feels like she’s going to melt completely at any given moment. </p><p>“Hmm… so you were just being naughty and trying to sneak up on me… tsk tsk. What did I forget?” Wynonna sinks back flat on her feet and continues padding closer to the guitarist, a sexy sway in her hips that Nicole can’t help but notice. </p><p>Was this woman ever capable of <em> not </em>being sexy? In three whole years, Nicole has decided that she isn’t. There’s no way. The worst part is, she can’t tell if Wynonna is even doing it on purpose. </p><p>Nicole swallows hard, trying to keep herself together. She rolls her eyes and shakes her head, chewing on the inside of her lip. “You’re so full of shit.” Nicole breathes. Truthfully, she can’t recall why she’d come now. All she can think about is how Wynonna looks in her shirt, in those panties, dancing barefoot around her bedroom. </p><p>She doesn’t have to think for long because Wynonna’s hands are on either arm of the chair and their faces are close. “What? Can’t take a joke? Don’t know how to have fun?” Wynonna pouts mockingly. </p><p>This earns a reaction from Nicole. Both of her eyebrows raise and her mouth parts just so. Muscular arms cross over her chest and she sits up in the chair. It brings their faces closer, but she refuses to back down. </p><p>“<em>Oh</em>, I think <em> you </em>of all people know how fun I am.” </p><p>“Do I? Maybe I think you’re boring.” Wynonna swallows hard, unable to hide the way being so close to Nicole affects her. She hopes it’s at least hidden enough from the woman herself. </p><p>“Maybe you should take that back.” Nicole challenges, narrowing her eyes. </p><p>“Maybe you should make me, Haughty.” Wynonna’s voice is barely more than a whisper. A sexy, teasing whisper. </p><p>Those words go all the way through Nicole and settle between her legs. Before Wynonna knows it, a wide grin spreads across the redhead’s face and her eyes seem to shine. </p><p>“Oh, you’re really gonna regret saying that…” Nicole chuckles. </p><p>She watches Wynonna’s eyes widen as she tries to turn and run but Nicole grabs her hips and stands up in one fluid motion. Wynonna yelps in surprise as big, strong hands are on her, pushing her back towards her bed. She doesn’t really have any chance against Nicole, not that she would want to. </p><p>They’re both already laughing before Wynonna’s back hits the mattress. Nicole pushes her down into it to hold her and climbs up, her thighs on pinning Wynonna’s hips against the bed. She uses both of her hands to start furiously tickling up and down the woman’s sides.</p><p>“Oh! Ni-i-cole!” Wynonna laughs<em> so </em> loudly.  </p><p>Her nose scrunches up beautifully as she laughs from deep in her chest, pushing weakly against Nicole’s chest. She’s not trying to get away, not really. She feels… weakened. By both Nicole’s presence and her weight on top of her. </p><p>When Nicole looks down, Wynonna’s eyes are squeezed shut and she’s laughing and grinning so hard that her dimples are so deep. Nicole decides for the millionth time in her life since she’s known Wynonna that she never wants to see anything else. </p><p>“Alright!!! Alright, I take it back, Nicole! I take it back, please!!!! I can’t— you’re fun! You’re fun! Fuck’s sake, you’re fun!” Wynonna begs through laughter. </p><p>Nicole’s jean covered thigh slips between Wynonna’s legs as she adjusts her hold on her. There’s a small but noticeable sound that falls from Wynonna’s lips when Nicole feels her hips push softly against her thigh. The big t-shirt is pushed up, revealing so much of Wynonna’s delicious skin. Nicole burns from the inside and lifts an eyebrow, licking her lips. <em> Fuck, she’s so hot… Is this? Are we?  </em></p><p>“Are you sure? You think I’m fun? Or do you need <em> more </em> to be sure?” Nicole taunts lowly instead of pressing on. Instead, she resorts to tickling her some more, just so she can hear that loud, beautiful sound again. </p><p>Wynonna’s neck flexes as she strains and squirms to get out from under her. She looks up, unable to stop laughing. “Nic! C’mon!” Wynonna pouts, pushing her hips up just hard enough to pretend she’s trying to throw Nicole off. </p><p>It doesn’t work. Nicole rolls with the motions and laughs through it, grabbing her hands and holding her down harder. They’re both laughing so hard they can’t breathe when Wynonna looks up, completely pleading. Nicole falters, her grip on Wynonna weakening just a little. </p><p>“Fuck, how fun do you want me to think you are?” Wynonna whines, her heavy laughter subsiding slowly into giggles. </p><p>Nicole drops her hands altogether and rolls off of Wynonna to lay beside her instead. Their heads rest against one another’s and they just lay there, laughing softly and trying to catch their breath until they’re okay again. </p><p>The back of Wynonna’s hand brushes against Nicole’s and she wants to take it, but she stops herself. She watches Nicole’s chest heave and those lips that had been so close and thinks about kissing her. She doesn’t do that either. <em> You can’t fuck this up, especially not now. The band just got a record deal. You just got onto Waverly for a crush. </em> </p><p>Still, the sight of Nicole like this makes her feel soft and warm inside. Her lips pull into a soft grin and she breaks the silence. “Seriously though, Haught... Did you just miss me or...?” </p><p>Nicole tilts her head to see Wynonna but it isn't enough. She turns over onto her belly and props up on her elbows so that she can look down at Wynonna. It feels a little bit like when they were in the elevator earlier. </p><p>Short red hair hangs in her face but all she can see is Wynonna. Wynonna and that smile. Wynonna and those dimples. Wynonna and those blue fucking eyes. She’s so beautiful. Nicole really can’t remember why she’d come over, if she’d ever had a reason. <em> Did she need one?  </em></p><p>“I – <em> fine </em>. You caught me. I just missed you.” Nicole admits softly, sweetly. </p><p>Wynonna’s smile gets impossible wider. It’s the kind of smile only Nicole ever gets to see. She ducks her head away for a moment as heat creeps up her neck, but looks back to Nicole before too long.</p><p>“I missed you, too…Loser.” Wynonna bites her lip, her voice sounds like honey.</p><p>They look at one another like that for far too long. Finally, Wynonna clears her throat. “Do I have to put on pants or do you just wanna hang here?” </p><p>“No, you… here is good. It’s good.” Nicole’s voice is still so gentle, like she’s still under Wynonna’s spell. Completely intoxicated by her. <em> You’ve been like that since you met her </em>, Nicole reminds herself. </p><p>Her eyes lock onto Wynonna’s lips and she knows if she looks for too long she’ll do something stupid. She’ll do what she’s wanted to do for years. So she pulls herself upright with a heavy sigh and bends to take off her boots instead. </p><p>They fall into an easy rhythm after that. Nicole settles back against the pillows of Wynonna’s bed and makes herself comfortable before nudging Wynonna to come join her. The smaller woman settles comfortably against Nicole’s side and sighs at the immediate comfort.</p><p>They watch videos and scroll through Twitter on Nicole’s phone for a while before Nicole notices Wynonna’s breathing has evened out. The redhead smiles softly down at her feeling like her heart is going to come out through her shirt. </p><p>She moves slowly and gently to pull up the covers, careful not to disturb the sleeping woman. Wynonna breathes in a sharp breath through her nose and makes a tiny, whimpering sound as she tightens her grip on Nicole’s waist and buries her nose against her neck. </p><p>Hours pass and Wynonna stays sleeping soundly against Nicole’s chest. The younger woman spends some of the time watching her and some of it writing some parts of a song that come to her in the notes on her phone. </p><p>“Hey, you two still in here?” Waverly’s voice cuts through the silence and Nicole startles slightly. The youngest Earp appears in the doorway and when she sees them her face softens immediately. Wynonna begins to stir, but Nicole holds her closer. </p><p>“Shhh…” Nicole says softly, running her fingers through Wynonna’s hair that she’d taken down before falling asleep. It soothes the woman right back into a peaceful sleep and her fingers twist in Nicole’s shirt. </p><p>The redhead looks up at Waverly who’s still watching with soft pleading eyes and a shy smile. </p><p>“I’m sorry, I – It got pretty loud for a bit then it got all quiet. I wasn’t sure…” Waverly whispers. </p><p>Nicole reddens at the memory of them laughing and yelling a little while ago and shakes her head. “She fell asleep… didn’t wanna wake her.” Nicole explains just as quietly. </p><p>When Waverly takes the time to study the way Nicole looks at her sister, she sees more love than she ever thought was possible. It almost makes her want to cry. Wynonna has always been so strong, taking care of her through impossible things. Here in Nicole’s arms, she looks so small and breakable. But she won’t break, not like this. Nicole would never let that happen. </p><p>All Waverly can do is smile at her friend. She knows. God, does she know. She wishes just as much as Nicole does that Wynonna would just give up and be with her. <em> It could be like this all the time, </em> Waverly thinks. </p><p>“Well, I – I’m gonna make dinner, okay? I’ll text you when it’s all ready.” Waverly’s smile reaches her eyes and it makes Nicole feel even happier. She just nods in agreement and Waverly leaves for the kitchen. </p><p>An hour and a half more passes before Nicole gets the text alert from Waves. Even though she’s been laying with Wynonna for hours, waking her up still feels so wrong. </p><p>She locks her phone and puts it to the side, wrapping both arms around the smaller woman and brushing her hair away from her face softly. </p><p>“Hey… ‘Nonna? Wake up…” Nicole coos sweetly, trying not to scare her or make her think somethings wrong. </p><p>The older woman stirs slowly, stretching her legs and toes under the covers and then lifting her head and blinking. “Huh? Mm... when did I? When did I fall asleep?” She yawns, rubbing at her eyes with the back of her hand. </p><p><em> God, she looks so beautiful like this, too, </em> Nicole thinks. She probably looks absolutely dorky and hopeless but she can’t help it. “Just a few hours ago. I guess it was good sleep?”  </p><p>“Mmm… <em> best </em> sleep. Did you sleep, too?” Wynonna stretches a little more before wrapping her arm tighter around Nicole. </p><p>“Mm-mm.” Nicole shakes her head. “Wasn’t tired. Wrote a little on my phone.” She keeps her voice soft, matching Wynonna’s sleepy tone. </p><p>“Can I see?” Wynonna perks up a little. </p><p>“Not yet... soon though.” Nicole chuckles, stretching the arm that had been holding her phone up over her head. </p><p>Wynonna just rests there for a moment, still waking up all the way. After a while, she props her head up on her elbow and looks down at Nicole. </p><p>“You let me sleep on you for hours?” </p><p>“Yeah?” Nicole says it like it’s obvious. Why in the world wouldn’t she let Wynonna sleep on her whenever she wanted? </p><p>Wynonna smiles and shakes her head. “<em> Softie </em>... thanks. Last night was a rough night’s sleep.”</p><p>“Nightmares?” </p><p>“Mhm.”</p><p>“You know you can call me. Or come over. Like always. ”</p><p>“Didn’t wanna wake you up again. You have to get your beauty sleep, too.” </p><p>“Too bad. Call me next time. Or just come over... I’ll come over if you call. We’d both sleep better anyway.” </p><p>Wynonna’s entire body softens. She wonders if it feels obvious to Nicole’s body. Her fingers finally let go of the fabric of Nicole’s t-shirt and smooth it down. She doesn’t give an answer, but she knows she doesn’t have to. </p><p>“I only woke you because Waves made dinner.” Nicole tells her, moving to sit up and stretch her own body. Wynonna watches the way those arms flex with her movement and tries to catch her breath. “We better get in there, you know how she gets.” </p><p>“You lied to me, Haughty.” Wynonna narrows her eyes, sitting up beside her and pushing her wild hair behind her ears. </p><p>“Huh?” </p><p>“You said no pants. Can’t eat dinner without pants.” </p><p>“Says who?” </p><p>Wynonna seems to consider it for a moment before shrugging and pushing the blankets off of her. “You’re right.” </p><p>Nicole laughs and shakes her head, forcing herself out of the bed. Wynonna follows closely behind.</p><p>“Since I won the tickle fight I’ll give you a chance to beat me at something else… race me to the kitchen.” Wynonna doesn’t give Nicole time to answer or respond before she takes off down the hall, laughing. </p><p>“What?! Okay, you <em> so </em> didn’t win the ti–– Wynonna!” Nicole calls, running after the woman she loves. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. you should be sad</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In the past, Wynonna deals with a bad relationship, both with a significant other and her mother. She has to make an impossible choice.</p><p>In present day, Nicole helps Wynonna cope like she has for the last couple years. </p><p>CHECK NOTES FOR CONTENT WARNING REFERENCES.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Content warning: This chapter references Wynonna's past abusive relationship. A shove is referenced, but nothing else physical takes place. This chapter also deals some of the mental abuse that Michelle puts Wynonna and Waverly through. This chapter goes through Wynonna's journey of the emotional process and aftermath of having an unwanted abortion. </p><p>Please read with care. Nothing graphic is described, but deals heavily with the emotions and way it feels to not have a whole lot of options or be able to do what Wynonna actually wants. </p><p>I am sorry if the above is rambling, but I want our readers to be warned as best as you can.</p><p>SONG: You Should Be Sad by Halsey (but we are saying Wynonna wrote it in this AU)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> Six Years Ago - 2014  </em>
</p><p>Waverly comes home from school and slams the door behind herself. She’s wearing her cheerleading uniform and her long hair is pulled up in a big pretty bow. The fourteen-year-old makes a big show of slamming her backpack down and huffing before she notices that the house is quiet, like there’s no one home. </p><p>“Wynonna! Are you here?” Waverly yells, her voice echoing through the house. </p><p>She crosses her arms and stomps to the edge of the stairs, putting one foot on the bottom step and quirking an eyebrow as she looks up. </p><p>“Hello??? Wynonna?!” Again, there’s no answer. </p><p>Waverly is halfway up the stairs when she hears the voices from down the hall. They’re muffled by distance and a closed door, but Waverly rolls her eyes immediately. <em> Of course. </em> Wynonna’s boyfriend is over. </p><p>Waverly keeps climbing the stairs, on her way to beat on her sister’s door and give her hell for not coming to see her cheer. It wouldn’t be such a big deal, since Wynonna usually comes when she says she will, but this was supposed to be different. </p><p>Waverly had been telling the boy she has a crush on how cool her older sister is and how good she is at drumming for <em> weeks </em>. She promised him if he came to a game, Wynonna would be there. He showed up and Wynonna didn’t. </p><p>The closer she gets, the louder the voices get. Waverly can tell that Wynonna is crying and suddenly both her and Jonas are yelling. The door swings open as soon as Waverly gets to it and bumps her shoulder.</p><p>“Ow! What the heck is going on? Why are you crying?!” Waverly asks frantically. </p><p>When her wide green eyes find Wynonna, she’s standing on the other side of her bed in tears. </p><p>“Waves…” </p><p>“Oh, no. No, no, not this again.” </p><p>“Waverly!” </p><p>“Hey! Jerk-face! What did you do to my sister?!” Waverly goes to the doorway, yelling after him. As soon as the words leave her, she hears the front door slam downstairs. He’s already gone. </p><p>The younger girl feels like she’s vibrating from the inside out. The slight anger and embarrassment from earlier has dissipated and been replaced by this feeling. Absolute rage and fear for Wynonna. </p><p>Clenching and unclenching her fists, Waverly turns back to Wynonna and goes to her side. Her hand reaches for Wynonna’s arm and Wynonna winces, pulling her arm back. </p><p>“Wynonna, what happened? Did he – hurt you?” Waverly’s eyebrows pull together and her stomach starts to hurt. </p><p>Jonas hasn’t ever been good. Not even a little bit. He’s definitely never been good enough for Wynonna, but it seems like Waverly is the only one who can see that. </p><p>He’s a loser wannabe musician who Wynonna met at a show when she was 18. Since then, they’ve been off and on. Mostly off. Waverly is pretty sure he’s just using her sister for her talent, their connections, and their money and Wynonna pretends she doesn’t believe it, too.</p><p>The more time that passes, the more Waverly hates him. Wynonna barely seems to enjoy spending time with him anymore and always seems drained after every interaction. Things like this – arguments, Wynonna crying, hurting – have only gotten more common over the last year. </p><p>“It’s.. fine. It’s fine, Waverly. We were talking and – and he pushed me. I–I hit the edge of the dresser. He tried to apologize…” Wynonna scoffs the last word like it wasn’t much of an apology. </p><p>“He pushed you?” </p><p>“Yeah. But like I said, I’m fine. And he’s gone so it doesn’t fucking matter.” </p><p>“Wynonna, you’re hurt, we have to ––” </p><p>“No. I’ll have a bruise at most. Don’t worry about it. Don’t you –- aren’t you supposed to be at a basketball game?” </p><p>“Yeah, that’s already over.” </p><p>“Shit. I was supposed to go.. God, I’m sorry, Waves.” Wynonna’s hand smacks against her forehead and she sinks against the edge of her bed. </p><p>“No.. hey, no. Don’t worry about it. There’ll be other games. What – what were you talking about that got so intense?” Waverly sits down next to Wynonna and brushes her hair behind her ear. </p><p>She wipes Wynonna’s tears the best she can, but notices that they just keep falling. Waverly leans against Wynonna’s arm and waits for her to answer. She knows pushing won’t do anything, Wynonna will speak up when she’s ready. </p><p>Waverly knows everything there is to know about how to read her older sister. Since she was six, Wynonna has pretty much been all she’s had. After the accident and losing their dad and Willa, their mom was never the same. </p><p>Waverly has vague memories – Wynonna being the one to hold her close and hug her during the funeral. Wynonna reading to her and helping her learn how to read. Wynonna making dinner for her. Getting her ready for school. In all of that time, Waverly can’t remember a time when their mom did <em> any </em> of those things. </p><p>Wynonna finished high school, but barely. She was more worried about making sure Waverly got taken care of than anything else. The one thing their mom did for them was pay for whatever they needed and more. Money and material things weren’t love, though and both girls always felt the difference. </p><p>As far as Waverly was concerned, Wynonna would always get the credit for raising her. </p><p>Wynonna finally leans her head against Waverly’s and takes a deep, ragged breath. She waits a few more moments before she lifts her hand to wipe her own tears with the back of her fingers and sighs. </p><p>“I –- he showed up high. <em> Again </em>. I don’t even know what he was on still, he wouldn’t say. But he borrowed money the other day for stuff for a show. Show didn’t happen so I know he spent the money somewhere else. Whatever. I didn’t care about that, not really. I was –– trying to tell him something and he didn’t want to talk.” </p><p>Waverly can tell how she means that. “He didn’t… make you do anything you didn’t wanna do. Did he?” </p><p>Wynonna shakes her head, bringing her hand up to rub at her arm. “Nah. Not like that.” Wynonna confirms. </p><p>It doesn’t comfort Waverly much, but she breathes a small sigh of relief. The younger Earp moves her arm around her sister, holding her better. Waverly’s fingers move in gentle circles against Wynonna’s back. </p><p>“Tell me what happened next?” </p><p>“Finally I-I just came out with it. I said, <em> ‘Listen, dumbass, I think I might be pregnant.’ </em>”</p><p>Wynonna goes quiet and Waverly does too. Her eyebrows lift and she feels like the air has been knocked out of her. Pregnant. <em> Was – was Wynonna being serious? </em></p><p>Slowly, Wynonna turns to look at Waverly with more tears swimming in those bright blue eyes. The look alone tells Waverly all she needs to know. </p><p>“Oh, ‘Nonna…” Waverly pulls her close and Wynonna collapses against Waverly’s chest. </p><p>The older girl cries and she cries hard. It’s sounds she makes are so pitiful and she feels so small in Waverly’s embrace that it’s almost hard to believe that this is the woman who has been taking care of her forever. </p><p>“He got so mad. Said he doesn’t want anything to do with it. That I should get rid of it.” Wynonna shakes her head, choking on her tears. She lifts her head just enough to look at Waverly again. </p><p>“Wynonna…” Waverly breathes. </p><p>Wynonna cuts her off. “The worst part is… that I’m happy? I-I’m not <em> mad </em>. If it’s true, I don’t – I don’t think I wanna get rid of it.” Wynonna chokes out between her sobs. </p><p>That breaks Waverly’s heart completely in two. Wynonna is young with her whole life ahead of her. She’d already given up so much to take care of Waverly. But, Waverly decides, Wynonna should have what makes her happy and if it’s this maybe baby… Waverly will do all she can to help out. Tears start to slip down her cheeks, too, and for the longest time they just hold each other. </p><p>When Waverly finally speaks she tells Wynonna that it’ll be okay. They’ll figure it out. That first, she needs to know for sure. </p>
<hr/><p>Waverly cleans and puts some medicine on the small scrape that begins forming on Wynonna’s elbow from colliding with the dresser and Wynonna makes them dinner. While they eat, they decide to drive to the pharmacy that night and grab some tests. </p><p>It’s almost… <em> exciting </em>. The sisters sit facing one another with their knees pulled up to their chests in the empty bathtub while they wait for the test. </p><p>This is where Wynonna used to bring her to sit when their parents were fighting over whatever. It was really the only place they could never hear the arguing. Wynonna would tell her stories to make her stop crying. This time, Waverly tells Wynonna a story. </p><p>Wynonna knows what she’s doing as soon as she starts and she just rests her chin against her own knees and lets her. </p><p>When the timer on her phone goes off, Waverly reaches out for Wynonna’s hand and Wynonna looks towards the small stick resting on the edge of the tub with one eye open. </p><p>“Whatever it says, it’s gonna be okay. Okay?” Waverly says softly. Wise beyond her years. </p><p>Wynonna curses every bad thing that’s ever happened to cause them both to have to grow up as fast as they did, but especially Waverly. Her baby sister deserved only the best in life and she’d tried so hard to give her what she could. The fact that Waverly isn’t disappointed in her is more than enough. </p><p>Wynonna reaches for the test slowly and pulls it closer, finally picking it up and reading it. Her eyes widen first, then a soft smile starts to grow on her face. </p><p>“What??”</p><p>“Waverly…it’s – there’s two. There’s two lines.” Wynonna says, her voice getting louder and more excited with each word. </p><p>Waverly feels her heart pounding and she grins to match Wynonna’s. </p><p>“‘Nonna! That – that’s it! That’s –” Waverly rises to her feet and Wynonna follows. </p><p>“Positive. I’m… pregnant.” Wynonna breathes, looking down at her little sister with new tears in her eyes. </p><p>Waverly throws her arms around Wynonna and they hug and cry and laugh. </p><p>It’s scary. More than scary, it’s fucking terrifying. But Wynonna knows she wants it. Even if she has to do it alone. She looks at Waverly again and sees the light and happiness in her eyes and knows she won’t ever be truly alone. </p>
<hr/><p>Within the next week, Wynonna goes to the doctor and finds out she’s five and a half weeks along. She sees the tiny lump that will one day be her baby on the screen. She even hears a very tiny heartbeat. She and Waverly look at the picture they print out for her for so long. </p><p>Jonas calls her for the first time since the other night and when she tells him she’s sure, he hangs up without another word. Wynonna cries herself to sleep. </p><p>The next couple of weeks pass by seemingly slow. Wynonna feels her body changing and reacting to what’s going on inside of it. Every day, Waverly comes home from school with some new knowledge. At night, they sit together and read from a book Wynonna went out and got. She still feels happy, but a little more scared. The scariest part is she still hasn’t told their mom. </p><p>Jonas leaves her messages saying that she’s stupid. That she’s worthless. Then he tells her he loves her. That he’ll take her back if she gets rid of it. They can be happy again. Rinse. Repeat. Wynonna ignores every single one. </p><p>Sometime in the middle of week 8, Wynonna and Waverly are driving home from Waverly’s science fair laughing and talking about possible names. When Wynonna pulls into their driveway, the smile melts right off of her face. </p><p>“Mama..” Waverly mutters, seeing the red sports car parked in the driveway right after Wynonna does. </p><p>Wynonna clenches her jaw, swallows the knot in her throat and prepares for whatever bullshit their mother is coming around for now. Probably to make them pose for pictures and pretend to be a happy family. </p><p><em> We are a happy family, </em> Wynonna thinks, <em> without you. </em></p><p>Waverly walks into the house first as a buffer. She always got treated better than Wynonna did, by their mom anyway. Their father and their oldest sister hadn’t seemed to want much to do with her from what she could remember. </p><p>Michelle Gibson is standing at the kitchen island with a glass of whiskey. Her eyes don’t even raise as her daughters enter the house. </p><p>“Hey mama!” Waverly tries to sound light, but she can feel the darkness of the mood filling the room. </p><p>“Waverly. Go upstairs, angel. I need to talk to your sister.” Michelle speaks evenly and the words curdle Wynonna’s blood. </p><p>Waverly turns to look up at Wynonna with wide scared eyes and opens her mouth to speak. Wynonna presses a finger to her own lips and shakes her head. </p><p>“Go, baby girl. It’ll be okay.” Wynonna says softly, steeling herself against what’s to come. </p><p>Waverly takes a deep breath and listens to Wynonna, going up and shutting the door to her bedroom, but sneaking back to the staircase to sit where she can hear. </p><p>Wynonna moves almost robotically into the kitchen and leans back against the counter across from her mother. </p><p>“Get yourself a drink.” Michelle says, almost coldly. </p><p>Wynonna already feels like she’s going to vomit. It wasn’t uncommon. She’d been drinking casually since she was 16, her mom knew that. Now, though? She hadn’t touched alcohol in weeks. </p><p>“Don’t feel like it.” Wynonna shrugs, busying herself with a piece of paper on the counter. </p><p>“Huh… that’s funny. Any reason?” </p><p>“What’s your deal, huh? Did you come here for a reason? We got the money you sent you didn’t have to –” </p><p>“I’m here because my manager got a call from your little boyfriend.” </p><p>Wynonna feels cold. Waverly has to put her hand over her mouth on the stairs to stop the sound from coming out. </p><p>“He really had some interestin’ news.” Michelle’s smile is wicked as she finally turns around to face Wynonna. </p><p>Wynonna wishes she could just run away. That she could go hide in the bathtub and pretend this wasn’t happening. </p><p>“I–I was gonna tell you…” She manages a few moments later, knowing that she doesn’t have any way to cover up what’s been said. Eventually, there’d be no way to hide it anymore. </p><p>“Tell me what? That you’re gonna do something about your problem? That you already made the appointment?” </p><p>Waverly’s heart picks up from her hiding place on the stairs and she feels like screaming. She feels like telling Michelle she can’t speak to Wynonna like that. Telling her to get out. Out of the house. Out of their lives. But she couldn’t. She could never. </p><p>“I– no. No, I’m not… getting rid of it. There’s no <em> problem </em> . I want to have my baby.” Wynonna gets through the words even if she doesn’t know how. Her eyes are burning with unshed tears and her fists are burning to punch <em> through </em> something. </p><p>Michelle slams her glass down on the counter and makes Wynonna and Waverly jump. </p><p>“You wanna have a baby with that fuckin’ loser?” </p><p>“No. I want to have<em> my </em>baby. I don’t give a shit about him. I don’t need him.” </p><p>“Wynonna… you listen to me, if you think you’re going through with this you’re a goddamn idiot. You’re not fucking up my career more than you already have.” </p><p>“I don’t<em> think </em>, mama. I know. I’ve made up my mind you can’t make me do anything, I’m not a fuckin’ kid. I don’t give a shit about your fragile fucking career. You care more about your music than you’ve ever cared about us.” </p><p>“Oh, I can’t do anything? Who pays for this house? Your car? Everything you two girls do? You couldn’t live like this without me. You couldn’t live <em> at all </em>. You barely finished school. You can’t have a goddamn baby, Wynonna.”</p><p>That sets Wynonna off. If there’s one thing she’s confident about, it’s her ability to care for other people. For Waverly. She’d been doing it for years all on her own. </p><p>“Like you know anything about being a mom! You’ve never been here for us. I take care of myself. I take care of Waverly. I always have. You can say a lot of things about me, but don’t you fucking dare try to say I couldn’t do this. I could take care of this baby, I know I could.” </p><p>“And I’d help! I’d help her. Please. Mama…” Waverly breaks her silence, coming down the stairs and into the kitchen with tears pouring down her cheeks. </p><p>“I thought I told you to go upstairs.” </p><p>“Why should she listen to you, huh? When have you ever done anything for her besides hand her some money and pretend you love her when it looks good for you?” </p><p>Michelle narrows her eyes at Wynonna and moves in closer. “I’m giving you one goddamn week to make that appointment, Wynonna Devin Earp. If you don’t go through with this… you won’t be taking care of anyone. Not Waverly, not even your damn self. I’ll take it all away, cut you off. Is that what you want?” </p><p>Wynonna gapes, tears pooling in her eyes. It feels like her chest is tearing in two. No way would she be able to get a job and have enough money to keep their house, or even get them an apartment in enough time. Not enough to take care of a teenager and a baby on her own. </p><p>Wynonna looks past Michelle to her baby sister. Her whole entire world. She’s standing there sobbing, saying something through her tears but the words don’t reach Wynonna. She can’t lose her. </p><p>Wynonna looks back to her mother and wipes at her eyes, clenching her teeth together hard and wiping her eyes. “Please. Please don’t do this.” Wynonna begs, shaking her head. </p><p>She’s met with nothing but ice in Michelle’s green eyes. If she cares at all, she isn’t showing it. </p><p>“I’ve got somewhere to be. I’m not playing, Wynonna. A <em> week </em>. Have the clinic fax the papers to my manager’s office. Don’t try to fake me out and don’t fuck this up.” Michelle walks towards the door. She spares a glance at Waverly, but it doesn’t linger long. </p><p>“This is so fucked up. You’re not a goddamn mother. You’re fucking evil! How can you be like this? How can you hate your own <em> daughter </em> this fucking much?!” Wynonna screams and cries. Every word is piercing and desperate. The room falls completely silent when Michelle slams the door behind herself as she leaves. </p><p>Wynonna collapses to her knees on the kitchen floor and sobs. She barely registers Waverly coming to kneel beside her, to hold her and comfort her. </p>
<hr/><p>Wynonna cries every single day. Finally on the last possible day, she makes herself make the phone call for the appointment. She spends hours sobbing and throwing up afterwards until she can’t do either one. </p><p>By the time she actually has to go in for the procedure, Wynonna has made herself so solemn and numb that she doesn’t cry or feel much of anything. She knows she can’t. She can’t fuck this up. They have to believe it’s her choice, even if it’s the last thing in the world she wants to do. </p><p>She doesn’t remember much about the procedure itself. The last thing she remembers before the anesthesia kicks in is the bright light above her. Next thing, she’s resting for a while before she’ll be allowed to go home. </p><p>Wynonna sits in the middle of her bed with her knees pulled up against her chest. She wants to drink. Wants to empty every fucking bottle in the house but her body won’t let her. She still feels like it’s there… growing inside even though it’s not. It’s done. Gone. Papers have been sent to her mom to confirm.<br/>
Waverly gets a friend’s parents to bring her home and Wynonna hears her come up the stairs a little after 4PM.  </p><p>“‘Nonna?” Waverly asks tentatively, quietly. </p><p>The sight of her sister is painful. Wearing a big hoodie and sweatpants that seem to swallow her, she looks hollow. Wynonna’s eyes are empty when she looks up at her. </p><p>“Hm? What do you need, baby girl?” Wynonna says softly, swallowing as if the words choke her. </p><p>Waverly shakes her head, moving into the room a little more. “What do <em> you </em> need?” </p><p>Wynonna doesn’t have an answer and Waverly doesn’t press for one. She pushes off her shoes and climbs onto the bed, forcing herself underneath Wynonna’s arm and snuggling against her. </p><p>“I can take care of you sometimes, too. You know?” Waverly whispers. </p><p>Wynonna still doesn’t answer, but she shifts enough to make the way they lay more comfortable. </p><p>“I’m here, ‘Nonna. Always.” Waverly promises, her voice breaking just a little. “I’m sorry.” She chokes out, biting her lip and shaking her head. “I’m sorry I said it would be okay when it’s not. You –– you’re a good mom to me. You’re the best mom.” She breaks, and so does Wynonna. </p><p>Tears come flowing out without hesitation. They cry and hold one another for hours, until they both get pulled under by complete exhaustion. </p><p>Hours later, Waverly stirs and sits up, rubbing her eyes. It’s completely dark in Wynonna’s room and she looks down to find her sister still asleep. Somehow, she still doesn’t look peaceful. Waverly watches her for a minute or two before she crawls out of the bed. </p><p>She grabs Wynonna’s favorite blanket from the end of the bed and spreads it over her before going downstairs to make them dinner. When she finishes and comes back to wake Wynonna, the older girl just looks up at her and shakes her head. </p><p>“Are you too tired? Just wanna sleep more?” </p><p>“No, don’t feel tired anymore. I’m just not hungry. Sorry, Waves.” Wynonna mutters, her voice soft and sad. </p><p>“That’s okay. I’ll save it. I’m – I’m gonna go do my homework, but I’ll come back. If- If you want?” Waverly tells her gently. Wynonna barely nods before laying back down with her back to Waverly. </p>
<hr/><p>Wynonna isn’t herself for weeks. Waverly can’t remember the last time she heard her laugh or saw her smile. She’s barely done more than sleep and hardly eats. Waverly can see how small she’s getting, can feel it when they sleep. </p><p>Waverly has slept next to her sister every night since that day. It comforts her just as much as it does Wynonna. </p><p>One afternoon, Wynonna falls asleep on the couch while they’re watching a movie and Waverly starts reading a book until she hears someone knocking. </p><p>She can’t think of who it could be and when she opens it, it’s the last person she’d been expecting. Her blood boils immediately and her fist clenches on the doorknob. </p><p>“Go away, Jonas.” Waverly tries to shut the door in his face but he’s much bigger and stronger and he stops it. </p><p>“Wait! I wanted to see her.” He says with a smile. In his other hand are some flowers that look like they’re wilting. </p><p>Waverly’s stomach churns. “She’s asleep. She doesn’t want to see you. Leave.” </p><p>“I told her that if she did it we’d get back together. So, I’m here to take her back.” He grins, and it makes Waverly want to punch him in the face. </p><p>If she hadn’t seen the bruises he’d put on her sister, she’d probably try it. </p><p>“Are you insane? What’s wrong with you? Wynonna doesn’t want to be with you. Go. Before I call the cops. And I’ll tell them what you did before.” Waverly tries to keep her voice even, but it shakes. </p><p>Jonas clenches his jaw and for a second, Waverly is scared. He could overpower her, make his way inside. She couldn’t stop him. What’s a fourteen year old going to do to a grown man? </p><p>He doesn’t try it, though. He just drops the flowers on the doorstep and turns around and leaves. Waverly leaves the flowers where they lay and locks the door behind herself.</p><p> It takes her a minute to catch her breath after the encounter, but when she goes back to Wynonna she’s sleeping so peacefully it makes Waverly start to cry. </p><p>“Waves?” She wakes, her voice cracking softly. </p><p>“No, Shhh, just go back to sleep.” Waverly smiles at her and nods, sitting down on the couch next to where Wynonna’s head is laying. </p><p>Wynonna listens, laying back down in Waverly’s lap instead. Waverly takes a deep breath, cries quietly for wynonna. For herself. For the baby they’ll never meet. When the tears subside, Waverly braids her big sister’s hair while she sleeps. </p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>November 2017</em>
</p><p>Nicole hears strumming before she sees Wynonna. It’s not as distant as it usually is, so she knows Wynonna isn’t on the roof like she’s found her so many times before. She’s probably just sitting outside. Nicole follows the sound until she spots Wynonna sitting with her old acoustic guitar. </p><p>Wynonna’s strumming a rhythm Nicole can’t place and is far too into it to even notice that Nicole’s listening. She doesn’t think she’s ever heard it before… Maybe, it’s a unique take on a cover or maybe… Maybe, it’s an original song. She keeps her distance and listens. </p><p><em> I wanna start this out and say </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I gotta get it off my chest </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Got no anger, got no malice </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Just a little bit of regret </em></p><p>The first thing Nicole notices is how rugged Wynonna’s voice sounds, how raw and pure the emotion is in each syllable. This is definitely an original song… And it’s definitely personal. Nicole feels a prickling sensation as she listens. </p><p><em> Know nobody else will tell you </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> So there's some things I gotta say </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Gonna jot it down and then get it out </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And then I'll be on my way </em></p><p><em> No, you're not half the man you think that you are </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And you can't fill the hole inside of you with money, drugs and cars </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I'm so glad I never ever had a baby with you </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> 'Cause you can't love nothin' unless there's somethin' in it for you </em></p><p>Nicole takes in every word carefully. What does Wynonna mean when she sings about never having a baby with this man? Had she been that serious with someone before? They had been considering children? How come Nicole doesn’t know about him? </p><p>The thought comes and goes. Wynonna doesn’t share a lot of personal stuff and they hadn’t even known each other for a year yet. As much as Nicole longs to know Wynonna inside out, she tries to let the woman come to her in her own time. </p><p>The next part must be the chorus. Nicole continues to listen closely.</p><p><em> Oh, I feel so sorry </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I feel so sad </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I tried to help you </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> It just made you mad </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And I had no warnin' </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> About who you are </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I'm just glad I made it out without breakin' down </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And then ran so fuckin' far </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> That you would never ever touch me again </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Won't see your alligator tears </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> 'Cause, no, I've had enough of them </em></p><p>Nicole’s blood runs boiling hot beneath her skin. Her blood is molten, she swears. Her face almost matches the color of her hair with the anger she feels rising at the thought of someone laying their hands on Wynonna in a way that could ever make her feel like <em> this.  </em></p><p><em> Let me start this off by sayin' </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I really meant well from the start </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Take a broken man right in my hands </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And then put back all his parts </em></p><p>Wynonna starts to cry, causing her voice to break gently on certain words. Nicole feels the tightening of her own throat and she hates that she can’t make herself speak. She hates that she can’t turn away and stop listening to his incredibly personal moment. She hates herself for listening and doing nothing. But, she can see Wynonna needs this--Needs to finish. </p><p><em> But you're not half the man you think that you are </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And you can't fill the hole inside of you with money, girls and cars </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I'm so glad I never ever had a baby with you </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> 'Cause you can't love nothin' unless there's somethin' in it for you </em></p><p><em> Oh, I feel so sorry </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I feel so sad </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I tried to help you </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> It just made you mad </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And I had no warnin' (I had no warnin') </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> About who you are ('bout who you) </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Just glad I made it out without breakin' down </em></p><p><em> Oh, I feel so sorry </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I feel so sad </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I tried to help you </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> It just made you mad </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And I had no warnin' </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> About who you are </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> 'Bout who you are </em></p><p><em> Hey </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Hey </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Hey </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> Hey </em></p><p><em> 'Cause you're not half the man you think that you are </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> And you can't fill the hole inside of you with money, drugs and cars </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> I'm so glad I never ever had a baby with you </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> 'Cause you can't love nothin' unless there's somethin' in it for you </em></p><p><em> I feel so sad </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> You should be sad </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> You should be </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> You should be sad </em></p><p><em> You should be </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> You should be </em> <em><br/>
</em> <em> You should be </em></p><p>Nicole waits for the last chord to fade out before walking up to Wynonna. The anger and hurt takes control of her before she can stop herself. “Who is that about? I’ll fucking destroy him,” Nicole spits venomously. </p><p>Wynonna’s head snaps to the redhead and she jumps. “Haught, what the fuck?” Wynonna asks, but there’s no fight in her voice. She’s tired. </p><p>“Who is it about? Wynonna, I just-- Fuck, I feel like I need to punch him in the face!” Nicole punctuates her point by smashing her fist into her other palm and cracking the knuckles on her fist. </p><p>“Nic… It was… a long time ago. I just-- I just have to--” Wynonna sighs and leans the guitar carefully against the wall behind the chair she’s sitting in. Her palms are sweaty, both from holding the neck of the guitar and from all of the terrible emotions she’d just worked through. “Sometimes, I just have to play that song and process all that shit again. It was-- I don’t want to talk about it.” </p><p>Wynonna’s softness… her exhaustion… Finally, it cuts through Nicole’s anger and douses the burning flames within her. She sags and sighs as she watches Wynonna rub her palms on her jeans over and over again. Her heart and brain shift and she falls to her knees in front of Wynonna and takes both of her hands in hers. </p><p>“I’m sweaty,” Wynonna offers weakly. </p><p>“I don’t care,” Nicole assures. She holds Wynonna’s hands in hers. The backs of Wynonna’s hands rest in her palms. She runs her thumbs over the middle of each sweaty palm, just firmly enough to be soothing. </p><p>Wynonna watches their hands closely. She can still feel her palms tingling, she can feel the way that the pads of Nicole’s thumbs move with resistance against her disgusting, rough, drummer palms. </p><p><em> Pull away! Pull away! </em>Her mind screams at her.</p><p><em> No, </em> her heart answers. <em> It’s helping. Let her.  </em></p><p>In her vulnerable state, Wynonna listens to her heart. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Nicole speaks softly again. </p><p>“For what?” Wynonna asks genuinely. </p><p>“For being angry… For trying-- For making it about me. I’m sorry, I just-- The thought of someone hurting you- I hate it,” Nicole explains. “But, I’m here… whatever <em> you </em>need, ‘Nonna, I’m here.” </p><p>Still, those blue eyes remain trained on the strong thumbs massaging her palms. Neither one of them could tell you how long they remain silent after Nicole assures her. Wynonna watches Nicole’s thumbs and Nicole never stops. She doesn’t speak again. She doesn’t press. She lets their sacred, comfortable silence soothe them both. </p><p>Eventually, Wynonna closes her hands and holds onto each thumb. Slowly, both of them move until their fingers are laced together. Wynonna squeezes and Nicole squeezes back. </p><p>“Nic?” </p><p>“Hmm?” </p><p>Wynonna finally raises her head and finds her favorite brown eyes staring back at her. Already, Nicole is her second favorite person in the world, second to Waverly alone. “Will you play me something? Anything?”</p><p>“Yeah, of course. Got a mood or a genre you wanna hear?”</p><p>“No. Just you. Play whatever comes to mind.” </p><p>Nicole picks up Wynonna’s guitar and moves  to sit close to Wynonna. She plays one song. Then, another. She plays until Wynonna’s lips start to curve into a soft smile. Nicole offers to make her dinner and Wynonna’s stomach answers for her with a growl. </p><p><em> I’ll tell you one day, Haughtstuff, </em> Wynonna thinks. <em> If you’re still around. </em></p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>February 12, 2018 </em>
</p><p>Wynonna won’t pick up her phone. Seeing the date is too hard today. She still knows, but, <em> seeing it… </em>it’s too much. The buzzing barely reaches her ears. She ignores it. If it’s Alex, she will call again, immediately after. Her ex-girlfriend has finally started to talk to her regularly again, but Wynonna knows she would call today even if they didn’t. </p><p>The phone doesn’t buzz again, so Wynonna knows it isn’t Alex. Alex knows what she has to do today. Alex is the only one who knows besides Waverly and… </p><p>His name makes Wynonna feel sick to this day. She wonders if that will ever heal, if that blow will ever soften. She prays to forget that this man even exists out there, but she knows that as long as she lives, he will haunt her. </p><p>It has to be around noon, Wynonna guesses, but she has no idea truly. It’s bright outside. The sun is beating bright and seems to be high in the sky… Not that she actually knows how to tell time by the sun’s position in the sky. Maybe it’s eight in the morning. </p><p>The house is quiet. Waverly doesn’t seem to be moving about. Maybe, it really is early in the morning. Or maybe Waves is still lying in bed... just like Wynonna. Maybe, her little sister is crying, too… Just like Wynonna. </p><p>“Wynonna? Waves?” a voice calls in the distance. </p><p>
  <em> Nicole.  </em>
</p><p>“Hey, I let myself in with the spare! ‘Nonna! Where are you?” </p><p>Wynonna doesn’t answer. She wants to. Tears choke her when she opens her mouth to reply and she can’t make a sound. Her eyes screw shut and she feels hot tears stream down her temples, and run into her ears. She brings her hands up and tries to get all of the wet out of them. <em> Fucking annoying, stupid tears. Stupid.  </em></p><p>“Wyn?” Nicole speaks so gently. “Are you okay?” </p><p>Wynonna sniffles and wipes her snot on the back of her hand. “No, Haught, I’m not okay.” </p><p>Nicole sits on the edge of the bed and watches as tears continue to stream down the sides of Wynonna’s face. Wynonna won’t look at her, just keeps staring up at her ceiling. “Can I help?” </p><p>Still no answer from Wynonna. The drummer’s hand extends and reaches for the woman at the end of her bed. Nicole takes it without a moment’s hesitation. The next instant, she’s pulled down. Nicole toes her shoes off and crawls the rest of the way up the bed. She waits. </p><p>Wynonna still won’t look at her. She just pushes at Nicole until she’s lying back and buries herself against Nicole’s chest. Nicole’s arms hold her close, but gently. The silence remains for some time until Wynonna finally breaks it. Her voice is so small. Nicole thinks she’s never heard her sound so breakable. </p><p>“Remember that song? The one I was playing that made you angry?” </p><p>“Yeah…”</p><p>“It’s about… my ex. He wasn’t--” Wynonna stops and swallows the knot in her throat. “He wasn’t a good person, but we were together… on and off for a while. I, um, I ended up pregnant.” </p><p>Nicole runs her fingers through Wynonna’s hair slowly, but stays quiet. Wynonna’s letting her in and she wants to be there to comfort her every step of the way. </p><p>“I wanted to keep it,” Wynonna admits. “I wanted it more than I’ve ever wanted anything. I wanted my baby… My baby that I could love and have and raise and that baby would love me because… because it was mine and because I would love it with everything I have. I wanted my baby so bad.” </p><p>Wynonna has to stop talking towards the last few words because her voice started to give out, breaking and disappearing. She sniffles hard and burrows herself as far into Nicole as she possibly can. More than anything in the world, she wishes she could just dissolve into Nicole and find the peace that the taller woman radiates completely. But, she can’t. She has to settle for this. </p><p>“I-- My m-mom found out because my asshole ex called her manager. She made-- she--” Again, her voice fails her. </p><p>Nicole tightens her arm around Wynonna’s body and continues to run her fingers through her hair. “It’s okay, ‘Nonna. You don’t have to. You don’t have to… I’m here. You don’t have to say anything.” </p><p>Wynonna knows that’s true. Nicole would never force her to talk, but she <em> wants </em>to. For the first time in so long, Wynonna wants to talk about this and share herself with Nicole, because Nicole will keep her safe. She knows it. </p><p>“I know, Nic. I want-- I want you to know. I want-- you to be able to-- I just--” She blows a hard breath out through her mouth. “My mom made me… go to a clinic and-- I didn’t get to have my baby. I k-killed it.” </p><p>“Wynonna…” </p><p>“No, I did. But, I h-had to, because I would have lost Waverly. My mom paid for everything then… I was struggling to-- Get a job and keep up with my music. I could have never--” Wynonna finally turns to lift her head and look up at Nicole. </p><p>It becomes clear that Wynonna’s been lying here, crying for much longer than Nicole could have guessed. Probably all day. Nicole tilts her head and looks at her with all of the love she’s ever felt in her life. The hand that had been going through Wynonna’s hair moves to wipe those tears from her face. It rests at Wynonna’s cheek, holding her. </p><p>“I could have never taken care of a teenager and a baby… I would have lost Waverly, and I can’t-- I could never lose Waverly. I could never let her be left to my fucking useless mother.” Poison returns to Wynonna’s voice as she thinks about that vile woman. </p><p>Wynonna leans into Nicole’s touch and sighs. “I t-told you all of this because… Today… it’s been four years… Since I... lost my baby. They wouldn’t have been four yet, obviously. But… They would be able to talk to me… They’d have their little personality… Probably a little shit because of who their mom is… Hopefully not as big of a dick as their sperm donor… I think about it all the time.” Wynonna smiles sadly as the images flash through her mind. </p><p>“You would be… the greatest mom, ‘Nonna,” Nicole says with a sad smile of her own. </p><p>“Yeah, well… I think that was my sign. No kids for me. I had my kid with Waves… I did an okay job with her. She’s enough for me. She’s more than enough for me. No matter what… I did good with her. I should stop while I’m ahead…”</p><p>Nicole’s heart breaks into a million pieces all at once. <em> I love you so much, Wynonna. I’d have a family with you. I’d raise a kid with you. I’d give you everything you ever wanted. Please Wynonna, just ask me. Just ask me. Tell me you want it, I’ll give it to you. </em></p><p>“Haught?” Wynonna breaks through her inner monologue.</p><p>“Yeah, ‘Nonna?” </p><p>“What’re you thinkin’?” </p><p>Nicole considers it. But now isn’t the time. Today should be about Wynonna. “I just think that… You’re really strong and I admire you… And I’m proud of you. And I think that every year… we’ll spend this day doing whatever you want, but I’m gonna be there. Every time. If you want me to.”</p><p>Wynonna lets her chin rest on top of her own hand on Nicole’s chest. “I might just do this all day… You sure you wanna waste a day like that?” </p><p>“Whatever you want. If you want me there, I’ll be there.”</p><p>Wynonna considers for only one moment. “I want you here. It feels… better now… That you know. I want you here.”</p><p>“Then, I’ll always be here.”</p><p>“Always is a long time. You sure?” </p><p>“You’re stuck with me, Earp.” </p><p>“Promise me.” </p><p>“I promise.” </p>
<hr/><p>
  <em> February 12, 2020  </em>
</p><p>For the last two years, they’ve had a little ritual for this day. It’s unspoken and Wynonna never asked for it, but she seems happy and content through it. Nicole spends the night at Wynonna’s so that she can wake up next to her. Waverly makes them all Wynonna’s favorite breakfast. They go to Devil’s Music and kill a few hours there. Then, they go eat wherever Wynonna wants.</p><p>Last year, Waverly went with them, but this year tells them about her plans during breakfast. </p><p>“I think I wanna go work. With – with the Valentine’s show coming up and the album, I almost have this song finished, I think I can do it.” </p><p>Wynonna reaches across the table and lays a hand on Waverly’s, stopping her stream of consciousness. </p><p>“Waves… you don’t have to explain. Today’s –– you can do what you need to do to feel better on this day, too. Okay? You’re not –– hurting my feelings.” Wynonna assures her. </p><p>Waverly visibly soothes, her shoulders sagging. Her eyes drift closed and she takes a breath, nodding gently. Nicole just watches them with love in her eyes. Watching Wynonna love and care for Waverly has always softened her. </p><p>Today, it makes her heart break a little more than usual. It’s a reminder of how good a mother Wynonna could’ve been. Nicole fights the urge to tear up. <em> One day </em> , she thinks, <em> Please let this woman have a family one day. I’d give it to her if she wanted. I’d give her anything.  </em></p><p>Wynonna look for very long in the record store. They find a few records they each want to add to their collections and as a joke, they always check the ‘L’ bin for <em> Layla </em>. They don’t find it and Nicole pays for their things before they go. </p><p>“She doesn’t come easy, does she?” Wynonna jokes when they’re walking out.</p><p> Nicole drapes an arm across her shoulders, pulling her against her side with a big smile. “No, she doesn’t. That’s for sure.” </p><p>“We got lucky that day, huh?” Wynonna smiles at the ground, raising her hand to intertwine their fingers. She looks up at Haught as they walk and she can’t believe this year will be three years. Three years since the first time they walked out of that shop side by side.</p><p>Haught looks beautiful behind her sunglasses, hair behind her ears, nodding and grinning with those perfect teeth and that strong jaw. </p><p>“I think so. I feel pretty lucky. Not because of the record, either, eh?” Nicole says softly, glancing down at her best friend. </p><p>Wynonna lifts her eyebrows even though she knows what Nicole is going to say. She wants to hear it, needs to. </p><p>“I feel lucky because I got you.” Nicole says it so surely, leaning in and kissing the side of Wynonna’s head. </p><p>It fills her aching chest with warmth. It makes her feel –– special, and real and alive. On a day when those things are hard to want or be. </p><p>“I feel lucky that I got you, too, Red. Without a doubt. I couldn’t do this without you.” </p><p>“Sure you could. But you never have to. Never, okay?” Nicole promises. </p><p>Somehow, even though it’s a big promise, Wynonna believes it. </p><p>She thinks back to the night they shared last year when they sat on the roof of Wynonna’s house. They passed a joint back and forth before Wynonna finally got up the courage to ask Nicole if she’d ever <em> shotgunned </em> before. </p><p>
  <em>“Nuh-uh” The redhead told her, shaking her head. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Wynonna took a long drag and grabbed Nicole’s jaw in her hand. She leaned in so close their lips were almost touching and Nicole felt like her heart was going to leap through her chest and off the roof. Wynonna blew the smoke into Nicole’s waiting mouth and when she pulled back, all she could see was Nicole’s dazed, slack-jawed expression. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Don’t waste it.” Wynonna laughed, pressing Nicole’s mouth closed gently with her finger. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Nicole abode, but she couldn't stop staring at Wynonna. Her hair was up in a bun and she was in a big hoodie. The sleeves were rolled up because they’re too long. She looked so small and perfect. Her glasses sat on that perfect nose and Nicole could’ve kissed her. She wished she’d kissed her. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Wynonna leaned her head against Nicole’s shoulder and the taller woman softened, letting her head rest against Wynonna’s. They were sitting on top of a big blanket in silence and Nicole worked up the courage to take Wynonna’s hand. She thanked the weed or whatever else made her do it, because Wynonna squeezed her hand lightly and didn’t let go. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I’ll always be here for you, Wynonna. Always.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Always? Forever?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“Always and forever.” Nicole promised, the way she always would if Wynonna asked those questions. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>“I love you, Haught.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em>It went right to Nicole’s chest the same, no matter how many times Wynonna said it.</em><br/>
<br/>
<em>“I love you, too, ‘Nonna.” </em>
</p><p>Wynonna shakes away the memory and pulls herself back into the moment with Nicole. “Where’d you go?” Nicole asks softly, concern dripping from her voice. </p><p>Wynonna just smiles at her and it melts the concern away like butter. “Somewhere good, Haught. Don’t worry. I know. Always? Forever?” </p><p>Nicole grins and gives Wynonna a soft nod. “Always and forever. Now tell me, where’s my girl wanna eat?” Nicole breathes. Wynonna doesn’t mention the way those words make her tingle. </p>
<hr/><p>While they’re waiting for their food, Wynonna’s phone buzzes in her jacket pocket. She fishes it out and looks at the screen, already knowing. A soft smile tugs at her lips and she answers it without getting up from the table. </p><p>“Hey, loser, ‘sup?” Wynonna jokes, her voice remaining soft. </p><p><em> “Don’t ‘sup me, ‘Nonna.” </em> Alex says with a laugh Nicole can hear through the phone. </p><p>This is the one time she doesn't feel jealous, not even a little. It warms her that Wynonna has this. Has someone who cares about her the way Alex does. Every single year Alex calls, even if it’s just for a second. </p><p>
  <em> “I just wanted to say I love you and I’m proud of you. How’s uh – is Haught treating you good this year?”  </em>
</p><p>Wynonna blushes, ducking her head. She looks up at Nicole through her lashes and smiles, her dimples deepening. Alex would make so much fun if she could see. </p><p>“Yeah, my Haughty always does. I love you, too. Thank you, ‘Lex. I’ll see you soon okay?” </p><p>
  <em> “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”  </em>
</p><p>“I never do.”</p><p><em> “Bye, Wynonna.” </em>  </p><p>“Bye… loser.” Wynonna smiles, hanging up the phone and putting it back into her pocket. </p><p>“Now, back to that conversation about <em> The Last Jedi </em>…” Wynonna leans forward, blowing her straw wrapper at Nicole.</p><p>It makes the redhead roll her eyes and swoon at the same time. A crazy blush creeps into her cheeks and she can’t stop smiling. </p>
<hr/><p>Waverly feels like she’s been trying to get these words down for fucking years. They just won’t come. Every time she tries, she can’t stop thinking and when she thinks about –– all she can think about today she doesn’t stop crying. </p><p>Maybe it’s being alone, or maybe it’s just the stress of everything else, but it’s hitting her hard this year. Her face is buried in her hands when she hears the door to the studio space open. </p><p>Waverly turns quickly to see who came in and the sight stops her heart in her chest. </p><p>“Waves… I saw your Jeep out when I passed by, grabbed you some dinner so I hope you’re hungry.” Rosita is standing there with a bag of takeout in her hand and a wide, beautiful smile. </p><p>The smile falters and her eyebrows twitch when she notices Waverly’s red eyes and trembling lip. “Oh, Waverly… what’s wrong?” Rosita asks, already moving closer. </p><p>Waverly shakes her head and breaks down. Rosita sits the take out on the table and moves onto the couch next to the younger woman, taking in her arms without much of a thought. </p><p>Waverly feels safety and warmth and when she breathes in Rosita’s smell, she almost cries harder. It all comes over her at once and she can’t stop. </p><p>Rosita takes all the time Waverly needs, holding and soothing, brushing her hand against her hair. She’d be lying if she said her heart wasn’t racing and aching for the pianist or that holding Waverly didn’t feel absolutely perfect. </p><p>Eventually, the musician lifts her head from Rosita’s shoulder and wipes her eyes. “God, Rosie, I’m sorry. I–I got makeup on your shirt.” </p><p>“It’s an old shirt.” Rosita says with a soft smile, shaking her head. “Why are you crying? Did something happen?” </p><p>Waverly wipes her nose and shakes her head, then nods. “Well… yes. But it was a long time ago. It’s just – I just…” </p><p>“Breathe. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” </p><p>“I-I do.” </p><p>“Okay.” Rosita assures, a gentle hand on Waverly’s arm as she takes the time to compose herself. </p><p>Waverly tells Rosita the story. Tells her without saying too much or going way too far. By the end, Rosita has tears in her eyes, too. </p><p>“Waverly… I’m – I’m so sorry. For both of you.” </p><p>“Don’t say anything about it, please…” </p><p>“Of course. Of course I won’t. I swear.” Rosita nods. </p><p>They spend a few more moments talking and Rosita helps Waverly calm down and stop crying completely. Before long, she’s even got her laughing. </p><p>They eat the dinner Rosita brought and get lost talking about their favorite programs on HGTV and their first memories with music until Waverly’s phone buzzes. </p><p><b>Wynonna:</b> <em>Haught and I just got home. You okay, baby girl?</em> </p><p>“Oh, shoot!” Waverly checks the time. Almost ten. God, she must have been talking to Rosita forever. </p><p>“Everything okay? Do you need to leave?” Rosita asks attentively. </p><p>Waverly considers it for a moment before shaking her head and typing out a message to Wynonna. </p><p><b>Waverly:</b> <em>I’m good, ‘Nonna. I’ll be home later, still working on the song. I love you &lt;3 </em></p><p><b>Wynonna:</b> <em>I love you, too &lt;3 </em></p><p>“Nicole’s at home with her.” Waverly explains. </p><p>It makes Rosita lift an eyebrow, but smile as she nods. </p><p>“Those two…” </p><p>“Are the only ones who seem to not see it.” Waverly finishes. </p><p>“You read my mind.” Rosita laughs, making Waverly smile so big her eyes disappear. </p><p>“Thank you… for all of this. For showing up. God, you really pulled me out of this. I – I think I can get back to the song. I had so much trouble before you got here.” </p><p>If Waverly isn’t mistaken, she swears she sees Rosita start to blush. “You don’t have to thank me,  Waves. I’m happy to help. Wait, does that mean…” </p><p>“You want to hear the words?” Waverly says excitedly. </p><p>“You know I do.” </p><p>Waverly gets up and moves to her piano and Rosita follows, sitting on the nearby stool to be closer as she watches Waverly. </p><p>On the table, Waverly’s phone lights up with two unread messages.<br/>
<br/>
</p><p><b>Wynonna:</b> <em>oh, and Waves… I’m doing YSBS for the v-day show.</em></p><p><b>Mama: </b> <em>   I’ll see you at your show on friday. Congrats on the deal.   </em><br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. i will run to you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The Valentine's Day show. An unexpected guest (for some). A surprise guest. Wynonna takes people home.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here's a link to the playlist: <a href="https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA">https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fD3tXGM9RhwtijyjCAxWv?si=-HJkB7E0RUuEs6WLjqUTDA</a>. Have fun figuring out which songs have emotional significance and which ones are merely covered/mentioned.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Wynonna’s head rolls from side to side as she checks herself in the mirror. She feels more powerful than she ever has. So much of her life just feels </span>
  <em>
    <span>right. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly is strong and independent. She is smart, brilliant, and talented. Wynonna takes pride in the fact that she plays the biggest part in helping Waverly blossom into the woman she was always meant to be. She raised her and nurtured her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She has real friends… Not ones who trash her behind her back or one who used her because they thought being friends with the kid of a famous woman would get them somewhere. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She has Nicole. Wynonna hasn’t ever had anyone like Nicole before. Lex has been around longer, sure, but there were moments Wynonna knew that they didn’t fit. There hasn’t been a single moment since meeting Nicole Haught that Wynonna ever thought to herself, </span>
  <em>
    <span>She doesn’t understand. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Even when Nicole and Wynonna don’t see eye-to-eye, Nicole always understands where Wynonna comes from. She will walk around to her side and she will view it from Wynonna’s perspective. She may not see it exactly the way that Wynonna does, but she will look nonetheless. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Because of that, Wynonna has started to try and do the same for not only her, but Waverly… Lex… Everyone. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Jesus Christ, Wynonna!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The younger Earp woman’s voice makes Wynonna smirk. She looks at herself in the mirror. Her “outfit” is a simple black bra underneath a Victoria’s Secret bondage teddy, leather pants, and eventually she’ll put on the red blazer hanging up on her closet door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah… I look pretty good, huh?” Wynonna teases, turning to look at her sister. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s eyebrows raise as she sees the full look from the front. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Should we tweet out a mirror selfie and give the world some Earp Sister goodness?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh absolutely not. Not with you looking like that. I still feel like your dorky kid sister most of the time. The last thing I need is to see the flood of comments about how sexy you are and how cute and adorable I am.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna chuckles. “Fine. I can let the look be a surprise.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, I’m going to go try and get hotter. Geeze!” </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna sips water, leaning over the island in their kitchen and scrolling on her phone. People are excited about the show. People are spending their freaking Valentine’s Day at a show for </span>
  <em>
    <span>their </span>
  </em>
  <span>band. Despite being surrounded by this shit growing up, Wynonna doesn’t think that this fact will ever settle. Their band that they built. Without any fucking help from Michelle God Forsaken Gibson. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Going through the </span>
  <em>
    <span>#ChasingSkylarks </span>
  </em>
  <span>hashtag always makes Wynonna grin. It’s flooded with photographs of the four of them--all combinations of them. Shae and Wynonna look badass and always piss around with each other. Waverly and Nicole usually look cute and soft together. The photos of Shae, Waverly, and Nicole make her smile the most. Shae and Nicole are so attentive to Waverly. They take care of her just like Wynonna does. It’s special.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then, there’s the photographs of Wynonna and Nicole. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Wynhaught. Red Wyn is so much sexier. These people… </span>
  </em>
  <span>Wynonna huffs out a breath through her nose. She gets it. There’s an obsession with Haught’s name. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Wynhaught. Wayhaught. Shaehaught. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Wynonna </span>
  <em>
    <span>gets it. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna chews on her bottom lip as she taps onto the </span>
  <em>
    <span>#WynHaught </span>
  </em>
  <span>hashtag. She scrolls through photo after photo of her with Nicole. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>@wynswaves</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>they’re so in love!!!! </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>@myhaughtguitarist</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>wynhaught content tonight! wynhaught content tonight!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>@lilyb</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>i hope wynhaught duet something tonight. i am begging from my soul. @danidmusic, manifest with me!!!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>@wildnonna</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>wynhaught kiss when! WYNHAUGHT KISS WHEN!!!!! </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The sound of items clattering in Wynonna’s peripheral makes the drummer flinch and drop her phone onto the counter (thank god, she’d been leaning so it hits the counter with a dull thud). Wynonna turns her head immediately to find the sound and sees Nicole standing there with her mouth hanging open. Nicole’s phone and water bottle lie on the floor and Wynonna rolls her lips in between her teeth to stifle her laugh. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna stands to her full height and turns towards Nicole. She places her hands on her hips and quirks here eyebrow. “You good, Haughty?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Haughty doesn’t answer. Brown eyes rake over her shamelessly and it’s not like Wynonna could blame her even if she wanted to. This outfit is doing exactly what it is intended to. The one other thing Wynonna has going for her besides music is her sex appeal. It’s been that way since high school. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna waves her hand. “Earth to Haught. C’mon, Nic. You’ve seen me in less…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The memory plays in her mind like it was yesterday. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Wynonna had only known Nicole Haught for about three months when Nicole finally noticed Wynonna had two piercings beneath her clothing. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“So, did that hurt?” Nicole asked before she turned her head back to her drink, doing her damnedest not to stare at Wynonna’s tits. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Did what hurt?” Wynonna asked her without a clue. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Your piercings. On your nipples.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Wynonna grinned. The way Nicole’s face flushed red and her normally attentive eyes wouldn’t look at her made Wynonna feel warm all over.  “Not really. Healing was a little bit of a bitch and took way too damn long, but totally worth it.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh, cool. That’s pretty hardcore,” Nicole told her before taking a sip from her bottle. They were eating dinner in her kitchen after hanging out all day. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Have you never seen pierced nipples, Haught? You don’t have to search for the answer to the universe’s secrets in that bottle. You can look if you want.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole raised her head finally, but those eyes settled on Wynonna’s face. Damn, she looked smug. “I wasn’t trying to be rude or anything,” Nicole offered. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re not rude. Do you wanna see ‘em?” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole’s eyes grew wide, bulged so much she feared they might have rolled right out of the sockets. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Wynonna shook her head. “You loser. I’m not shy. You don’t have to be. Do you wanna see ‘em?” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Y-yeah, I guess. I mean I’ve never, like, seen any up close or anything.” What kind of message would it send if she had said no? She didn’t want to be weird. They were friends and it wouldn’t be weird. It was for science. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Wynonna grinned and stood, stepping right next to Nicole and lifting the flimsy crop top she had been wearing. All of her tattoos on her torso could be seen unobstructed along with the two tiny pieces of metal that went through her nipples. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole licked her lips and stared. God, did she stare. And, god, did she want to fucking feel the metal roll around on her tongue and-- </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“So?” Wynonna asked. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>It took Nicole several seconds to shake her mind free of those thoughts. “Looks badass. Shouldn’t have been surprised you had ‘em.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“You sayin’ I’m predictable, Haughtpants?” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Never.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Back to now, Nicole’s face is the same. It looks just like it had when Wynonna had flashed her bare chest to Nicole that day years ago. Wynonna can’t believe she still looks at her like that. Nicole’s mouth moves like she wants to say something, but no words or sounds come out at first. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna waits patiently, looking more smug and feeling more powerful by the second. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Finally, Nicole breathes, “This look is.... Wow..." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Warmth spreads throughout Wynonna’s body and she shivers in spite of it. "What is it? All the straps? Shoulda known... Naughty Haughty." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The expression that comes across Nicole’s face is the perfect mix of sexy and adorable. The taller woman would almost look dumb if she wasn’t so breathtaking. Wynonna realizes this at the exact moment her body reminds her to suck in a sharp breath through her nose. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Who-who's coming to the show tonight?" Nicole inquires, scratching at the back of her head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Confused, Wynonna raises one eyebrow. "I don't have a fuckin' clue, Haught. What do you mean?" </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole tilts her head and raises her eyebrows, nodding down towards Wynonna’s look.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span> "Oh, you asshole, you think I'm dressing up for someone?" </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Well..."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A tangible shift occurs in the space between them as Wynonna starts to walk closer to Nicole. Something within Wynonna’s been shifting, settling, and turning for years. Little by little. As much as she fights it, it remains. She feels an indescribable ache to just </span>
  <em>
    <span>admit defeat. </span>
  </em>
  <span>So, she lets herself tease. She allows herself this happiness. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Maybe, I am..." Wynonna starts, shrugging. "Maybe she's already seen it..." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole stops breathing for an instant. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Does she mean…? She couldn’t. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole swallows and clears her throat. "What'd she say?" </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Not much... Dropped a few things..." Wynonna bends down carefully to pick Nicole’s items up and hand them back.  "Drooled a little bit." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit, she means me. She’s fucking teasing me. Wynonna, please… Please, don’t play with me. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole's chest heaves with her deep breaths and she forces herself to laugh to save herself from the impending doom she feels deep in her heart. "Fuck off..." she breathes with a chuckle, retrieving her items from Wynonna. "I didn't drool." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna lifts her head up to look more closely at Nicole before bringing her thumb up to wipe at the corner of Nicole's mouth. "Hmm... Sure... Don't tell me what this is then." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once again, Nicole is slack-jawed, staring down at her best friend. Wynonna merely chuckles and steps back, pulling away before she lets herself do something she’ll really regret… </span>
  <em>
    <span>Probably. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She turns her back to Nicole to get her own bearings back and speaks. "Seriously, Haught, you've seen my tits. Get it together, you useless lesbian."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>So many tattoos can be seen through this… </span>
  <em>
    <span>outfit. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole has seen all of them in one way or the other, but they never get less sexy. Nicole’s arms prick with the need to wrap Wynonna up. So, she does. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna sags in Nicole’s arms straight away. Nicole teases next, “Oh geez so-rry for being gay and having the hottest woman in the world for a best friend.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The compliment draws a pleading, sweet twinkle into Wynonna’s crystal blues. “In the world, huh?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I could kiss her neck. I could run my tongue along the muscle and tell Wynonna just how beautiful she is. I could finally let her see. Finally show her. No. Not yet. Tonight is important. Remember the song. Remember Wynonna’s healing. Remember how far she’s come. With you. Beside you. Be steady.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Mhm. I know you didn't really dress up for me, 'Nonna, but you look amazing. All eyes are gonna be on you. And I'm proud of you. For doing the song. You sure you still want me to play?" Nicole’s tone is gentle but her arms are firm, holding Wynonna perfectly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna turns in those strong arms and brings both of her hands up to rest against Nicole’s chest. "There's nobody else I would want to play with me for this, Nic."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, ‘Nonna. Whatever you want.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly comes out of her room in a hurry. “‘Nonna, is Nic here? We gotta-- g- Oh! Hieeeee. Sorry, I-” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They don’t break apart. Waverly’s used to it. Waverly is tired of it, but she’s used to it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ready to go, Waves?” Nicole asks with a bright smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly guesses it isn’t so bad. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Rosita enters the space where the band waits to go on like she always does, but her energy is off. She looks distraught, but she’s trying to keep it together and even. The weight of something sets on her shoulders and Wynonna wonders if there is bile in her throat, because now, there’s bile in hers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I need to let you know there’s a guest here before you go on. It’s not good, but I need you to have time to prepare. I don’t want it to catch you off guard in the middle of a show.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Please. Not her. Please, God, anyone but her. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Wynonna begs silently. There’s only one fucking person that could throw her off. Only fucking one. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Michelle is here.” Rosita drops the bomb. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly goes rigid. The guilt washes over her like a tsunami and she suffocates in it. It seeps through her pores and radiates off of her. Guilt is written on every inch of Wavelry Earp, because she hadn’t told a single soul that Michelle Gibson would be at this show. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita’s careful eyes are trained on her and Waverly sees those soft brown eyes grow cold and hard. “You knew she was coming?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Who fucking knew she was coming!?” Wynonna bites, turning her head to see her little sister exuding shame. “Waverly... Waverly, you didn’t know. Please fucking tell me you didn’t know she was coming. Please, tell me you didn’t know.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s jaw tightens. Tears threaten to fall. “She texted me. But I-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She texted you and you didn’t tell me? When? When did she text you?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“On… the twelfth.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>The twelfth. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Their day for the baby they never got to meet. Two days ago. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Two days ago?” Rosita asks. She knows. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>All Waverly can do is nod. “But I didn’t… I th-thought she was just saying that. She bails on us all the time.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She bails on </span>
  <em>
    <span>you.</span>
  </em>
  <span> I don’t give her that power.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>”Waverly, you should’ve told Wynonna...” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole speaks up. Her voice is soft, but her jaw is tight. Waverly can see her struggling to keep her calm in the midst of Wynonna’s storm. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I—“ Waverly chokes, fighting tears, and just shakes her head. “I’m sorry I really thought—“ </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Save it,” Wynonna spits out, icy eyes staring at Waverly like she’s a stranger. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae, Waverly, and Rosita watch as Wynonna takes long quick strides to enter an adjacent room and get the hell away from her sister. Nicole doesn’t wait a second and follows closely behind. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita looks between Shae and Waverly. “Waverly, will you step outside with me for a minute?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae steps in close to Waverly and places a hand on her shoulder, stopping her from leaving just yet. Waverly won’t look up. Shae squeezes. “Waves? You don’t have to go.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s okay, Shae. I’ll be-- It’s okay. Rosie… Rosita just wants to talk.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The correction stings in Waverly’s throat. She hasn’t called their manager her full name in weeks? Days? Waverly doesn’t really remember calling her anything but. The stone cold in Rosita’s eyes makes her feel like that’s all gone now.    </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Rosita and Waverly step into the most private space they can find in the labyrinth of hallways backstage. Waverly folds her arms over her exposed abdomen. She feels ridiculous now. She wishes her original outfit was still in place on her body. She wishes she hadn’t tried so hard to look sexy… To draw attention to herself… From the very person who is staring her down right now. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why didn’t you tell me?” Rosita asks, voice cool as a cucumber and more terrifying than ever. Waverly almost wishes she was mad or upset. It’d be better. At least, Waverly would know she cares. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I really didn't think she'd come… Rosie..." She tries. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"No.” Rosita cuts her off. “If there was even a possibility of her being here… I should have known. Wynonna should have known.” Rosita finally breaks. Emotion returns to those rich brown eyes and Waverly wonders if she can see tears forming. “After what you told me about her... What she--” Rosita shakes her head. “I need to check on Wynonna." </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>“Wynonna…” Nicole speaks softly the moment Wynonna pauses in the small room. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Un-fucking-believable! Can you fucking believe that shit? Waverly fucking knew! She knew!” Wynonna paces back and forth, resisting the urge to slam her fist into the wall. The last thing she needs is to hurt herself before their show. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The anger bubbles within Nicole, too, quietly. The image of Michelle Gibson has always made Nicole seethe. She’s never formally met the woman, because Wynonna won’t be around her, but it looks like that may change tonight. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She’s gonna get back here. This fucking place won’t tell Michelle Fucking Gibson no. Piece of shit, absolute piece of shit. How am I going to avoid her?” Wynonna keeps going. Her hands open and close, over and over, hard and fast movements. Nicole finally steps in and grasps both of Wynonna’s hands in hers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna stills for the first time since the news dropped. She goes through her motions. She looks at Nicole’s hands. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole is here. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She turns her hands over and returns the grasp. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole is here. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Wynonna’s eyes slowly drag up Nicole’s arms. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole’s tattoos. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She continues to lift her head, eyes landing on Nicole’s lip piercing. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole’s lips. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Finally, she allows herself the comfort of… </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nicole’s eyes. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Bella Donna…” Nicole says quietly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Come in out of the darkness. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna feels the ache in her body release slightly. “I’m still pissed,” Wynonna says quietly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Me, too.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Waverly’s in deep fucking shit.” Wynonna tears her eyes away from Nicole and looks at their hands again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“‘Nonna…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna shakes her head. “Don’t fuckin take her side. Don’t do it, Nicole.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nonna...” Nicole repeats. “Look at me.” She tears one hand free of Wynonna’s and lifts Wynonna’s chin to bring those eyes back to her. “I’m not taking her side. She fucked up. Be mad. Be pissed. But, at the right person… She was trying to protect you and made a bad choice. We’ve done that like a hundred times by now.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna goes quiet. Nicole checks her without holding her with chains. Nicole always knows just how to approach her. “Thank you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shh… c’mere.” Nicole pulls Wynonna in and Wynonna settles against her chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita knocks her knuckles against the door a second later and slowly opens it. Wynonna refuses to break away. Her body is healing, settling. She can’t give this up. Rosita doesn’t seem to mind. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wyn? Hey, what do you want to do?” Rosita asks gently. She steps inside and closes the door behind her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What do you mean?” Wynonna asks, pulling her eyebrows together. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I can see if we can get her removed or-- Something... Keep her from coming back here..." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna blinks. Had she just heard Rosita correctly? Is this woman really offering to go up against one of the biggest names in country music for her? To protect her. Here in Nicole’s arms, with Rosita reassuring her and offering to do the impossible, Wynonna feels safe. No matter whether her shitty ass incubator is out in that audience or not, she has a whole network of women on her side. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Her side. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The smallest hint of a smile appears on Wynonna’s lips and she shrugs, still holding onto Nicole. "Nah, fuck it. Fuck</span>
  <em>
    <span> her.</span>
  </em>
  <span> We've got a show to do and I'm not letting her fuck me up anymore than she already has. Don't worry about it, Rose. But th-thank you." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita raises her hands, pushing them out in front of her a bit. "Are you sure?"</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna slinks out of Nicole's arms and nods. "You're really good to us, Bustillos." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole watches as Wynonna walks up to Rosita and wraps the woman up in her arms. She sees the shock and then the immediate relief on Rosita’s face. They melt together and Nicole melts at the sight of them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I got your back, Wyn. And I always will,” Rosita promises. “I think you're such a badass. I'm really proud of you. Thank you for letting me do this."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m really proud of you. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Those words are not common for Wynonna to hear. Most of her life, she’s screwed everything up. They warm her chest and push out all of the feelings Michelle Gibson raises within her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna thinks to herself, maybe Rose would be good to Waverly. Maybe, she should tell Waverly to go for it. At least one of them should be able to have what they want. Maybe, she’ll tell Waverly… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wordlessly, Wynonna pulls away from Rosita and opens the door to re-enter the main room. She spots Waverly holding herself, leaning against the wall, away from Shae. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae looks to Wynonna. “Are you okay?” She lowers her voice. “Waves won’t talk to me. I think she needs you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I need her, too,” Wynonna admits. “I’ll be okay, Pressman. Sorry us Earps come with so much baggage.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nons… It’s been three years. Stop apologizing for this shit. You might make me want to eat glass sometimes, but I would absolutely destroy anyone who hurt you or Waverly. Just like Haught. Don’t you know I have your back by now?” Shae steps to Wynonna and places her hands on her shoulders. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I know. Just… Hate being this shitty baggage or burden or whatever all the time.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shut up, dumbass. You’re not. Now go talk to Waves.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna listens. She leans against the wall, brushing her shoulder against Waverly’s. "I wish you'da told me. I'm still... Not really happy about that shit, okay? But I get it. Mama bails. Mama sucks. I get it."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly turns to look at her big sister with reddened eyes, shining with tears she couldn’t stop. "I never would have done this on purpose. I'm so sorry."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna pulls her baby sister into her arms. "Baby girl... Shit's always gonna suck when that woman's around... But I don't wanna fight with you."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The youngest Earp snuggles into Wynonna’s shoulder and begs, "Then, no fighting... I love you."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I love you back, baby girl. I’m still absolutely putting crumbs in all your thongs, but I love you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly laughs. “You’re gonna be amazing tonight, ‘Nonna.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck yeah, I am. Mama’s gonna see that she’s got nothing to do with what we’ve accomplished. Nothing. It’s all us, baby girl. Us, Haught, and Shae.” Wynonna pauses. A beat. “I’m not talking to her, Waves. She’s not welcome at the house. If you want to see her, I’m not gonna stop you, but do not invite her to our house.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay… I won’t. I hope you know… I’ll never forgive her for-- And I don’t want you to think I want you to, either. I just… can’t--”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I get it, Waves. Let’s get our shit back together.” </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna usually strains her eyes to look out into the audience. This time, she lets the lights blind her. She focuses on her band. She focuses on her girls. Her sister, Shae, Haught. They’re all on fire. Michelle couldn’t ruin this. Wynonna convinces herself that’s her mother’s goal, and remains hellbent on keeping the show perfect to rub it in her face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The time for </span>
  <em>
    <span>You Should Be Sad</span>
  </em>
  <span> comes and Wynonna comes out from behind her drums. The crowd loses their shit, whistling and cheering. Wynonna’s dimples deepen. The energy from the crowd is perfect. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole and Shae move around the stage and set up two microphones in front of stools. Nicole slings her acoustic guitar over her shoulder and holds out another one for Wynonna to take. They sit as close as they can with their instruments. Shae is back on bass. Waverly watches Wynonna with concern, playing long chords to fill the empty space. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna adjusts the mic and clears her throat. “This next song is old, but it’s never been played in public before. It’s a super personal journey for me and it kept me above the surface when I felt like the only person in the world I had was my baby sister.” Wynonna looks over to Waverly and smiles. “She’s pretty amazing. And I’m lucky she’s always been in my corner.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly nods and smiles back. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Anyways, this song is called </span>
  <em>
    <span>You Should Be Sad.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Singing this song in front of an audience feels better than Wynonna ever thought it would. Releasing all of that into the world, sharing it so that it doesn’t just sit on her shoulders… on Waverly’s and Nicole’s... on Alex’s… This releases so much more for Wynonna. She feels lighter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She looks over to Nicole and sees so much pride… and </span>
  <em>
    <span>love. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Wynonna feels it all barrel through her.</span>
</p>
<p><span>“Whew!” Wynonna says into the mic. It’s a good thing I called in a favor, because I think I need to be able to move around a little more for our next song. Who here is a fan of one of the best bands out there… </span><em><span>The Wilds?</span></em><span>”</span> <span>Wynonna asks. </span></p>
<p>
  <span>There’s thunderous applause and Wynonna grins. “Welcome to the stage and to my drums…” The applause grows. “My ex-girlfriend and very close friend… Alex Vice!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alex appears on stage, shaking her head and sitting down where Wynonna had been before the last song. “Can’t believe you roped me into canceling my V-Day plans for this, Earp.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh yeah, your </span>
  <em>
    <span>plans… </span>
  </em>
  <span>What, to rub one out to old vids of me on YouTube?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck you, dude,” Alex laughs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s so happy she got this part of their relationship back. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Anyways…” Wynonna shifts, putting the guitar up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole moves to get her electric guitar back and adjusts the microphone to a height she and Wynonna can share. It’s how they always do this song when Wynonna doesn’t have to drum. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A steady beat sounds with the kick drum as they settle. Wynonna moves in close to Nicole. They’re as close as they can be, sharing the microphone as Nicole starts to strum various notes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fun story about me and Haught if you don’t know it. I was playing in a cover band when she stalked me to my favorite record shop.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh please. I didn’t have a damn clue who you were,” Nicole interrupts. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Anyways, I invited Red to my show that weekend and called her up on stage without asking her. Like a champ, my Haughty rolled with it and the first song we ever sang together was </span>
  <em>
    <span>Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>More applause sounds. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, we’re gonna tap into that… Here’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>I Will Run to You.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole plays the intro to the song while Alex taps in right behind her. Eventually, Waves joins in with the keys and Shae with a mellow bass line. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna keeps her eyes on Haught as she plays… And as Nicole opens the song, singing first</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>One so young so changed</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Should not be left alone</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Two in love should confess</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>And not be left alone</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole singing these lyrics to her right after her soul-baring song hit harder than they ever have before. Nicole always sings them directly to her, but there’s a new charge between them. Wynonna’s cracked open and exposed. She feels everything. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Two in love. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Are they?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna sings harmonies through the first chorus with Nicole. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I will run to you</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Down whatever road you choose</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I will follow you down</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I will run to you</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna sings the next verse. Her hand comes up to the side of Nicole’s face. They grin and gravitate closer. The only thing separating them is the microphone. Without it, their lips might brush.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You've had time, come around</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Will you please make up your mind?</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I stand accused, on trial</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Will you please make up your mind?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Together, they sing again. Nicole is Tom Petty and Wynonna is Stevie Nicks. Wynonna wonders how she’s going to live through this. Every inch of her body aches with the need to pull Nicole in for a hard kiss. Visions of them tangled in her sheets flash in her mind as sweat drips down Nicole’s brow on stage. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I will run to you</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Down whatever road you choose</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I will follow you down</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I will run to you</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The two of them never look out into the audience. They never stop looking deep into one another’s eyes. Wynonna’s hands smooth down to Nicole’s chest, gripping at the fabric of her shirt as they sing the next verse. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Make it easy for me</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I been lonely baby</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Show some mercy honey</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I was nothing</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>All those lonely nights</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Showed me something</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>If you need me</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I'll come runnin'</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I will run to you</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Down whatever road you choose</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I will follow you down</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>
      <br/>
    </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>I will run to you</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The words to the song are finished, but there’s a musical outro. Wynonna moves behind Nicole and slides her hands over Nicole’s shoulders. Nicole leans back and bends her knees to give the shorter woman better access. Wynonna grins in the sexiest way, still unaware of the audience in front of them. Nicole plays without looking at her fingers, knowing this song with her eyes closed. She leans her head back against Wynonna’s and lets herself get lost. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna does watch Nicole’s fingers. She watches them move expertly over the strings and hit every note without fail. Her bottom lip is pulled between her teeth as she looks back to Haught, so close to her face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As the music fades, they remain. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shit, is it hot in here, or is it just </span>
  <em>
    <span>wynhaught?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Alex speaks into the mic by the drumset. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The spell breaks and Wynonna falls away from Nicole. Nicole stares after her with hungry eyes that Wynonna can’t miss, can’t deny, can’t ignore. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Shit. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna smirks on her way, walking backwards for a few steps to keep staring at Nicole. When she gets to the drums, Alex stands and shakes her head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t fucking say a word,” Wynonna warns, away from the mic where no one can hear them. Alex raises her hands and then waves towards the crowd. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>After the show, Wynonna stops Nicole and Alex before they get far from the stage. Waverly and Shae are heading back to the room, but Wynonna’s too afraid Michelle will be waiting there. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You two, sneak out with me,” Wynonna says. She’s not asking. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wyn, huh?” Alex questions. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I want to go home and get high with my best friends. Shae has plans with Cleo because they’re in love or whatever and it’s Valentine’s day, but I want to go home with both of you and get high and mellow out. Please, I need something to chill after the night I’ve had. Please,” she repeats. “Don’t make me risk running into my mom.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole and Alex look to one another. Alex shrugs and Nicole nods. In unison, they say. “Okay.” </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Alex and Nicole stumble in, laughing, behind Wynonna who opens the door for all of them. “I’ll go get my shit. Y’all sit your hot asses down.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s two best friends in the world fall onto the couch with a small space in between them. “Haught, you were on fucking fire tonight,” Alex compliments. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shut up, I was just feeding off of Wynonna. She was the one that carried the show.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nah, you two feed off each other. No wonder you guys have a following online. Chemistry’s solid.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole shakes her head. Some days, she can’t see past her jealousy of Alex. Alex at least got to have Wynonna for a short time. Alex got to kiss her… To love her in the dark… Alex fell in love with Wynonna, but Wynonna swears she couldn’t love her back. Nicole knows if Wynonna couldn’t love Alex like that, she could never love her like that either. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Losers, stop making out! Wait until I’m here and can watch,” Wynonna jokes, walking in with her pipe, lighter, and baggie. She falls between the small space between them. They’re all so close. Wynonna needs the proximity, needs the physical comfort she gets from them both. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole puts her arm on the back of the couch behind Wynonna and Alex grins, placing her arm over Nicole’s. Nicole raises an eyebrow at the contact, but she doesn’t pull away from it. She knows what Alex is doing. They’re surrounding Wynonna, shielding her from the world. Nicole can’t be mad about that. The both of them would do anything in the world for Wynonna. They have more in common than Nicole likes to admit. Alex is as close to perfect as it gets. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>What Nicole doesn’t know… is Alex thinks the same about her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Can I ask you guys to try something before we get too far gone?” Nicole asks, nerves rising and making the hairs on the back of her neck stand up. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Look, if you’re gonna ask for a threesome, Haught, don’t bother. Lex would never humor me…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alex smacks Wynonna’s shoulder. “What’s up, Nic?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole rubs her chin with the back of her hand. “I’ve been uh, thinking lately that I think I might wanna try to use… Different pronouns.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna and Alex soften and listen attentively. No more jokes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Which ones?” Wynonna asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m still cool with she and her but, I think I want to see how they and them feel?” Nicole phrases as a question. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lex?” Wynonna starts.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, Wyn?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nicole was so great up on stage tonight, weren’t they?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck yeah. Their solos tonight? Fucking immaculate. Perfect.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole listens, staying out of what they’re doing. The guitarist hadn’t even had to tell them what to do. Alex and Wynonna fell into it so easily. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Have you ever seen them play </span>
  <em>
    <span>Neon </span>
  </em>
  <span>by John Mayer? They’re so damn sexy when they play that song.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shit, you know what? I don’t remember them playing that. Do you think they’d play for me if I asked them?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s smile is so wide, so deep. Their dimples indent so far into their face that they duck their head as they shake it. “Thank you guys.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How’d that feel, Nic?” Wynonna asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think I want to use both, at least for now? So could you guys maybe switch it up every now and then?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lex, could we use both for her?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We could definitely use both for them.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole nods again. “Thank you. Now, let’s get high, please. That just shot my nerves through the roof.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna gets them started and they pass it around. Wynonna cracks jokes, thanks them for coming home with her, and slinks back against the couch. It only takes a few moments for the high to kick in before they’re all laughing about Alex droning on about how iced coffee is better than hot coffee any time of the year. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“See this is why we never fuckin’ could have worked.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I gotta agree with Lex,” Nicole shrugs. “Iced coffee is way better.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What the fuck is this? You two are not supposed to gang up on me.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, it’s easy to do when you’re wrong,” Alex teases. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole laughs and leans their head against Wynonna’s shoulder. Alex leans in, too, so they’re both snug against the woman in the middle. Wynonna’s hands come up to the backs of both of their heads. Wynonna can’t believe that she escaped her mother’s wrath and that she’s nestled between Alex and Nicole. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know what? Why don’t you two just kiss and get it over with?” Wynonna urges through laughter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What!?” Nicole snorts. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alex just keeps snickering against Wynonna’s shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m serious, you two have been giving vibes all fucking night, just kiss already. Plus, it’d be hot.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole shakes her head, still laughing. “You’re high as fuck.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So the fuck are you,” Wynonna bites back. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Here, Haught, c’mon just kiss me,” Alex says, reaching out with her hand on the side of Nicole’s face. “She won’t shut up until we do.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole leans in close to Alex and grins. “Are you sure, Lex? You wanna kiss me?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why not?” Alex shrugs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” Wynonna chants. Her hands are still resting on the backs of their heads. Their faces are so close to hers. She can feel both of their breaths. It takes everything inside of her not to kiss the both of them, too. But, she can’t. That’s why she’s pushing them towards each other. She can’t kiss Alex without tearing her open and she can’t kiss Nicole without tearing herself open. This is the closest she can get.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you wanna kiss me, Nic?” Alex asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why not?” Nicole echoes, their voice lower than before. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna is hotter beneath her skin than she’s ever been. Her blunt nails scratch against the scalps of both of her short-haired friends as they close the space between them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Wynonna sucks in a harsh breath. It </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>hot. God, it’s hot. And Wynonna wishes she could be Alex when she sees Nicole’s tongue move into her ex-girlfriend’s mouth. Alex welcomes it and makes a soft noise. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s over before Wynonna wants it to be and the other women fall into laughter again. Wynonna can’t help but join. Nicole turns her head towards Wynonna, leaning her forehead against hers. Nicole dips her head in close. Their lips almost brush but Wynonna shoves her back. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Not like this. Not like this. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole doesn’t put up a fight and slumps back against Wynonna’s shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So… How was it?” Wynonna asks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Good, but I didn’t feel anything. Sorry, Lex. Mmm… The only person I wanna kiss is ‘Nonna,” Nicole admits, laughing through the words. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna stops. Her sobriety washes over her and she looks at the redhead, still delirious and care-free. Does she even know what she’s just said? Wynonna turns to look at her ex-girlfriend, and Alex is more there than Nicole, too. She’s there with Wynonna. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alex raises her eyebrows, but keeps her lips sealed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright, Haughty, I think it’s time we all go to bed. You’re getting into loopy ass territory and that’s when I know I need to put your ass to bed,” Wynonna explains as light-heartedly as she can manage, totally ignoring Nicole’s declaration. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lex, you’re staying too,” Wynonna continues. “My bed’s big enough for the three of us.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ah, I can take the couch,” Alex offers.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No. Please,” Wynonna begs softly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alex understands and simply nods. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, Lex, come get the friend cuddlies. A fuddly!” Nicole jokes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna falls even harder for the redhead, running her hand through that short hair. “You’re a fuckin’ cute stoner, Haught.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thanks.” </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna and Alex help Nicole get into sleep clothes and then dress themselves. Wynonna settles in the middle of them. Nicole reaches for her and pulls her close without a second thought. They’re face-to-face, breaths mixing. Their lips are so close to touching again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s almost gone, Wynonna knows it. But this is why she asked Lex to sleep with them. She was afraid of what might happen if she’s left alone with a Nicole Haught who can’t hide their feelings… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The brunette shifts so that she can tuck her head under Nicole’s chin against her chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole tightens her hold on her. "I love you so much, Wynonna. I’d do anything for you. I just love you so fucking much." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna snuggles in closer. “I know, Haught. I love you, too."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I know. You're the best. My favorite person in the world. I wanna hold you like this every night." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alex is awake, listening to every word. And she feels peaceful. She sees it, maybe more than anyone else, because she knows what it’s like to be loved by Wynonna Earp. Wynonna couldn’t love her like </span>
  <em>
    <span>this, </span>
  </em>
  <span>but Alex can see it. And Alex wants Wynonna to have it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Night, Nic. Night, Lex,” Wynonna murmurs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Night, Wyn.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Night, ‘Nonna.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. caught in the middle</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Michelle Gibson makes her way backstage to see Waverly and meets Rosita. Wynonna, Alex, and Nicole wake up in bed together the next morning and the high is all gone.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Waverly is the first one back in the room after their show ends. Rosita is sitting on the couch, tapping away at her phone when she becomes aware of Waverly’s entrance. As she lifts her head, Waverly notes she looks softer than before the show--like the way she’s always looked at her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Where is everyone?” Rosita asks softly, putting her phone away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shae ran off to be with Cleo and Wynonna and Nicole… Well… I bet Wynonna is going to do anything to avoid mama.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita lets her head roll to the side, narrowing her eyes at Waverly. “You want to see her,” Rosita figures. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly crosses her arms over her body and tries to sink into herself. “I know it’s stupid-”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not stupid,” Rosita interrupts before Waverly can continue. The older woman stands to her feet and walks over to where Waverly’s standing, invading Waverly’s space. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly smells cherry blossoms. She sucks in a deep breath through her nose and lets Rosita’s aroma calm and excite her. The next moment, she kicks herself for letting herself fall so easily back into this dumb crush that will never go anywhere. Rosita clearly cares more about Wynonna than she ever--</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Waves, I’m sorry,” Rosita continues. “I was really harsh earlier. I get protective when I c-- when people come near my clients. I know after what you told me you’d never-- Hurt Wynonna like that. I was out of line.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This is so not what Waverly expected when entering the room and seeing only Rosita sitting here. Part of her had wondered if the woman would even speak to her. She certainly would have never anticipated an apology. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I-I’m sorry, too. Even if I didn’t think she was coming… I still should have said something.” Waverly heaves a deep sigh and lets her tight grip on her own body loosen until her arms fall to her sides. “It’s not the first time something like this has happened. She’s popped in on us before… It just happens more times than not that she--”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Waves…” Rosita reaches for one of Waverly’s hands and gently massages her thumb into the back of it. “I get it. Next time, we’ll both do better.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Next time? We? Both? Just Rosie and me? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly thinks all at once. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not stupid, though, to want to see your mom. Even when she’s done some fucked up shit.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know… I barely even think about Michelle as my mom… </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘Mama’ </span>
  </em>
  <span>doesn’t even feel like the meaning of the word. It feels… like a warning… a curse,” Waverly laughs humorlessly. “Wynonna raised me. She was my sister, my mom, my dad, my whatever-- My hero. It was all Wynonna, but… when Mama comes around… I just turn back into that little girl who couldn’t say no to her because I didn’t want Wynonna to get cut off or for daddy to lock her in the cellar.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita’s reaction to the ultimate revelation is small, but Waverly notes the way the older woman’s jaw tightens and releases. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry! Gah! You didn’t ask for me to keep unloading all this bullshit on you-- God, I always overshare. You’re not my therapist.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, but I am here for you.” Rosita squeezes Waverly’s hand to remind her that she’s still holding it. “Look, I have them screening Michelle from getting back here. I told them that you all always have at least a half hour to yourselves before anyone is allowed back here. She’s apparently being incessant, though. She’s got a real superiority complex about how important she is…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Tell me about it.” Waverly takes in another sharp breath. “Let her back here. It looks like Wynonna’s not coming.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you sure? You’ve still got a good twenty something minutes before it gets way harder to keep her from getting back here.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s green eyes find their hands and she grips Rosita’s fingers. It’s her last grasp at the comfort Rosita radiates before Michelle wrecks her world. Nerves make Waverly begin to tremble just so. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“C’mere,” Rosita nearly whispers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The next thing Waverly knows, she’s wrapped up in small, but strong arms. The scent from earlier absolutely floods her nostrils and the sensation makes its way through every inch of her body. Goosebumps erupt all over Waverly’s skin as she sinks into the embrace without a second of hesitation. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you want me to stay or go?” Rosita asks quietly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly considers for long moments and Rosita lets her. She doesn’t ask or speak again while Waverly deliberates. Finally the pianist replies, “Stay. At least… a little while.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ll stay as long as you want me to.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly nods against Rosita’s shoulder. “Thank you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t mention it, Waves.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They step apart. Waverly brings her right hand over to her left forearm and rubs over the skin over and over. Rosita types a message out on her phone and hits send. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>“Finally! Jesus Christ, you all really don’t know who the hell you’re dealing with. Those are my fucking daughters and </span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>am Michelle fucking Gibson.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly hears that voice before she even gets to the door. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Yep. Mama being Mama</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she thinks, rolling her eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita’s eyes stay trained on Waverly. She doesn’t give a single shit about meeting </span>
  <em>
    <span>Michelle Fucking Gibson. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Even before she started working with the Earp sisters, she had heard tale after tale about this nightmarish diva. Now, it’s personal. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The manager cannot believe how quickly and how effortlessly the Earp women had won her over. The two of them seem to inspire that reaction. Shae and Nicole protect these women with every ounce of themselves. These women protect them back. The Earp sisters feel unreal in a way. How can a pair of sisters be so incredibly… indescribable? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The door flies open and Michelle comes waltzing in with the most irritating aura of importance around her. An exaggerated expression of adoration appears on her face when she sees Waverly. Not a single part of Rosita buys it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“My baby!” Michelle practically screeches with her arms extended in front of her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey mama,” Waverly says softly, but makes no move to complete the embrace. She doesn’t need to. Mama has her wrapped up in her arms, pressing kiss after kiss to the side of her face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita watches Waverly’s expression carefully. </span>
  <em>
    <span>She looks so sad. She doesn’t buy it any more than you do, but she wants it to be true, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Rosita reasons silently. Sad Waverly really is the worst fucking thing in the world. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You were so wonderful tonight! You are so talented, little one!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Michelle cradles Waverly’s face in her hands the way a mother should, but none of the comfort follows. Why does she never feel the comforting touch of her mother’s hand and calm? Why does she keep hoping and praying for it to come and expecting a different outcome every single time? She feels foolish. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you, mama. I’m glad you enjoyed the show.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Where’s your sister?” Michelle questions, looking around and eyes finally settling on Rosita. “And who is this?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Rosita Bustillos, Ms. Gibson,” Rosita answers, offering her hand. Michelle doesn’t take it, only eyes it suspiciously. “I’m managing </span>
  <em>
    <span>Chasing Skylarks </span>
  </em>
  <span>now.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Right. I haven’t heard of you before.” It’s an insult and Waverly snaps her head towards Rosita immediately with apologetic eyes and a mouth parted in offense.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You probably wouldn’t have. There aren’t many queer artists in country music and something tells me you don’t really work with Chely Wright that often…” Rosita returns evenly, entirely unfazed by what Michelle thought was a dig. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hmm.” Michelle runs her tongue along the inside of her cheek, clearly annoyed at Rosita’s resilience. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly watches the entire thing unfold and her crush on Rosita… gets so much </span>
  <em>
    <span>worse. God, she’s so sexy, </span>
  </em>
  <span>she thinks, biting her lip. None of her crushes or significant others would have dreamed of going toe-to-toe with her mother. The only one of Wynonna’s who had anything to do with Mama had been the abusive asshole. Wynonna never allows anyone else to meet her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But Rosita… Rosita doesn’t cower and she doesn’t falter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think ‘Nonna had plans,” Waverly lies without missing a beat. “It is Valentine’s Day, y’know.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Right. Is she dating that guitarist in your band?” Michelle questions with contempt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nicole? No… They’re just best friends, but that’s probably who she’s with…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You sure she’s not with that drummer she called her ex-girlfriend?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, she could be. They’re best friends, too… Why?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Michelle raises her eyebrows quickly and tsks. “Nothing. Just that I would like to see my oldest but I guess some things never change with her.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What’s that supposed to mean?” Waverly asks, taking the defensive position. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh nothing, little one. Let me take you out to dinner. I’ll buy.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When Waverly looks to Rosita, Rosita locks eyes with her in an instant, searching, trying to see if Waverly is afraid or hesitant, if she wants an out. Michelle tilts her head and looks between them suspiciously. “Unless you have some unfinished business here…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita doesn’t speak. She quirks a single eyebrow to silently ask Waverly what she needs. Hopefully, the bond that they share, albeit new, would be enough for Rosita to make the right move if necessary. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Please, let me get this right. I fucked up earlier. I don’t want Waves to think I don’t care. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, Mama,” Waverly finally says, turning back to her mother. “We’re all done here but we do have an early morning, so I can’t stay out long. And Wynonna will probably be asleep by the time we get done so it’s probably best if you just go back to your hotel after.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosita jumps in, lying easily for Waverly. “Yeah. The label wants a track list soon and we need to get on the same page.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Right…” Mama isn’t buying it. Waverly panics for a moment, but it seems Michelle doesn’t want to pick a fight this time. “Well! I can at least have a good dinner with my miracle before I have to hit the road again.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly sags. When Michelle turns to walk towards the door, Waverly mouths a silent </span>
  <em>
    <span>thank you </span>
  </em>
  <span>to Rosita who nods back at her with a small smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Call me after? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Rosita mouths back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>What? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly blinks. Rosita wants her to call her later? Why? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t fuck it up. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She nods and smiles softly to herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You coming?” Michelle calls, growing impatient at the door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, Mama. I’m coming.” </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>“That manager of yours…” Michelle begins disdainfully. “What do you know about her?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly realizes that she would rather talk about just about anything else with her mother besides Rosita. Surely, this woman would have nothing kind to say about her super hot, super sweet manager that hadn’t taken her shit for even a second. The thought causes her stomach to churn. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Rosita? She’s worked with a couple bigger names in the industry. She’s landed us a bunch of really great gigs and got us a record deal that we’re all really happy with. Her other clients said nothing but good stuff about her! And she’s really had our backs.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Seems like a bitch to me,” Michelle remarks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mama!” Waverly scolds immediately. She pokes at her food with her fork. “You barely even talked to her. You just don’t like that she didn’t let you insult her.” Waverly murmurs the last part quietly, still frightened to stand up to her mother even though there will be no real repercussions. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What did you say to me?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing, Mama. Just… Let’s talk about something else. How is everything?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’ve been living alone with Wynonna too long. You’re getting that smart mouth of hers.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ve always lived alone with Wynonna,” Waverly murmurs to herself, this time too quiet for Michelle to catch it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Speak up, little one,” Michelle commands coldly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I just want to know how your life is, Mama. Can we talk about you?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course…”</span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Waverly pulls into the drive and the first thing she notices is that both Alex’s and Nicole’s cars are still parked there. It’s rare to see Alex and Nicole in the same space, even with Wynonna. Nicole’s jealousy gets the better of them most of the time. Waverly is thankful that they’re both here, though, undoubtedly distracting Wynonna from the presence of their mother lingering. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She enters the house with a heavy sigh, still reeling from the complete and utter way dinner with their mother had drained her. The smell of marijuana slaps her in the face, but the three of them are nowhere to be found in the living room. The baggie and burned up joint rest on the coffee table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh god… Did they... ?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The house is silent. Wynonna isn’t exactly </span>
  <em>
    <span>quiet </span>
  </em>
  <span>when she has… </span>
  <em>
    <span>guests. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Please have clothes on… Please have clothes on… Please have clothes on,” Waverly whispers as she makes her way to Wynonna’s door. Slowly and silently, she turns the handle and peeps into the room. The sight melts her. They’re all sleeping.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alex is lying on her back with her arm above her head, face turned toward the other two. Wynonna is tucked neatly under Nicole’s chin, being held so tightly by the tall redhead. The two of them fit. Somehow, the presence of that third body makes Waverly wonder what happened between the three of them. Why isn’t Lex on the couch? She is </span>
  <em>
    <span>so </span>
  </em>
  <span>bugging Wynonna about this when the two of them leave. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly readies herself for bed and checks the time. It’s late. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Call me after? </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No.. It’s too late,” Waverly tells herself, scrolling to Rosita’s contact. She taps the message icon. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Waverly: </b>
  <em>
    <span>You still awake? </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Rosita: </b>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah. You feel like calling me? </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The reply is immediate and Waverly chews on her lip at the question. She answers it by tapping the call icon. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hey, Waves. How was it?” </span>
  </em>
  <span>Rosita’s voice is soft and scratchy, like always, but also different. They’ve never talked like this before. Rosita’s all business all the time with her, but this… Waverly settles herself more comfortably in the bed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um. It wasn’t great. She was… not nice. But that’s not new. She kept insulting Wynonna… And fishing for me to say something bad about you. She’s just…” Waverly sighs. “She always wants everything but her to be awful.” </span>
  <em>
    <span>When she’s the awful thing, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Waverly leaves unspoken.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m sorry. I’ve had people like that in my life. Not my mom, but… some people can’t stand to see other people happy. That’s all, Waves. I know it’s tough, but try not to let her get to you.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly laughs softly. “You… are so nice all the time. I can’t imagine people being awful to you. I can’t believe my mom said you seemed like a bitch.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Heh… Well, I can be. Especially when someone, especially another woman, tries to make me feel inferior.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I’m sorry. That’s just… Her thing.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Don’t apologize for her. You’re not responsible for that.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay…” Waverly smiles softly at the reassurance. Rosita makes her feel brave. She admits, “I stood up to her a little… Just a little, but, I think that… seeing you do it helped.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There’s a long pause and Waverly wonders if Rosita hung up the phone or if she’s just weirded her out. But Rosita speaks so softly with such sincerity a moment later, </span>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m glad. Are you okay?” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This woman will surely be the death of her. Waverly has resigned herself to this fact and she will love every moment of this long, painstakingly slow demise. Waverly pauses to really consider the answer. “You know… I am. I’m alright. I usually end up crying when she’s gone, but I mostly feel tired and that could be because of the show. Plus Wyn’s sleeping really hard and that’s usually the worst part of Mama visits--getting her to calm down. So… Yeah, I’m alright.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m glad you’re both okay. You need to get some sleep. Since you’re so tired. We don’t actually have an early morning, so get as much sleep as you need.” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay… Rosie?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hmm?” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you. For everything. I didn’t know having a manager would be like this, but I’m really… grateful for you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“It isn’t always like this. You just lucked out with me, huh?” </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly giggles. “I guess so.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Get some sleep, Waves. I’ll see you later. Goodnight.”</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Night, Rosie.” </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Alex is awake and watching them when Nicole’s eyes open. The high is gone… The memories are not. They’d shared that they’d been thinking about her pronouns. She’d made out with Alex and Alex was a good kisser. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh no. </span>
  </em>
  <span>The confession sounds more loudly in their head than anything else from the night before.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>The only person I wanna kiss is ‘Nonna. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Morning, Nic,” Lex whispers, hoping not to wake the still sleeping woman in Nicole’s arms. “You okay?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um, yeah. You?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mhm. Been a while since I had a good kiss.” Alex gives them a wink and Nicole can’t help the redness that appears on her cheeks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, uh. Yeah, me too.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna stirs, rubbing her face against the fabric of Nicole’s shirt and grumbling. “Haught…” she murmurs. “You smell like weed.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We all smell like weed, Wyn,” Alex corrects. “But I gotta get going so you two get your lazy asses up and walk me out.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole and Wynonna stay dressed in their sleeping clothes and walk Alex out to the front door. When they reach it, Alex turns to the both of them and flashes them a sideways grin. “Last night was fun. We should do that again soon.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, you just wanna make out with Nic again,” Wynonna teases. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh I definitely do,” Alex teases back, raising a challenging eyebrow. She looks up at the tall guitarist with a glint in her eye. Without much warning, Alex gets up on her tiptoes, snakes her hands through Nicole’s hair and pulls her in for a goodbye kiss. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Instinct takes over and Nicole’s hands go to the small of Alex’s back, pulling her in and kissing her back for a few moments. Their eyebrows shoot up, but there’s no move to separate or stop kissing Alex. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna watches and feels the blood in her veins begin to bubble and beat with pure jealousy. It’s not as fun to watch them kiss without the buzz of the marijuana. In fact, it makes her want to shove Alex out the door and slam it in her face. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You have no right. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alex goes flat on her feet again and grins up at Nicole “You should call me later, Nic.” Alex turns to Wynonna and resists the urge to belly laugh at the way she seethes with envy. “I’ll text you later, ‘Nons.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, fuck you, Alex,” Wynonna tries to sound playful, but the venom is there. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s eyebrows pull together at the exchange. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Is that… jealousy? No. They’re fucking with each other and Nicole’s just… There. Wynonna would never be jealous of someone else, least of all Alex getting to kiss her. Especially if she remembers what she said last night. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sorry, ‘Nons. You can’t do that anymore.” Alex pouts exaggeratedly. “See you two. Try not to have too much fun without me today.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Then, Alex is gone. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna looks up at Nicole who stares back at her with pleading, shining and begging eyes like always. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Do you remember what I said? </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole screams within the confines of her mind. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, what? You’re gonna mack on my ex-girlfriend now, Haught?” Wynonna asks, less than friendly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?! No, Wyn.. She was just fucking with us both. Isn’t that just… how she is?” Nicole defends herself passionately. </span>
  <em>
    <span>God, don’t you remember what I said, Wynonna?! I only want to kiss you. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s body shifts and relaxes before her head dips down. “Yeah, I guess. I just… Don’t wanna be a third wheel with you two. I know that’s selfish and fucked up, but you two are like... The only ones I feel like.. are--” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are what?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Mine, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Wynonna thinks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“There for me all the time.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t feel like that about Alex. She’s a good kisser, but I don’t really want to kiss her again. I don’t want to kiss--”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna turns away from Nicole and takes off for the bedroom. “Good. That’s good. No losing my best friends because they’re gonna date each other. That’s good.” Wynonna interrupts them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole frowns. If Wynonna remembers what she said, she sure isn’t going to show it or talk about it.</span>
  <em>
    <span> Great. More fucking pretending. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Nicole sighs and they’re about to speak again when there’s a knock at the door. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Lex probably forgot something. Can you get that?” Wynonna calls over her shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole groans, turning to pull the door open with annoyance on their face. The person standing there is not Alex. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ms. Gibson…” Nicole breathes out in disbelief.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. anything could happen</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Why is Michelle here? Is she genuine? Which parts are lies? Cleo stays plugged in online and wonders if a headline could stir up trouble.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>“Ms. Gibson…” Nicole breathes out in disbelief.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna stops, frozen in her trek to her bedroom, and refuses to turn around. There’s no way in hell Nicole just said what she thinks she heard. There is absolutely no way that her mother is standing in her doorway, looking at Nicole in her jamjams. Please, God, do not let Nicole be meeting her mother in underwear and a sleeveless shirt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nicole Haught,” Michelle’s icy voice reaches Wynonna next. The words strike like a double-edged sword, outwardly sweet but equally poisonous. “At last, I get to meet my daughter’s… What are you again?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m her…” Nicole opens their mouth to answer, but she’s interrupted.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The question slaps Wynonna back into herself and she turns to face the woman so quickly with fire in her blue eyes. She stands about a foot behind Nicole and states strongly. “Mine. That’s all you need to know.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Michelle raises an eyebrow at her daughter, looking past the dumbstruck redhead with her hand still on the door, acting as a shield between Michelle and the Earp women. “What about the one that just left? Is she yours, too?” Michelle asks, voice even and terrifying. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What are you doing here?” Wynonna asks, trying to echo the coldness. Nicole stands firmly planted between them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Soft footsteps sound next as Waverly makes her way into the room, walking straight to Wynonna’s side. “Who’s here? I heard knock--” The youngest Earp turns her head when she sees Wynonna’s stone-faced expression and her eyes land on the answer to her question. She whispers. “Wynonna, I swear I didn’t invite--”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, I only got to see one of my girls last night. Can I come in and catch up with the other one?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The other one,” Wynonna shoots back with a humorless laugh. “Follow my socials. You can catch up with me there.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wynonna…” Waverly warns quietly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No. I avoided you last night for a reason, Mama. You weren’t invited to our home. I have nothing for you, so why are you here?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Michelle tilts her head at Wynonna’s boldness, then looks at Nicole who has barely blinked since this whole ordeal began. “Would you mind letting me in?” She asks, ignoring her daughter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t live here. Can’t let you in.” Nicole shrugs.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But you can keep me out?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna finally forces herself to take the final steps towards the two of them at the door, placing herself beside Nicole and taking their hand to steady herself. “Why do you want in here, Mama? Please just answer the question. I’m really not in the mood for this pissing contest, but I’m not just gonna let you do whatever the hell you want anymore.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Michelle’s eyes drop to their linked hands for just a second. Although she raises an eyebrow, the rest of her face remains stoic. Wynonna can’t clock what she’s thinking, but she grips Nicole’s hand tighter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I heard about the record deal. Obviously.” Mama begins, looking up at Wynonna’s face and then past her, to Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay?” Wynonna raises her eyebrow, matching Michelle’s expression from moments ago. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And I met your manager last night. She seemed… sweet.” Michelle’s lips turn up in an almost sneaky sort of smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s jaw tightens immediately. Michelle had said the exact </span>
  <em>
    <span>opposite</span>
  </em>
  <span> to her the night before. Was one night too short of a time for someone to have a change of heart? Had anything Waverly said helped her, reached her somehow?  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The youngest Earp wants to be hopeful. More than anything. Her heart and her lungs ache and burn to hope, so hard it almost puts tears in her eyes. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Waverly thinks. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t give yourself more than just maybe. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The tone her mama uses makes Wynonna narrow her eyes, leaning more into Nicole without really realizing it. Her chest starts to ache in a familiar way and her palms feel hot and tingly. As much as she’s trying, she can’t seem to figure out if Michelle is being genuine or not. It’s been this way her entire goddamn life and still hasn’t gotten easier. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, she is. Rosie’s the best. Still doesn’t tell me why you wanna come inside.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, maybe she just wants to talk about it?” Waverly tries, her arms crossed over her chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna turns her head towards her baby sister and lifts both eyebrows. Immediately, the look Waverly gives back tells Wynonna that she isn’t trying to defend their mom. It’s a silent language between the two of them at this point, they can read each other. Wynonna believes Waverly, no matter how twisted up her gut feels. She softens, but only a little bit. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s exactly right.” Mama chimes in, smiling past the older two towards Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s hand brushes against her bicep nervously, nails scratching lightly at her skin without thought. She forces a tight smile back to Michelle, but her stomach is just as knotted as Wynonna’s. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You wanna talk about the record deal…” Wynonna turns back to Michelle and treads lightly with her words. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I’d just like to go over everything. Make sure it’s all good for you two. Honest. I’m –- really proud of you for doing this all on your own.” Michelle’s voice seems softer, more of an attempt to garner their trust. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna fights every impulse in her body to look up at Nicole and silently beg for the answer. It’s almost as if Nicole can tell, because they squeeze Wynonna’s hand gently as if to say ‘I’m here.’ </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Besides, I was being honest before, too. I didn’t get to see you last night and I miss you.” Michelle doesn’t sound completely full of shit and Wynonna doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She knows that no matter what, Nicole will be there for her. She won’t have to do this alone the way she had so many times before. And Waverly isn’t a kid anymore either. She’s a grown woman who seems pretty determined not to let their mother walk all over either of them. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna pulls in a deep breath and lets it go, finally nodding once and stepping to the side. Nicole follows suit and the way they move together puts Wynonna right up against her, her back pressed against Nicole’s front. Nicole never pulls their hand from Wynonna’s. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright, fine. But Haught and I have somewhere to be in a couple of hours, so we can’t hang forever.” Wynonna sighs, motioning for mama to finally come into the house. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And I’m going with them, too, so…” Waverly grins. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna and Nicole can both tell it’s fake. That Waverly is giving herself the same excuse so that she doesn’t get stuck spending more alone time with Michelle. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Seeing two of the women she loves so much pack themselves into boxes like this puts a dull ache in Nicole’s chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s alright, girls. I’ll be in town for a little while.” Mama smirks, following Waverly’s lead towards the kitchen. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna is following behind but stops when Michelle says that, turning and looking up at Nicole’s face finally. Those big brown eyes look down into hers and she feels reassurance deep in her bones, in her soul. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Two big hands come to rest on her shoulders and turn her around. She feels a soft kiss on the top of her head and then Nicole pushes her forward, keeping their hands on her the whole walk. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m here, Wynonna. I’ll never leave you. Never.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna walks through </span>
  <em>
    <span>Steve’s Music Store, </span>
  </em>
  <span>staring up at the wall of cymbals. She lets her fingers run over different ones, feeling the cool metal against her skin. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They hadn’t actually had some place to be, but whenever any of them needed to unwind, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Steve’s</span>
  </em>
  <span> always helped. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you think mama was being honest? About everything she said?” Waverly asks timidly, flipping through the big book of Elvis piano chords she’d been looking at ever since they came into the store. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole is sitting a few feet away, quietly playing </span>
  <em>
    <span>I Won’t Back Down</span>
  </em>
  <span> by Tom Petty on a shiny blue acoustic guitar. There's a shelf separating her and the sisters but she can hear what Waverly says. It makes them lift her head and play more softly, trying to hear the two women better. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think what she said about the business stuff was mostly right.” Wynonna admits, heaving a heavy sigh. The breath blows a string of her blonde hair more into her face and she reaches from the cymbals to tuck it back behind her ear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly looks up from the book, swallowing roughly. She’s smart, but in reality, she doesn’t know as much about the business they’re in as her sister does. Wynonna’s word is worth its weight when it comes to that, and if she really thinks their mom was being sincere, then she knows they have to talk about the points Michelle made with Rosita. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s not anything too serious, mostly just small worries. Will they reach a wide enough audience if they just keep playing shows in Toronto? Is it even realistic to think about expanding? Things like that. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly’s more concerned with knowing that mama lied to Wynonna’s face about Rosita than almost anything else. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t think she likes Rosie very much.” Waverly breathes, her eyes tracing over the page, following the notes of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Can’t Help Falling in Love. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna turns away from the wall of cymbals to face the younger woman, raising an eyebrow. Her hands slip into the pockets of her leather jacket where she runs a finger over the small hole that’s worn itself into the fabric. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What makes you think that?” Wynonna doesn’t doubt it. Their mother could hate anyone for any reason. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Including her own daughter. </span>
  </em>
  <span>She starts chewing at the inside of her lip at that thought. </span>
  <em>
    
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well…last night at dinner she kinda called her a bitch to me? She said she seemed like one.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Blue eyes narrow at Waverly and Wynonna steps closer, tilting her head slightly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She said Rosita, of all people, seemed like a bitch? Our mama? The bitchiest bitch who has ever bitched? Huh…” Wynonna laughs humorlessly, looking up and shaking her head. Her tongue peeks out the corner of her mouth in her annoyance. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As if on cue, Nicole stands up and comes around the shelf, their hands clasped together in front of her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And then she said she seemed </span>
  <em>
    <span>sweet</span>
  </em>
  <span> to your face this morning.” Waverly’s voice is sad and she looks completely crestfallen. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole immediately steps to her side, wrapping a long, strong arm around Waverly’s narrow shoulders and pulling her into their side. The small woman sinks immediately into her friend’s side, resting her head against Nicole’s shoulder and doing her best not to cry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The redhead leans her cheek against the top of Waverly’s head, doing their best to be soothing without intruding with words. She knows by now that to the two of them, her input wouldn’t actually be an </span>
  <em>
    <span>intrusion</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but still decides it’s better to let them talk. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You don’t think maybe… her changing her mind is possible?” Waverly tries, voicing the thought she’d had earlier in the day. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna laughs again and the venom behind the sound makes Waverly instantly turn her head more into Nicole’s warm chest, hot tears welling up in her green eyes. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Baby girl… don’t cry, okay?” Wynonna softens. “I’m not –- I’m not surprised. Like at all. It sucks. It fucking sucks that she lied. But what’s fuckin’ new, right?” The oldest Earp reaches out a ringed hand to rest over Haught’s on Waverly’s bicep. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The immense comfort that comes from her friend and her sister’s softer tone and touch makes the dam break and Waverly starts to cry. The night before had been so heavy, she felt absolutely exhausted when she got home and the only thing that helped was talking to Rosita. The morning had started the process all over again and here she is, left feeling defeated. Feeling stupid and worthless for even hoping she might’ve gotten through to Michelle. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole and Wynonna soothe her quietly, standing close to her and letting her have a minute. Wynonna looks up at her best friend and watches the way Nicole bends just so, whispering quietly to Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They say a stupid popscicle stick joke that makes Waverly laugh through her tears and the corner of Nicole’s mouth pulls up in that dumb dopey grin. Wynonna’s heart feels filled with light. She’s smiling before she even realizes it. </span>
</p>
<p><em><span>I’m so lucky.</span></em> <em><span>I’m so lucky she loves my sister.</span></em><span> Wynonna’s mind wanders in a million directions and lands on Nicole’s words from the night before.</span><em><span> The only person I wanna kiss is ‘Nonna.</span></em><span> Wynonna swallows hard. </span></p>
<p>
  <span>They hadn’t talked about that again. Nicole tried to and Wynonna deflected. Changed the subject. </span>
  <em>
    <span>If you ever asked me out of the blue how I really felt, I don’t have a clue how it’d go,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Wynonna thinks honestly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When those brown eyes turn to look at her, she tucks that thought away for a later time. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What’daya say, ‘Nonna? Think we can stop by the place with the vegan ice cream on the way home?” Nicole says softly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna’s eyes drift down to Waverly who still looks tired and a little bit sad, but she smiles gently. Soothed by Nicole’s gentleness. Wynonna knows that feeling all too well and a matching smile turns up the corners of her lips. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think that sounds like a plan, Haughty. C’mon, I’ll even buy this for you so you can serenade your girlfriend.” Wynonna takes the songbook from Waverly’s hands. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey! That’s so not why I have that…” Waverly tries to defend herself, stepping out from under Nicole’s arm. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s hands go up in surrender when Waverly looks in their direction and she starts to walk away, pushing short hair back behind her ears and laughing a little. Wynonna wraps her arm around Waverly’s shoulders instead, both of them walking behind Nicole towards the counter. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Relax, just wanted to make you get all squeaky. Playing an Elvis song or two could be really cool.” Wynonna tells her baby sister, leaning in and pressing a kiss against the side of her head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thanks for – not thinking it’s dumb.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thinking what’s dumb?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Me. Liking Rosita. Wanting to believe in Mama. Any of that.” Waverly sighs. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna stops them for a moment, looking down at Waverly who looks up at her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re certainly not dumb for liking Rosita, baby girl. The woman is perfect. And you’re not dumb for wanting things to be okay either. For loving her, despite… everything. You have a big heart, that’s all. I’ll never think it’s dumb.” Wynonna assures, brushing away a stray tear from Waverly’s cheek. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly settles back into Wynonna’s side and nods, both of them resuming their walk and looking ahead. Wynonna glances down at Waverly and finds her smiling softly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing, just… I’m glad you met Nicole. I love her a lot.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna pushes out a breath through her nose and smiles to one side, watching the redhead who is leaning against the counter and smiling. Making the man working laugh as he grabs the pack of guitar strings Nicole picked out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Me too, Waves. They’re the best.” Wynonna says, her voice dripping with love. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly glances up to her sister at both the sound of the way she says the words and the pronoun usage. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna looks down, realizing and nods once, letting Waverly know it’s deliberate. “She mentioned wanting to try it out last night.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, both then?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, both.” Wynonna confirms. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It suits them.” Waverly smiles, both of them watching Nicole pull out her wallet to pay the man. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Just before, she turns towards them and motions for them to hurry up. Wynonna pushes Waverly forward and speeds up a little, both of them moving to Nicole’s side. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Long fingers reach out and take the book from Wynonna’s arms and put it down on the counter with the strings. Waverly immediately turns to face her sister and smiles up at her, shaking her head slightly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I was gonna get that, Haughtstuff.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, too bad. I’m getting the ice cream, too, so…” Nicole says coyly as she takes out the amount of cash needed and hands it over. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wynonna rolls her eyes playfully, the sideways smile still in place on her lips. Nicole says goodbye to the worker and takes the bag, opting to carry it as well. Once they’re out on the sidewalk, the three of them walk in a line with Nicole in the middle. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span> “What did I tell you?” Wynonna directs the question to Waverly, looking across Nicole to her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Pretty sure you said they’re the best, which is totally right.” Waverly beams, looking up at Nicole as she says it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole’s eyes widen and she seems to light up a little. Slowly, her cheeks turn red and her smile widens as she looks between the two women. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, Wynonna told you…” Nicole nods, looking shyly at the ground. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For a moment, Wynonna gets a little worried that she’s stepped out of line. “I just said it and she asked about it… I hope it’s okay, Nic, I’m sorry, I…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Nicole reaches for Wynonna’s hand with her free one and squeezes, washing away Wynonna’s worry immediately. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The fact that they only just talked about the pronoun shift the night before and Wynonna is saying it when Nicole isn’t listening means everything to them. Not that she expected anything less. Wynonna is more kind and considerate than she’ll ever let herself believe. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s more than okay. Thank you for… for being you. Both of you.” Nicole says, looking down at Waverly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The shortest woman takes the opportunity to rest her hands on Nicole’s broad shoulder and push up on her tiptoes, pressing a kiss to Nicole’s cheek. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What was that for?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“For buying my book. And our ice cream. And because I’m proud of you.” Waverly tells her, looking ahead again and shoving her hands deep into her jacket to escape the chilly night air. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Damn, Red. You’re gettin’ all the kisses lately.” Wynonna teases, even if the kiss she’d been forced to watch this morning still made her blood burn. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, shut up.” Nicole rolls their eyes, scoffing loudly and shaking her head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ummmm? What’s that supposed to mean?!” Waverly squeaks, obviously having missed something. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The question and the way it’s asked makes Wynonna laugh loudly, her hand still tight in Nicole’s. “Maybe Haughty will tell you over ice cream.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly tries not to let her mind wander too wild. Surely if Nicole and Wynonna had kissed Wynonna would’ve told her, right? Right?! And why would Nicole kiss someone else when Waverly is so sure that they… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s so stupid, Waverly. Not a big deal at all. Your sister is so full of it.” Nicole sighs, letting go of Wynonna once they’re in front of the ice cream place. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Waverly heaves a sigh of relief, knowing that must mean it’s not about a kiss with her sister. But why would Nicole… </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Go on, order up then I’ll tell you about kissing Alex since apparently Wynonna wants to hear about it again so goddamn bad.” Nicole chews at the inside of her jaw and pulls the door open, holding it for the shorter women. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You kissed Alex?!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae is laying on her stomach, sprawled across her bed with a pencil in hand. The lead scribbles across the notebook resting on the mattress in front of her, putting down the words that have been floating through her head since she and Waverly worked on a track a few days ago. The track is playing through the one airpod in her ear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Cleo is laying with her head resting against the small of Shae’s back, looking up at her phone. The section of twitter that is highly invested in Chasing Skylarks is still going hard about last night’s show. Cleo spends some time watching short videos that have been posted and saving some pictures she knows the girls will want to see. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Unsurprisingly, much of the hype revolves around Wynonna’s emotional song and the sexy, intense duet with Nicole. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s so fucking stupid how Nicole and Wynonna aren’t dating.” Cleo reads aloud. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are... are you telling me? Like I don’t already know?” Shae murmurs, tapping her pencil against the paper for a minute and looking over at her phone where a few lines Waverly wrote are waiting to be put in. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s a tweet, someone tweeted that.” Cleo clarifies, sighing and continuing to scroll. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Tell these people to join the fucking club. Wait… don’t actually tell them that, though.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not like they need me to, anyway. Most of these posts are about them grinding all over each other during their song.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Pretends to be shocked. Also, baby, what do you think about the name </span>
  <em>
    <span>Right Now</span>
  </em>
  <span> for this?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Holy shit…” Cleo mutters under her breath. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There’s a tweet with over a thousand likes and almost as many retweets of a blogpost link. Cleo clicks it and immediately is met with a huge, professional looking picture of Wynonna and Nicole face to face, nose to nose. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That good, huh?” Shae grins, feeling proud of herself. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not the song title… it is really good though. I’m just – look at this…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If it’s Nicole drooling over Wynonna I don’t need to see a pic, I see it every day.” Shae sighs, dropping the pencil and turning her head to look at the phone Cleo is holding up anyway. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her eyes widen when she reads the headline on the post. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Wynonna Earp of Chasing Skylarks Getting Steamy with Guitarist Girlfriend While Her Ex Plays Drums for Her </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Holy…” Shae reads it and reads it again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her eyes drift down to the rest of the post, reading all the shamey and accusing things this person decided to write. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They’re not… they’re not dating though why would someone write it like that?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“People do this kind of thing all the time… not exactly surprising with how the situation looked either.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck. What do we do? Tell Rosita? Tell Nicole and Wynonna? I don’t think they’ll really give a shit, but I don’t know. I don’t want anyone’s feelings hurt by something so stupid.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ll text it to Rosita first, let her decide. If any of them get online though, they’ll probably see it.” Cleo sighs, typing out a message to Rosita and sending the link along. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“God, this is so stupid…” Shae takes the airpod out and rubs her forehead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, if they’d just fucking date like that tweet said we wouldn’t have to put up with this.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Babe… that’s like the whole problem. This person thinks they are and that Wynonna is rubbing it in Alex’s face.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Cleo considers it for a moment, pushing her lips out with the thought. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I guess. But at least if they were dating it wouldn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>all</span>
  </em>
  <span> be a lie.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shae rolls her eyes, pulling a pillow from the top of the bed and putting it over her head. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you guys for hopping onto this wild ride! </p><p>If you have any questions, most of you know where to reach us on twitter. I'm <a href="https://twitter.com/wynskellen">@wynskellen</a> and Colbs is <a href="https://twitter.com/wynonnasnicole">@wynonnasnicole</a>. </p><p>I am going to work on catching up on my comment inbox on here as well, so feel free to ask in the comments!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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